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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24716848">Crest of Riegan</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/JaneBuzJane/pseuds/JaneBuzJane'>JaneBuzJane</a>, <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/notallbees/pseuds/notallbees'>notallbees</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Awkward Sexual Situations, Canon-Typical Violence, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Fire Emblem: Three Houses Golden Deer Route, Fire Emblem: Three Houses Golden Deer Route Spoilers, M/M, Nightmares, Post-Timeskip | War Phase (Fire Emblem: Three Houses), Pre-Timeskip | Academy Phase (Fire Emblem: Three Houses), Psychological Trauma, Slow Burn, War</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-06-14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 00:53:45</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>64,160</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24716848</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/JaneBuzJane/pseuds/JaneBuzJane, https://archiveofourown.org/users/notallbees/pseuds/notallbees</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Lorenz Hellman Gloucester sacrificed everything to become the next leader of the Leicester Alliance. </p><p>And then Claude von Riegan was chosen instead.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Lorenz Hellman Gloucester/Claude von Riegan</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>191</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>258</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>This is inspired by <a href="https://twitter.com/MichelleDixArt/">MichelleDixArt</a>'s two crest Lorenz AU! We took a bunch of liberties, because that's what we do :3c</p><p>You can see examples of the AU <a href="https://twitter.com/MichelleDixArt/status/1235391970413068288">here</a>, <a href="https://twitter.com/MichelleDixArt/status/1236636301870407680">here</a> and <a href="https://twitter.com/MichelleDixArt/status/1241397072202514432">here</a>.</p>
    </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Please see chapter end notes for specific chapter <b>warnings</b>!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Lorenz woke with a start, the dregs of a nightmare still clinging to him. He blinked up at the ceiling of his dorm room, relieved for a moment to be awake and safe, but it was short-lived. Panic tore through him as he realised that he couldn't move, his arms dead weight at his sides, his whole body heavy as though weighed down by stones. The only thing he could move was his eyes, and he looked around the room as best he could.</p><p>While he still lay there paralysed, Lorenz heard a familiar low creak, and he glanced over to see that his bedroom door was opening. He felt briefly relieved—here was one of his classmates to rouse him, surely they'd be able to help him—before recalling that he'd locked the door the night before, as he always did. </p><p>Panic swept through him. And then Lorenz heard it; the low, far-off chanting, as of a thousand discordant voices, building slowly at the edges of his hearing. The door continued to creak open, and then he heard the heavy tread of someone stepping inside. </p><p>Lorenz opened his mouth to scream, but nothing would come out. He couldn't even whisper. He could hear himself making pathetic little choking sounds, but nothing that could summon a fellow student to his aid. The shadowy figure drew closer to the bed, and Lorenz whimpered as he made out the shape of it out of the corner of his eye. He could see no distinguishing feature, only a dark, cowled shape, somehow too slim and tall, as though it had been stretched. Thin, spidery arms reached over him, and the cowled head bent down over his face. </p><p>With a desperate groan, Lorenz closed his eyes and put all his energy into trying to move. He twitched his thumb, and then his fingers followed. A moment later, he managed to curl his toes. Slowly, feeling and life returned to his limbs, and when he finally opened his eyes again a minute or so later, his room was empty, the door shut. Lorenz sat up slowly, groaning with the effort. He felt as though he were wading through treacle, his whole body weighed down still. </p><p>Sitting up at last, Lorenz rested his elbows on his knees and put his head in his hands, breathing hard. Flashes of his nightmare were still fresh in his mind, and he had no doubt that it had been the cause of his hallucination. He closed his eyes, trying desperately to block the images out of his mind, to clear the unsettling chanting from his ears. Finally, he pushed himself to his feet. The dormitory was quiet, but Lorenz could hear an unusual amount of bustle outside. Going to his window, he looked down into the courtyard, and realised that it was much later than he had assumed. Students milled to and fro, mixing with knights and servants.</p><p>Cursing under his breath, Lorenz hurried to wash his face and dress. By the time he arrived in class, having overslept and missed breakfast, Lorenz was in no mood for Claude's usual antics. Claude, on the other hand, seemed to be on top form, and had been needling him since he arrived five minutes late. Lorenz wasn't sure which annoyed him more; Claude's smug grin, or the knowledge that there was now a blemish on his previously spotless attendance record.</p><p>"Hilda?" the Professor asked, tacking her name onto the end of their question.</p><p>"Oh, Professor, I'd <i>love</i>  to answer your question," Hilda said with cloying sweetness, "but I wasn't paying attention."</p><p>"Professor, if I may," Claude said in an arch tone, leaning back in his seat. "I think you should direct the question to Lorenz, since he knows the most about trade attempts between the Alliance and Almyra."</p><p>Lorenz clenched his jaw as the Professor's gaze landed on him. "Doubtless what Claude says is true," he said stiffly. "But I'd much rather let my peers educate themselves on the matter than deliver them the information directly by virtue of my answer." </p><p>"That your way of saying no, big guy?" Raphael's voice boomed out from the back of the room. "Coulda just said so!" </p><p>Lorenz narrowed his eyes at Claude's irrationally smug expression. "Yes, indeed. Since Claude is so quick to brush off the subject, perhaps <i>he</i>  should be the one to answer."</p><p>"I <i>could</i>," Claude said, winking at Lorenz as he batted it back to him, "but as you know, we all <i>so</i>  love hearing you talk."</p><p>Heat rushed to Lorenz's cheeks, and he clenched his quill so hard that it snapped, spattering ink over his hand. "Damnation—in the time you've spent teasing me about this, you could have answered the question yourself and been done with it, von Riegan." Normally, he would withdraw at this point, if not sooner, but Lorenz was tired after his fitful sleep, and weary of enduring Claude's jabs and criticism. "The way you demean your house, and this vital institution, is utterly despicable. If you see so little value in these lessons, not to mention the time of your Professor and fellow students, perhaps you ought to go back where you came from, and let the rest of us learn in peace!"</p><p>As he spoke, Claude's eyes widened. Lorenz often fell into Claude's little traps, but he rarely rose to his taunts in this manner, let alone going so far as to scold him like a child. Lorenz was well aware that he sounded as he did when lecturing his younger siblings, but he could hardly be blamed for the fact that Claude insisted on acting like an infant. </p><p>Someone whistled lowly. Claude narrowed his eyes at him, although his relaxed posture and expression otherwise didn't change. "Seems I'm not the one disrupting the peace," he said evenly. "With all that hot air coming from you, I bet you'll have no trouble blowing me right back to 'where I came from'." </p><p>Lorenz fished a handkerchief out of his pocket with trembling hands. He hadn't meant to comment on Claude's mysterious origins, knowing that such crass implications were beneath him, but he could see that his wording had failed him. Still, Claude's demeanour did not induce him to an apology. "If you think my words little better than the breezes that flow through the courtyard, that only serves to prove my point that you have no listening comprehension skills. As a future leader, it is your duty to address that issue with haste." He blotted the ink covering his hand with a corner of expensive linen, lips pursed tightly in an attempt to retain his composure.</p><p>But Claude wasn't done; he gave a humourless laugh, looking around briefly before narrowing his gaze at Lorenz once more. "You know, Lorenz, you might be more popular if you spent less time worrying about how my leadership skills are developing, and worried more about your own image."</p><p><i>Your image.</i> The words chilled Lorenz to his core, and he stiffened and lifted his head again.</p><p>"Alright, Claude—" the Professor said, attempting to interject.</p><p>Lorenz, however, had heard enough. He slammed down his handkerchief, making poor Marianne jump and give a little cry, and stood hastily. "I have heard quite enough," he said, his voice barely above a whisper. "If—if you knew what has been <i>sacrificed</i>—"</p><p>"Oh, this will be good," Claude said, grinning at him. "The heir to one of the most powerful noble houses in the Alliance wants you all to hear about his own virtuous sacrifice—"</p><p>"How <i>dare</i>  you," Lorenz hissed, striding across the classroom. He was dimly aware of the scrape of benches and desks around him as several of his classmates got to their feet, but Claude didn't move. He sat watching Lorenz with that inscrutable gaze as he advanced, which only incensed Lorenz further, setting a fire in the pit of his stomach. "You—" Lorenz began, holding up a finger which was shaking with rage. "You have <i>no idea</i>  what I have endured in preparing myself to take on the mantle of leading the Alliance, only to be usurped by a—a scoundrel and a—a <i>bastard</i>—"   </p><p>"Woah, Lorenz—"<br/>
"That's enough, come on—"</p><p>The voices of their classmates were nothing. Claude shot to his feet, his face cold and still as he glared up at Lorenz. "Like it or not," he hissed, "I <i>am</i>  the rightful heir to House Riegan, and if you refuse to work with me, you can just—"</p><p>"That is <i>enough</i>!" </p><p>The Professor's voice, suddenly pitched at a volume for carrying across battlefields rather than classrooms, rang through the hall, silencing the flood of shouting and confusion. Lorenz was breathing hard, but before he could see whether Claude was similarly affected, he turned on his heel and stalked back to his desk. The sea of his classmates parted to make way for him, turning their faces away to stare wide-eyed at the Professor or snicker behind their hands, depending on their nature. All except Lysithea, who scrutinised Lorenz with a watchful gaze. </p><p>Lorenz sank onto the bench and touched his fingers to his forehead in an attempt to stave the flood of wrathful tears he felt burning behind his eyes. </p><p>"I don't know what's gotten into you two, and I'm not sure I want to know," the Professor said firmly. "The two of you have stable duty this evening. Address whatever conflict remains between you." </p><p>The <i>scandal.</i> Stable duty, and with that wretch. The house of Gloucester had never been brought so low. </p><p>Nevertheless, Lorenz nodded. After a beat, Claude's voice rang out, cheerfully hollow. "Anything for you, Teach!" </p><p>As class resumed, Lorenz leaned across the aisle. "Lysithea. Do you perhaps have a, ah—a spare quill I could borrow?"</p><p>She nodded and retrieved one for him, although as she handed it across, he found her searching his face—for what, he couldn't say. "What is it?" he murmured.</p><p>Lysithea cocked her head. "I was just wondering, was your hair always that colour?"</p><p>Lorenz stared at her. "I—"</p><p>"Lorenz, Lysithea, please. We've had enough disruption for one morning."</p><p>"Yes, Professor."</p><p>"My sincere apologies, Professor."</p><p>Lorenz quickly turned his eyes back to his work, although he now found his thoughts turning over a new matter, blissfully distracting himself from Claude's nonsense; Lysithea's hair was precisely the same shade as his own.</p><p> </p><p>—</p><p> </p><p>Lorenz and Claude both arrived promptly after classes to perform their duties, each having traded their school uniforms for simple clothing they could afford to get dirty. Tentative bickering more in their usual vein carried them through the laundry list of chores handed to them by the stablemaster. The tension between them was palpable, but not unbearable, until Claude accidentally dropped an empty feed bucket on Lorenz's foot. </p><p>Lorenz hopped up and down, swearing, as Claude snorted. "Claude, I simply <i>must</i>  ask," Lorenz said through gritted teeth. "Are you <i>trying</i>  to make my day as miserable as possible?" </p><p>He rolled his ankle, testing its range of movement, not expecting Claude to answer. It was unlike Claude to single him out for punishment, though the incident in class that morning had been a rare example. </p><p>"Are you alright?" Claude asked, once he'd composed himself. "I really didn't mean to do that, sorry."</p><p>Glancing up, Lorenz found that he did at least appear somewhat contrite. "I think I shall pull through," he sighed. “Thank you for your concern.” </p><p>Claude nodded, his mouth a thin line. “Lorenz, look, I'm sorry for this morning, too. I shouldn’t have said what I did.” </p><p>Lorenz straightened with a sniff. "No, you shouldn't, but even so, that gave me absolutely no right to speak to you in such a despicable manner. Such behaviour is beneath one such as myself, and I must endeavour to—"</p><p>Claude sighed. "Never mind."</p><p>"No, Claude, please," Lorenz said, grimacing at himself for getting carried away again. "I owe you a sincere apology for my words, and my tone." Lorenz inclined his head slightly. "I am very sorry, and I hope the sting of my words faded quickly."</p><p>Claude waved his hand. “Water under the bridge, Lorenz. We’ve all said things we regret.” </p><p>“Yes, but it’s important that we <i>learn</i> from such things, rather than let them foster resentment.” </p><p>"Oh?" Claude said, laughter in his voice. “If learning is so important, why didn’t you just answer the question this morning, and let our peers absorb that glorious knowledge?” Claude began to climb the ladder to the hayloft, Lorenz drifting behind.</p><p>Lorenz took a breath and let it out slowly, refusing to let Claude needle him again; it was, he knew, just the way Claude talked, and not necessarily designed to irritate him. "I had a...difficult morning," he said, as he set his foot on the bottom rung and began to climb up after Claude. "I let my frustration get the better of me."</p><p>"Ah, well," Claude sighed, stretching as he stepped up onto the stage of the hayloft. "I didn't help matters by teasing you. Now <i>nobody</i>  gets to learn about how the price of peas in Sreng influences the fur market in Almyra."</p><p>Lorenz huffed as he reached the top of the ladder and stepped off. "Don't be absurd, the price of peas in Sreng has nothing to do with the Almyran fur trade."</p><p>Claude grinned at him. "Oh no? And why is that?"</p><p>"Because there <i>is</i>  no fur trade in Almyra, you buffoon," Lorenz snapped. "It's too damned hot there."</p><p>"Oh?" Claude said, pausing for a moment to prop his elbow on the end of the broom he'd picked up. "How many times have <i>you</i>  been to Almyra?"</p><p>"Well, I—"</p><p>"Almyra is twice the size of Fódlan, and I hear the mountainous regions to the Northeast are rather cold in winter. Not a patch on Faerghus, no doubt, but nonetheless…"</p><p>Lorenz rolled his eyes. "Then I suppose you shall have to tell me what books <i>you</i>  have been reading on the subject," he said, whirling on his heel and stalking across the hayloft to grab the pitchfork hanging on the wall. "Because that kind of information certainly isn't available in the monastery library, from what I've—" Lorenz broke off suddenly as a board creaked underfoot, and the rotten wood gave way beneath him. With a shriek, he pitched forward, arms wheeling as he found himself thrown off-balance, dangerously close to the edge.</p><p>"Lorenz!" </p><p>Claude lunged forward, catching Lorenz by the back of his shirt. Lorenz heard the sound of it tearing in Claude's hand, and he scrabbled to get his feet back under him as Claude gave an almighty tug, pulling him back to safety. They crashed to the floor together, Lorenz half in Claude's lap and both of them panting. Lorenz's heart was beating so fast that he feared he might faint. </p><p>"I—goodness, I—" Lorenz blinked around him, realising in a flash that he was still sprawled across Claude's legs. He moved backward, scrambling away from him. "M-my apologies." He looked over his shoulder at the broken floorboard, the unguarded edge of the hayloft stage, the perilous drop below. Lorenz swallowed thickly, unsettled by how close he'd come to being undone, broken upon the stable floor before he'd had a chance to make use of the potential his father had had instilled in him. "I—I thank you, Claude." His voice shook. Looking down at his hands, he saw that they, too, were unsteady. </p><p>Claude cleared his throat, then he rose, brushing himself off with brisk motions. "Think nothing of it. We may have our differences, but I wasn't about to let you crack that silly head open."</p><p>"No," Lorenz breathed softly. "I suppose we ought to tell the stablemaster about this flooring. Imagine if I'd been up here alone."</p><p>"Lucky that you weren't then," Claude said, brushing his hands off against each other before reaching down to offer Lorenz a hand up.</p><p>Lorenz reached out to accept it without thinking, and then almost toppled back off the ledge again when every nerve ending in his body lit up all at once: a sudden, overwhelming buzzing that filled him from head to toe. His eyes widened, and he saw Claude's do the same, while Lorenz found his fingers clenching involuntarily, unable to release Claude's hand even if he'd wanted to. Claude had stiffened, staring at Lorenz, though after a moment he looked down at their joined hands. </p><p>"Have you been practising your reason skills?" Claude asked, the humour in his voice falling flat. </p><p>Lorenz swallowed. "I—yes, of course, but that's—I'm not doing anything, Claude, stop fooling about!" </p><p>To his surprise, Claude only laughed breathlessly. "You know I can't cast so much as a candle flame," he said, his intense gaze skipping up to Lorenz's face again. "How could I be doing this? Whatever this is…" </p><p>"I—" Lorenz began, but trailed off almost immediately as Claude reached for his other hand, interlacing their fingers. The brush of his skin sent another ripple of lightning running through him, and Lorenz shuddered as gooseflesh erupted over his skin, pulling tight every hair on his body. His scalp tingled as light and heat sparked their way across his skin. "You're making it worse," he whispered, "the more you touch." Despite his own realisation, he didn't let go, instead stroking his thumb across Claude's skin curiously.</p><p>"Perhaps I should stop touching then," Claude murmured, though he made no move to withdraw. Lorenz found that he didn't <i>want</i>  Claude to stop, not wanting the strange, pleasurable tingling to end, eager to know what had caused it. With a soft sound, Claude pulled Lorenz further away from the edge, and closer toward him at the same time. "Did you...touch anything strange?" he asked, wonderingly.</p><p>"Only <i>you</i>," Lorenz said, though his retort came out much breathier than he would have liked as he found himself almost chest to chest with Claude, an unfamiliar and unwanted proximity. "I—"</p><p>Rational thought caught up to him in that moment; could it be caused by his second crest? The Crest of Riegan. Perhaps it was...answering some sort of call from Claude's crest. Lorenz carefully schooled his face into stillness as he blinked down at Claude.</p><p>"What about you?" he asked in an arch tone. "No dabbling in late night potion experiments?"</p><p>"Ha! Not recently." Claude frowned, and moved his hand along Lorenz's arm, up to his shoulder. "There must be a reason why…"</p><p>The sensation dulled when his fingers moved away from Lorenz's bare skin, but when Claude tentatively brushed his fingertips against Lorenz's neck, it returned with force, and Lorenz's cheeks flamed at the sudden burst of sensation.</p><p>"O-oh," Claude whispered, his bright eyes widening again. "It's—your skin." </p><p>"And yours," Lorenz replied softly. For his part, Lorenz found himself powerless to move away from Claude's touch. Sparks seemed to skitter down his skin, as though from a blacksmith's hammer striking iron. Feeling bold, or perhaps just curious, he lifted his open hand and cupped Claude's cheek. To his shock, Claude gave a shudder and leaned into his touch, his eyes fluttering closed. His long, dark eyelashes brushed his cheek, and, so close, Lorenz realised that he had a faint scattering of freckles across the bridge of his nose and his cheekbones. He was, in fact, really quite attractive, despite his unruly hair and the unusually dark shade of his skin, and his tendency to say entirely the wrong thing at any given moment. </p><p>Lorenz swallowed heavily, his throat tight and his fingers trembling as he identified the strange feeling that coursed through him; it was arousal, shuddery and overwhelming, like nothing he'd ever experienced before. </p><p>"Gods," Claude whispered, opening his eyes and gazing up at Lorenz with a soft, hazy look. "Have you...ever felt like this?"</p><p>Lorenz shook his head, eerily aware of the brush of his hair over the back of his neck, of the faint breeze through his torn shirt, and the way the fabric of his clothing seemed suddenly far too rough. Every sense was on alert. "No. I've never—not like this. I don't think this is natural. This feeling." </p><p>Claude breathed out heavily, leaning closer. "Natural or not, it's—"</p><p>"Indescribable," Lorenz sighed.</p><p>"Mm."</p><p>Lorenz closed his eyes. Claude's breath was warm against his throat, and he still hadn't removed his hand from Claude's cheek. Instinctively, he leaned down and pressed his cheek against Claude's, and both groaned at the new rush of sensation. Before Lorenz could catch his breath, Claude's hand moved inside the torn flap of his shirt and pressed against his ribcage. </p><p>"Oh," Lorenz gasped, and then his lips were on Claude's, and they were kissing, their noses bumping, clumsy and desperate. Lorenz parted Claude's mouth with his tongue, sliding his hand around to cup the back of Claude's neck, then sliding up into his unruly hair. Claude tilted his face up toward him, releasing Lorenz's hand finally and pulling the torn remnants of his shirt out of his breeches so that he could get both hands on Lorenz's bare skin. </p><p>Lorenz's heart was racing, deafening in his own ears. He'd never touched anyone this way, never kissed anyone, but he was certain that it wasn't meant to feel like <i>this</i>. His senses were filled to the brim, overflowing with the scent of Claude's hair and the soft, slippery feel of his lips and tongue, and his warm, rough fingers moving over his chest. Arousal surged through him, his cock filling from the moment he'd felt the soft surrender of Claude's mouth beneath his own. He clutched at Claude's shoulders, swallowing Claude's urgent moans and loosing his own with no trace of self-consciousness. He felt as though he were on fire, except that there was no pain, only the agonising waves of arousal tearing through him.</p><p>They broke apart to catch their breath, and Claude nuzzled Lorenz's cheek with his lips, sighing. "Lorenz, gods, I…"</p><p>"I know," Lorenz whispered, running his fingers through Claude's soft curls. "I—I know." Inspired by the sensations bursting on his own skin, Lorenz reached between them to fumble with the fastening of Claude's breeches, tugging his shirt free as soon as he'd loosened them, and sliding his hands around Claude's slim waist. </p><p>Claude shuddered, dropping his forehead onto Lorenz's shoulder. "O-oh, gods—goddess."</p><p>"You—you feel—" Lorenz began, before abandoning speech and applying his mouth to the warm, damp, tantalising curve of Claude's neck. The sound Claude made in response was a flame set to the kindling of his desires, and suddenly the urgency returned to them tenfold. They sighed and groaned and tugged at each other's clothing in their determination to touch any part of the other they could manage. They fell into another passionate kiss, Claude's tongue in his mouth this time while Lorenz daringly pushed his hands down the back of Claude's breeches, cupping his pert backside and pulling their hips together. Claude's own arousal was firm and hot against his thigh, though Lorenz scarcely noticed it, unable to focus on any one specific sensation when he felt as if he were drawing trails of light across Claude's skin, bright currents and whorls that left afterimages on his eyelids when he closed his eyes.</p><p>Cupping the back of his neck to lead the kiss, Claude pushed his fingers into Lorenz's hair and tugged it. </p><p>Lorenz gave a low cry, a burst of pleasant heat suffusing his body. "Claude," he groaned, the hint of pain giving him back control of his faculties for a few moments. "We must—we can't, not <i>here</i>, if someone sees—"</p><p>"Nn—nobody's come in," Claude murmured, his voice weak. "The whole time we've been here." </p><p>Lorenz had to admit that he was right; by this time, most students would be at their evening meal, or visiting the bathhouse, both events that Lorenz had been eagerly anticipating until he felt the magic of Claude's fingers on his skin, painting his body with golden sparks. Releasing Lorenz's hair, Claude reached between them and wrenched Lorenz's breeches open, shoving them down with both hands. Lorenz's cock bounced free, slapping against Claude's bare hip, and Lorenz's knees buckled.</p><p>Neither was prepared for it, and the two went down in a tangle of limbs, slumped on a pile of straw. With impressive foresight, Claude reached around for a discarded horse blanket and rolled them over on top of it, before diving in to press his open mouth to Lorenz's once more. </p><p>Lorenz clung to him, uncaring of the dusty scent of hay, or the cloying, musky stench of the horse blanket. Claude was on top of him, and Lorenz used the leverage to work Claude's own breeches down, groping at his bare backside with a sigh. </p><p>"Damn it," Claude swore suddenly, breaking away from him. He sat up and hauled his shirt off, then reached down to help Lorenz out of his own. When they came together again, the sensation of Claude's bare chest against his own flooded him with a shower of warmth, and for several moments all they could do was lie pressed together, hands roaming over the revealed skin. </p><p>Lorenz felt drenched in pleasure, near drowning in it, and it took him several minutes to identify the insistent throbbing of his cock, trapped against Claude's hip, while Claude's own cock pulsed hot and heavy against his stomach. With a sigh, Lorenz gripped Claude's backside again and tugged their hips together, until Claude rolled down against him, and they both shuddered and moaned brokenly.</p><p>"More," Lorenz demanded, clutching at him uselessly.</p><p>Claude nodded. "I, mm—I want—" He shook his head, dropping his forehead to Lorenz's shoulder again and then grinding against him. </p><p>With a moan, Lorenz planted his heel and thrust up against him, and the two began to move against each other, shifting and sighing, quickening to a pace Lorenz rarely allowed himself to reach when pleasuring himself alone. "Oh, Claude, oh—" Lorenz cupped the back of Claude's neck, seeking his mouth like an imperative and claiming it in desperation. "Saints, please…"</p><p>The pleasure was like nothing he'd experienced alone, the feeling amplified tenfold, and Lorenz cried out again as he began to peak far sooner than usual. He turned his head and bit into Claude's shoulder, both to muffle himself and to channel some of the overwhelming sensation. He had no notion of how much noise they were making, only that it seemed like a lot, and just because they hadn't been interrupted <i>yet</i>  didn't mean that they were safe forever. </p><p>"Did you—Lorenz, are you—" Claude broke off with a soft cry of his own, and Lorenz whimpered and clung on tighter when he felt Claude spill over his stomach, his spending hot and ticklish on Lorenz's oversensitive skin.  </p><p>They collapsed into one another, overwhelmed. Their chests heaved in tandem, sending incessant sparks rippling over Lorenz each time their skin brushed together. Lorenz idly stroked the back of Claude's neck, running his fingers through the short, fine hair there. Claude's slowing breaths skipped over his throat, while one of his thumbs stroked absently back and forth over Lorenz's nipple, occasionally interrupting his receding arousal with a little spark of excitement. </p><p>At last, the violent flush of arousal and afterglow subsided enough for Claude to push himself up on one hand, blinking as though he'd woken from a long slumber. </p><p>"Well," Lorenz murmured, turning his gaze away from the sight of Claude's pretty face still flushed, his unruly hair turned to a bird's nest. </p><p>The corner of Claude's mouth tilted. "Well well." He laughed softly and pushed himself up to a sitting position, wincing as his skin peeled stickily away from Lorenz's. "Stablework isn't as dull as I've been led to believe."</p><p>Lorenz flushed, and gave a small, embarrassed cough as he too moved to a sitting position, seating himself a respectable arm's reach away from Claude. "I doubt the Professor meant for us to spend our punishment time doing <i>that</i>."</p><p>"Perhaps," Claude said, laughing, "but I wouldn't put it past them."</p><p>"Indeed," Lorenz huffed, rolling his eyes. </p><p>Claude hummed softly, thoughtful. "Tell me, do you make a habit of getting your trousers down in the hayloft?"</p><p>"No!" Lorenz snapped. He got shakily to his feet, tucking himself back into his breeches with a wince. His stomach was covered in their sticky, half-dried spending, but he tried to ignore it as he pulled his torn shirt back on. "I've never—" He cut himself off, sighing. "It serves no purpose for me."</p><p>"I believe it serves <i>some</i>  purpose," Claude said, laughing. </p><p>Lorenz clicked his tongue, resisting the urge to smile. "Let me rephrase. It doesn't help me further my goals, therefore it is useless to me."</p><p>"What of when you marry?" Claude asked in a wheedling tone as he dressed. Lorenz got the distinct feeling that he was being teased again. "Gloucester will need a mistress, after all. Don't you ever think about…<i>trying things out</i>, before you make your final decision?"</p><p>Before he could stop himself, Lorenz let out a bitter laugh. "Of course not, I—" He paused, biting his tongue and cursing himself for being unnecessarily forthcoming in the aftermath of...whatever had just happened between them. "No. We shall learn it on our own, as intended by nature." The words rang hollow, and Lorenz winced as he turned away; no wonder everyone thought him pompous and frivolous. </p><p>An awkward silence descended between them, and Lorenz stepped away to allow Claude to finish dressing in peace.</p><p>"I can finish up here," Claude said after a minute, when the rustling had ceased. "If you want to go get cleaned up properly."</p><p>Lorenz shook his head. "I could offer the same. This whole...debacle was my doing, after all."</p><p>Claude raised an eyebrow at him. "Oh really?"</p><p>"In that I was the one that nearly fell off the hayloft, was I not?"</p><p>Claude gave a soft huff of laughter. "I don't know if that really counts as starting <i>that</i>, but I make it my policy not to interfere if someone else wants to take the blame for me."</p><p>"I don't know that there's <i>blame</i>  to be had," Lorenz said in a sniffy voice. "Merely responsibility."</p><p>"Fair enough," Claude said, laughing as he held his hands up in surrender. "I have to admit though, I'm curious. You really don't have any idea what could have caused this?"</p><p>A sudden flash of a cold cell, a pool of warm blood, deep, far-off chanting. Lorenz bit the inside of his cheek sharply. "No. None."</p><p>"Hm. Well, maybe we should look into this some more, try and figure out—" </p><p>"I don't think that would be wise," Lorenz said sharply. He avoided meeting Claude's gaze as he moved over to pick up the pitchfork that had started this whole thing, taking much more care this time about where he was placing his feet. When he looked back, Claude had averted his own gaze, his jaw tight. He already looked regretful, disgusted by what they'd done. Something in the pit of Lorenz's stomach quailed and shriveled up very small. Sighing, he gestured with the pitchfork. "Shall we?"</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p><b>Warning</b>: The chapter begins with Lorenz waking from a nightmare and experiencing sleep paralysis.</p><p>Later in the chapter Lorenz and Claude have sex. While this is consensual in the moment, it is caused by a magical element and could read as mildly dubious consent.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Several days passed quietly. Lorenz did his best to avoid bickering with Claude, refusing to let himself rise to the other boy's bait, although it was fair to say that Claude showed unusual restraint following their encounter. Lorenz could only suppose that he truly had been so repulsed by the series of events that he couldn't even bring himself to tease Lorenz any longer. </p><p>For his part, Lorenz had retrieved a pair of soft leather gloves from his belongings as soon as he returned from the stables, and had worn them ever since, unwilling to risk such an incident occurring again. </p><p>At the start of the following week, Lorenz received a letter from his father. His back stiffened as the envelope was delivered into his hands and he recognised the elegant handwriting. It was several weeks since Lorenz had written to him, and he'd been so preoccupied that he'd forgotten to expect a response. Abandoning the remains of his breakfast, Lorenz hurried out into the gardens to read the letter in private. </p><p>He drew off his gloves, then touched the seal with his thumb, and the letter sprang open in his lap. A simple trick, but useful nonetheless. He wilted somewhat, however, when he saw how short the missive was.</p><p>
  <i>Lorenz,</i>
</p><p>
  <i>My investigations into the mongrel's heritage continue, though with little success. It would behove you to gain his trust so that we might discover more about his origins. Failing any such revelation, a friendship would nevertheless enable us to put pressure on him.</i>
</p><p>
  <i>I trust that you shall not disappoint me.</i>
</p><p>
  <i>Leopold Friedrich Gloucester</i>
</p><p>Lorenz crumpled the letter in his fist, his breath coming hard and fast. He hadn't questioned his father's insistence that they attempt to discover more about Claude's true identity, and block him from assuming the leadership seat if necessary, but the thought of performing niceties, of gaining Claude's trust through subterfuge, made his stomach turn. Not to mention, there was little hope of him gaining Claude's favour when the boy could scarcely meet his eye after their unfortunate tryst in the stables. Moreover, Lorenz could not risk revealing himself to Claude any more than he already had, and he was certain that more close contact between them would only fuel Claude's never-ending curiosity. </p><p>With a sigh, Lorenz smoothed the letter out against his knee, then he held it up and ignited it with a whisper. The ashes blew away on the morning breeze, and Lorenz looked up into the overcast sky as he tried to think of a way around his conundrum. </p><p>As he sat pondering, the door to the dining hall opened and Claude stepped out into the brisk morning air, with Hilda half a step behind him. Where he sat, Lorenz was mostly hidden by the overhanging foliage. He disliked the thought of spying on them, but by the time he recognised them, it was already too late to announce his presence. He peeked out at them through the branches, trying to judge when he might make his escape, only to witness—to his frustration—the two stop to talk mere feet away. </p><p>"You never met Lysithea before you came to the academy?" Claude asked, his tone idle.</p><p>"No," Hilda said, twirling a strand of hair between her fingers. "Why? You're not interested in her, are you?"</p><p>Claude laughed, warm and false. "Maybe I am, does that make you jealous?"</p><p>Hilda flicked her hair and huffed. "Painfully jealous."</p><p>"That's too bad," Claude soothed, "because I was hoping you could tell me more about her."</p><p>"Mm...what's in it for me?"</p><p>He laughed again. "You tell me. I was just wondering if she always had hair like that. It's rather unusual, don't you think?"</p><p>"Oh, <i>that</i>," Hilda said in a sniffy tone. "Well I never knew Lysithea, but none of her siblings had hair like that. And <i>Lorenz</i>  certainly didn't used to look like that, but maybe he thought it was fashionable and copied Lysithea."</p><p>Lorenz was unable to stifle a gasp; did people truly believe he'd done this to himself on <i>purpose</i>? Indignant rage poured over him, and Lorenz clenched his fists tightly in his lap. </p><p>"Ah, so you knew Lorenz when he was younger?"</p><p>Hilda shrugged. "Not well, but we met a few times, at balls and whatnot. His hair used to be purple, like his father's." She gave an unlady-like snort. "Lorenz was like a perfect little copy of the Count. Just as pompous and rude."</p><p>Claude made a thoughtful sound. "You should be careful what you say," he said, his light tone belying his words. "You never know who's listening."</p><p>"Oh, psh," Hilda hissed, waving a dismissive hand. "Nobody's listening. And if they were, they wouldn't <i>care</i>."</p><p>Lorenz gritted his teeth. His nails were cutting uncomfortably into his palms. </p><p>"Since when are you springing to his defense anyway?" Hilda asked, an edge creeping into her tone, making it clear she thought she'd identified a weak spot. "I thought you and Lorenz couldn't stand one another?"</p><p>"What gave you that idea?" Claude asked, feigning innocence. </p><p>"Well, you're always at each other's throats, for a start."</p><p>Claude laughed. "Well, I can't say that I've had <i>extensive</i>  dealings with Count Gloucester, but if I had to choose between them, I can happily say that I'd sooner treat with Lorenz any day."</p><p>"Well, really," Lorenz muttered under his breath, scowling. He wasn't sure what irritated him more: the suggestion that his father was somehow untrustworthy, or Claude's backhanded compliment. If he hadn't thought himself well-hidden, Lorenz might almost have thought Claude was saying it just to toy with him.</p><p>"Oh?" Hilda asked coyly. "Does that make you two <i>friends</i>  now?"</p><p>Claude's laughter was altogether too loud. "I think that might be stretching things." He sighed. "No, Lorenz doesn't think highly of me anymore than I do of him."</p><p>Lorenz stiffened, staring down at the ground. Claude’s point of view was expected, really, they’d made no secret of their tempestuous dealings with one another. But he hadn’t realised that Claude had such a low opinion of him. Of <i>Gloucester</i>.</p><p>Well. Lorenz would show him just what a miscalculation he'd made there.</p><p>Irritably, Lorenz waved away a fly that landed on his cheek, making his skin itch. However, the tingling feeling remained even after he'd shooed the fly away. He gritted his teeth, trying to ignore it; Claude and Hilda had drifted closer to his hiding spot, and he couldn't risk giving himself away at this stage, not when he'd heard so much. Still, it was difficult to focus, his palms now buzzing with the same, itchy sensation. </p><p>“Besides,” Claude said, snapping Lorenz's attention back to the conversation. “You know how...rigid he can be. It would take more than little old me to change his position on, well, <i>me</i>.” </p><p>Lorenz fumed as he squirmed and wrestled with the necessity to be still. Glancing through the foliage, he was relieved to see that Claude had his back to him, and watched as he rubbed the back of his neck slowly, unconsciously ruffling his hair. Something about the sight made the buzzing in his own veins worse, but Lorenz didn't dare stir. Despite the bias in them, these insights would be invaluable if he was ever to navigate a working relationship with Claude. </p><p>"What's the matter with you?" Hilda asked suddenly.</p><p>Claude huffed. "Nothing. Just a little warm."</p><p>"Warm? It's freezing out here!" </p><p>"It's not that bad," Claude said, laughing. He moved closer, putting his arm around Hilda's shoulders. "Though I forget what a delicate flower you are."</p><p>Hilda chuckled. "That's right," she said in a sniffy tone, and the two began to walk away toward the Knight's Hall. "You should be nicer to me."</p><p>Their bickering voices faded as they crossed the garden, and Lorenz sagged with relief, leaning back against the bench. His lap was still sprinkled with ashes from his father's letter, and he brushed them away as he stood, although he waited until he was sure that Claude and Hilda would be out of sight before he emerged. The knowledge that Claude would sooner speak with him than his father did little to reassure him about the possibility of friendship between them; it was clear that Claude viewed him as little more than the lesser of two evils. With the burden of his father's expectations heavy upon his mind, Lorenz shook himself and made his way to class.</p><p> </p><p>—</p><p> </p><p>While Claude seemed determined to stay out of his way, Lysithea suddenly seemed to be everywhere he went, as though she were haunting him. Lorenz sensed her watching him each time he visited the library, or while he ate his meals. He greeted her with a polite smile when their eyes met, and tried to ignore the intensity in her own gaze. He was dimly aware that Lysithea and her parents had had some involvement with the mages who'd gifted him his second crest, but it was a topic he had no great desire to discuss.</p><p>There was, however, nothing to be done when she approached him in the dining hall near the end of their evening meal. </p><p>"Lorenz," she said, fixing him with her cool, perceptive gaze. "I would like to talk with you."</p><p>Lorenz concealed a sigh and lowered his book, marking the page with a finger. "I am at your service, Lysithea."</p><p>She gave him a slow, considering look, tilting her head to one side. "Your hair," she said at last. "Did you dye it, or did something else change it?"</p><p>Lorenz's eyes widened, and he stifled a sharp inhale as he called up the careful script he kept in the back of his mind in preparation for such questions. "Sadly, the stresses of studying at the School of Sorcery were unparalleled when coupled with my duties as the heir of Gloucester," he said in a rather expansive tone. "In fact, I was forced to withdraw early, no doubt a great loss for modern magic."</p><p>"Oh, to be sure," Claude put in loudly from across the table. "Who's going to invent the first spell to banish blemishes if not Lorenz Hellman Gloucester?"</p><p>Refusing to be baited, Lorenz only turned his nose up and answered archly, "You jest, Claude, but the debutantes of Fódlan—not to mention their mothers—would likely pay a small fortune for such a spell."</p><p>Claude's eyes glittered. "Well, I hope the Alliance council never finds itself in urgent need of funds. What will we do without your spellcraft to save us?"</p><p>Lorenz looked away from him with a huff, and found Lysithea still watching him with patient intensity. "Ah...Lysithea." He smiled weakly. "I see you are not to be discouraged. Perhaps we might walk together, the weather is particularly—"</p><p>"Fine," she said, getting up from her seat at the table.</p><p>Together they left the dining hall, and Lorenz subtly steered them away from the small clusters of students in the gardens to a quiet space beside the dormitories. </p><p>"So, I believe you were interested in my time in Fhirdiad?" he prompted.</p><p>Lysithea shook her head, folding her arms as she appraised him. "Do you really expect me to believe a little bit of studying turned your hair white?"</p><p>"That <i>would</i>  be the polite course of action on your part," Lorenz said a little stiffly.</p><p>She huffed, and narrowed her eyes at him. "It happened to you too, didn't it? Those people, with their...experiments."</p><p>Lorenz's book fell from his hand, landing in the dirt with a thump. "Oh, I—forgive me," he said, bending down to retrieve it.</p><p>"I was told they'd left the Alliance."</p><p>"Yes, I—I was sent away to Adrestia." </p><p>Lysithea's eyes widened. "So they're not confined to Alliance territory." She looked away, clenching her jaw. "I'm...sorry, Lorenz. I begged my parents to keep it secret, but maybe if I'd let it be known what happened to us, you wouldn't have had to suffer too."</p><p>Lorenz frowned, fidgeting with the book in his hands. "I don't know precisely what you mean. My father informed me that he'd found a way to make me stronger, more powerful, someone who could help shape the new Alliance. Naturally I agreed, and he withdrew me from school so I could be...remade."</p><p>Lysithea frowned up at him. "What are you saying?" She searched his face, her pale eyebrows drawing together. "The Count—do they hold power over him too? How far does their influence spread?"</p><p>Lorenz bristled. "Nobody holds power over Gloucester. Sending me to them was a strategic move on my father's part."</p><p>"You—you cannot mean he sent you to them on purpose?" she asked in a harsh whisper.</p><p>He eyed her, bemused. "Of course. As soon as we heard that Duke Riegan was to name an heir. I should have been the next successor, I—" Lorenz cut himself off, realising that he was becoming agitated. He took a deep breath, trying to settle his nerves, and continued more quietly. "I was meant to be the strongest—I <i>am</i>  the strongest candidate for the position. My father just wanted, ah...insurance."</p><p>Lysithea's expression had changed as he spoke, but only to slacken with horror, her pretty mouth falling open and her eyes widening. "Your father…<i>wanted</i>  them to experiment on you? And you—you went willingly?"</p><p>"It was necessary," Lorenz snapped, heat rising to his face. "I was the only one, I've been raised to take on this role since the moment I was born." He took another deep breath, a measured exhale. "I must succeed. For the good of the Alliance, you see?"</p><p>Lysithea drew back from him. "Is that all that matters to you?" she hissed, furious tears gathering in her eyes. "Getting to sit in the head seat? I watched my siblings torn apart one by one, and you call it <i>necessary</i>."</p><p>Lorenz's mouth opened, but he found that he had nothing to say in the face of Lysithea's admission. He closed his mouth again and swallowed thickly. She was still watching him, her face twisted with anger, her chest rising and falling sharply. "I am so sorry for your loss," he murmured, the words sounding hollow and meaningless to his own ears. "My own siblings are too young—it was necessary that I be the one to be sacri—that I be first." He closed his eyes, hanging his head briefly and placing his hand over his heart. "Forgive me, Lysithea. I did not intend to diminish your family's sacrifice. Truly, I—I had no idea you had suffered so." </p><p>"My parents were ashamed," she said, her voice very small. "We were taken from them by force. I—was the only one who survived."</p><p>He inclined his head slightly. "I...apologise if I sounded crass. Truly, had I known what awaited me...what you had experienced, perhaps—" He sighed and shook his head. "I cannot change it now, only deal with the consequences."</p><p>Lysithea fell quiet for several moments, biting her lip. Finally, she looked up at him again, speaking in a low voice. "Was it for a crest?"</p><p>His mouth tight, Lorenz nodded. </p><p>"Yes," she sighed. "Me too. I was born with a minor crest of Charon."</p><p>"And you...what is your second?" Lorenz asked softly. "If that's not too impertinent of me."</p><p>She finally showed a hint of amusement, a faint smirk touching her lips. "Ah...I thought you would have guessed. It's the major crest of Gloucester."</p><p>"Oh, no, I hadn't." Lorenz felt strangely unsettled by the knowledge that Lysithea not only carried his crest—his <i>true</i>  crest—but carried a stronger version of it. </p><p>"What of yours?" she asked, blinking up at him.</p><p>Lorenz swallowed. "I—forgive me, but I would prefer not to say."</p><p>Lysithea raised an eyebrow at him. "I'm not going to tell anyone."</p><p>"All the same." Lorenz cleared his throat. "It is...something I would rather not discuss."</p><p>"Hm." Lysithea tilted her head again, eyeing him curiously. "And after you were so keen to improve yourself." </p><p>Lorenz shook his head. "It may be an honour to represent the House of Gloucester as I do, but do not think for a moment that I enjoy bearing the additional weight of it."</p><p>Lysithea huffed. "Well, you're not a complete idiot I suppose." She sighed, planting one hand on her hip. "You know, I don't understand why you dislike Claude so much. It's not <i>his</i>  fault Duke Riegan named him heir."</p><p>"Perhaps not," Lorenz murmured, nose wrinkling. "Yet he is the one who chooses to behave in such a disrespectful manner toward his peers, and the office he holds as heir. It is almost as though he thinks the whole thing some sort of game. Not to mention that he seems wholly unqualified for the role. Does he even know anything about managing a country?"</p><p>Lysithea seemed surprised by his outburst, but she humoured him with a shrug. "Maybe. I don't know very much about him. He likes it that way, doesn't he?"</p><p>Lorenz heaved a sigh. "He does seem to take no uncertain amount of glee in it, yes."</p><p>She smirked. "You shouldn't let him tease you so."</p><p>"If only it were so simple, Lysithea. If only."</p><p> </p><p>—</p><p> </p><p>Several weeks slunk by, over which Lorenz tried reluctantly to put his father's instructions into action. He bit his tongue when Claude made jokes, and stifled his harsher words. He even attempted to draw Claude into conversation on one or two occasions, probing him about a particular historic battle they had studied that day, or seeking his opinion on political issues. No matter what he tried, Claude always answered him with the same veiled politeness, his smiles never reaching his eyes. Worse, his very presence made annoyance buzz beneath Lorenz's skin, making it hard to concentrate properly when he was near, let alone maintain the focus and determination necessary to win him over. </p><p>In his letters home, Lorenz carefully avoided expounding on his relationship—or lack thereof—with Claude, instead describing Claude's stubbornness, and placing what even he felt was a rather unfair emphasis on his dishonesty. It did, however, keep his father's expectations in check, and though his impatience grew between one letter and the next, he nevertheless directed the bulk of it at Claude, rather than at Lorenz for failing him.</p><p>The reprieve was fortunate, as Lorenz had dedicated himself to acquiring a new certification, study for which took up a great deal of his time and concentration. </p><p>It was several days before his certification exam was due to be held, and Lorenz had contrived to stay in the library past the usual hour that students were expected to be back in their dormitories. Once his eyes were too strained to read clearly any longer, he reluctantly gathered up his things and snuck out. He shied away from the guttering light of the torches as he crept across the moonlit courtyard. Wind swept across the cobblestones, rattling shutters and bringing with it the sound of footsteps, soft leather against stone.</p><p>"Who's there?" Lorenz demanded in a harsh whisper. "Show yourself!"</p><p>"...Lorenz?" Claude stepped out from the shadows, frowning a little in the moonlight. "What're you doing out here?"</p><p>Lorenz drew himself up stiffly. "I might ask you the same question. For my part, I was busy researching in the library, and didn't notice the time."</p><p>"Is that so?" Claude asked, smirking as he stepped closer. "Did the archivist on duty forget to check for stragglers, or did you secret yourself away between the stacks on the upper level so you could stay there a little longer?"</p><p>"Not all of us fill every spare moment of our day with subterfuge and trickery," Lorenz said sniffily. "Perhaps—"</p><p>"Hush," Claude whispered suddenly, moving close to him.</p><p>Lorenz instinctively took a step back, but Claude advanced again, pushing him against the wall. "Claude, what are you—"</p><p>Claude narrowed his eyes and held a finger to his lips, then looked around him. "Someone's coming," he breathed softly, and seized hold of Lorenz's wrist. "Hurry, follow me."</p><p>"I—!"</p><p>"Be quiet," Claude hissed, dragging him through the shadows like a dog on a leash. </p><p>Realising that his gloves were still in his pocket where he had doffed them for ease of reading, Lorenz was suddenly, horribly grateful for the fact that Claude had grabbed him over his uniform, and not by his bare wrist. </p><p>"Hurry!" Claude whispered over his shoulder.</p><p>"I'm trying, but your treatment of me as a child's pull toy does not exactly lend itself to—"</p><p>Claude whirled around, tugging Lorenz into a tight, dark alcove and pressing his forearm across Lorenz's mouth. "Unless you want stable duty with me again," he hissed, "I'd suggest you keep quiet." </p><p>Claude's voice was low, more of a breath than a whisper. Eyes wide, Lorenz nodded, trying in vain to shift away from the warm bulk of Claude's body leaning into him.</p><p>The darkness pressed in on them as they stood in silence, Claude's chest heaving against his own. Glancing out into the night, Lorenz noticed a small pool of light, accompanied by the sound of footsteps. Lorenz frowned, trying to place the soft, rhythmic step.</p><p>"Seteth," Claude whispered, very softly. His breath was warm against Lorenz's neck. </p><p>Lorenz nodded, suppressing a shiver at Claude's closeness. He'd never been caught out of bed after hours himself, but he'd heard stories from other students. He certainly wouldn't have put it past Seteth to instruct them to stable duty again, or far worse. Suddenly the footsteps halted, and the pool of light cast by Seteth's lantern moved from side to side, as though searching for them. Claude shifted subtly closer, and Lorenz held his breath. His skin felt too tight for his body: an uncomfortable, shivery sensation crawling over him.</p><p>Finally, after what felt like an age, Seteth's footsteps moved away, the light from the lantern retreating in the direction of the stables.</p><p>Claude finally let his arm drop to his side, and they both heaved sighs of relief.</p><p>"Goddess," Lorenz said, resting his head against the wall, his body still buzzing with adrenaline and what he'd come to realize was Claude's proximity. "He certainly sneaks around quite late." </p><p>Claude snickered softly. "Isn't that rather like the pot calling the kettle black? We are, after all, both out of our rooms after lights out."</p><p>"Some of us are trying to pass a very tricky exam," Lorenz harrumphed. "I have no doubt you have been spending your time in idle pursuit, practising subterfuge or thievery, or perhaps wyvern trick-riding again. I saw you at it the other day, you know. Such pageantry is hardly impressive." </p><p>"Oh?" Claude smirked at him. "And yet you apparently felt it worth mentioning." He pulled back a little, withdrawing his warmth, and leaned out of the alcove to check whether the coast was clear. </p><p>Lorenz shivered in the aftermath of Claude's retreat. "Do you think people don't notice when you deflect instead of answering their perfectly reasonable questions?"</p><p>"Was there a question?" Claude asked, leaning against the opposite wall. "I thought you just wanted to impugn my flying skills."</p><p>Lorenz huffed. "As if anything I say could have an effect on an ego like yours."</p><p>Claude shook his head. "My my, you really do know me better than I know myself."</p><p>"Poppycock," Lorenz said, rolling his eyes. "You take pains to ensure that nobody here can get to know you, and yet in the same breath you ask us to trust you." Realising that their words had become heated, that his own cheeks were warm, Lorenz sighed and turned his gaze aside. "Trust goes both ways, Claude. You cannot demand it of your companions while refusing to bestow it."</p><p>Claude watched him very carefully, his eyes shadowed. The silence stretched out between them, cold and dark, and when Claude finally spoke his voice was soft, but just as cold. "I am accustomed to being told my place by hypocritical old men," he murmured. He leaned closer again, placing his hand against the wall beside Lorenz's head, warm breath skipping over his chin. "Yet I still hoped for better from you." </p><p>Lorenz was startled when Claude's words cut him to the quick. He'd never sought Claude's good opinion, and yet hearing that the man thought so low of him made his stomach ill. He straightened, his jaw tight, and knocked Claude's hand aside with his forearm. "Perhaps those old men knew better," he spat. "As the future leader of a nation, you must learn to take criticism and judgmental opinions alike with the grace afforded to you by virtue of your station. Quite frankly, the way you speak over people and imply meaningful connotations that do not exist is an insult not only to the Alliance, but also to the person who schooled you in diplomacy."</p><p>"Oh, please," Claude murmured, his eyes flashing in the dim light, "tell me more about how wanting I am."</p><p>Lorenz stepped closer, unsure of whether the trembling in his hands was the result of Claude's nearness or his own rage. "If I thought it worth the breath in my lungs, I would, but I will not stand here and be lectured by someone who hasn't the slightest care for our nation's rich history of etiquette, and refuses to consider the consequences of flying in the face of it." He prodded Claude's chest with an ungloved finger. "You must do better." </p><p>Lorenz stepped away, cursing Claude's talent for stripping him of every ounce of composure. </p><p>Across from him, Claude's face was cold and hard. His gaze dropped to Lorenz's hands, which were clenched into fists at his sides. "You look cold, Lorenz," he said softly. "Perhaps you should put your gloves on."</p><p>"Ha!" Lorenz turned his back, and ducked out of the alcove. He paused for a moment, no clear destination in mind. He looked one way and then the other, trying to determine the swiftest and also safest route back to the dormitories. </p><p>Before he could escape, Claude called out softly behind him. "If you expect me to share my secrets, you might start by being honest about what happened to you."</p><p>Lorenz froze, his shoulders stiffening, pausing with his glove only halfway on. "I can't imagine what you mean."</p><p>"Oh no?" Claude asked, stalking closer. "I know that your appearance changed shortly before I came to live in my grandfather's house."</p><p>"That's none of your—"</p><p>"And I know that what happened between us in the hayloft was no mere heat of the moment encounter—"</p><p>Lorenz snorted. "Or perhaps you refuse to admit that you cannot control yourself."</p><p>"Oh?" Claude said, cruel laughter in his voice. "Are you claiming that I somehow took advantage of you?"</p><p>Lorenz's lip curled as he whirled around to face Claude. "It would not be the first time you showed up out of nowhere and ruined the path my life was meant to take." </p><p>Claude's eyes narrowed, but Lorenz turned on his heel before he could make any reply, and strode quickly across the courtyard toward the dormitories. Angry tears stung the corners of his eyes, but he blinked them away, refusing to allow himself to be affected by such a foolish disagreement.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>don't forget to tell us how much you love and cherish this delightful ship :3c</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Please see chapter end notes for specific chapter <b>warnings</b>!</p><p> </p><p>You can also see the fantastic art we commissioned of chapter one <a href="https://twitter.com/ghiralewd/status/1274689013941784577">here!!</a> (please note it's nsfw!)</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>There was a strange feeling in the air that day. Archbishop Rhea had been behaving oddly, and Lorenz couldn't help but notice that her insistence on visiting the Holy Tomb to receive some kind of divine message seemed to make Claude uncomfortable. He tried to raise it with Claude as they prepared for battle, but Claude only pretended not to understand him, and then there was no time left to continue the conversation before their presence was needed. </p><p>Lorenz didn't remember it until later that night, after Edelgard had been unmasked, and Lorenz had helped to carry an injured Raphael up to the infirmary. Claude came to his door as Lorenz was finally stripping off his armour and sweat-soaked clothing. He said nothing when Lorenz opened the door to him, and Lorenz found himself similarly lost for words. When Claude looked around shiftily before holding up an unopened bottle of wine, his delicate eyebrow quirked with a question, Lorenz only nodded and opened the door wider for him to step inside. </p><p>Closing the door behind him, Lorenz finished stripping off his soiled clothing, before pulling on a shirt and a pair of long johns, and finally his gloves. Thus attired, he joined Claude, who'd already made himself comfortable on Lorenz's bed. Claude passed him a cup of wine as he sat, and Lorenz accepted it gratefully. </p><p>"Cheers," Claude murmured, with none of his usual verve. </p><p>Lorenz frowned, and drank. </p><p>For several minutes they continued in silence. It wasn't quite a comfortable silence, but it was easier than putting words to his racing thoughts. The wine helped a little, dulling the hum in his veins that he felt whenever Claude was around. At last, however, Lorenz could bear the silence no longer, and he cleared his throat softly. </p><p>"Are we going to talk about what happened tonight?" he murmured, looking at Claude over the rim of his cup. "I know it is a—a vile thing to countenance, but the fact remains. We have been betrayed."</p><p>Claude looked aside, his face grim. "As a master of bending the truth myself, I have to hand it to the Princess. I don't think anyone had any idea." He paused, frowning. "Well, I have my suspicions about Dimitri, but that's neither here nor there."</p><p>Lorenz's eyes widened, startled both by the suggestion, and by Claude's sudden willingness to share his thoughts with him. "You suspect the Prince of being in league with—?"</p><p>"No, no," Claude said, shaking his head. "He's straight as an arrow, that one. But the way he reacted to the news, not to mention his...erratic behaviour of late. I suspect he may have had his suspicions about Edelgard's true identity."</p><p>"That's very generous of you." Lorenz sipped at his wine thoughtfully. "He looked almost…<i>unhinged</i>  when he heard the news. Of course we are all <i>surprised</i>, but nonetheless." He shook his head. "Such behaviour is quite unbecoming in a leader." </p><p>Claude sighed, resting his head against the wall. "Still playing that same old tune." </p><p>"I wasn't—" Lorenz shook his head. "My words were not directed at you. No leader ought to behave in such a manner, still less a future monarch."</p><p>"Mm, I don't know about that," Claude said in a thoughtful tone. "There have been plenty of mad Kings and Queens through the ages, and still the world trundles on."</p><p>Lorenz scoffed. "Perhaps there have, but I hasten to remind you that I never said the future king of Faerghus was mad."</p><p>"Oh, not at all," Claude said with a smile, clearly humouring him, "but I suppose I felt a moment of kinship with him, as the one usually bearing the brunt of your displeasure."</p><p>"Are you calling yourself mad now?" Lorenz asked archly.</p><p>Claude laughed. "No, just wondering how you would judge me, if this is how you judge a man in such distress."</p><p>Somewhat chastened, Lorenz sniffed and glanced aside. "The two are not the same." </p><p>"Oh?" Claude said, his smile widening as he scented weakness. "And yet you object to a great deal of my behaviour. What makes me so different from Dimitri?"</p><p>Lorenz narrowed his eyes. "You are trying to trap me into saying something foolish."</p><p>Claude smiled, and held up his hands. "No trap. I'm just curious."</p><p>"That curiosity will get you killed one of these days," Lorenz said shortly. "Now hush and drink your wine." </p><p>The silence between them was tense and heavy. But then Claude snorted, and when Lorenz cast him a sharp look, he started to giggle.</p><p>"Claude," Lorenz said, mouth twitching. "Now is hardly the time."</p><p>It was no use. Claude's giggles burst into laughter, and before he knew it Lorenz found himself laughing too, hysteria tugging at the edges of his mind. They both laughed, and laughed, Claude's eyes crinkled shut as he slumped sideways on the bed, clutching his stomach. Lorenz did his best to stay upright and avoid spilling his wine. After a few minutes they attempted to regain their composure, but as soon as they caught one another's eye, they collapsed into helpless giggles again. It wasn't even funny, Lorenz observed inwardly, in fact it was awful, and yet he couldn't seem to stop.</p><p>"Why—why on earth—are we—" Lorenz managed, weakly. "This is <i>not</i>  appropriate—" He finally composed himself enough to straighten up, while Claude did the same, wiping at his eyes. </p><p>"No, it isn't," Claude sighed. "But I don't know what else to do, Lorenz. Someone that we trusted, fought alongside..." He shook his head, grimacing. "I knew there was <i>something</i>  off about that girl, I just didn't think it was something this big." He glanced at Lorenz. "What do you know about the Princess?"</p><p>Lorenz startled, almost spilling his wine. "Me? No more than you, I'd wager. I'd never even met her before I came to Garreg Mach."</p><p>"But you have something in common, don't you?" Claude asked, leaning over to fix him with a sceptical look. </p><p>Lorenz's heart started to pound, and he found his mouth dry. His wet his bottom lip with his tongue. "What—what do you mean?"</p><p>"Well, as far as the Alliance goes, Gloucester are practically royalty," Claude said, frowning at him. "So tell me, what does someone like Edelgard have to gain from going against the Church? Is it just about power?"</p><p>"Oh. <i>That.</i>" He ignored Claude's sharp gaze for a moment as he puzzled through the problem. "That's difficult to say. Certainly if was about power, an assassination would be far quicker, though you would need the resources in place for a coup—which I suppose she has, hasn't she?" </p><p>Claude hummed noncommittally. </p><p>"In that case, she must have a certain part of her plan depend on all this pageantry." Lorenz frowned. "Something to rally the people behind... she's aware she must have public support for—well. For toppling the Church, I suppose. That way she becomes not only an Emperor, but a savior as well. She can paint history as she likes. It is decided by the victors, after all. And the survivors." </p><p>"What a poetic turn of phrase, Lorenz," Claude observed in a teasing voice, though his expression quickly turned serious again. "That doesn't explain it all though. Why this charade with the Flame Emperor? What of Remire? Not to mention the agents that were planted at Garreg Mach—Tomas and Monica." He sighed, slumping in his seat. "None of it makes <i>sense</i>."</p><p>Lorenz hummed softly as he considered Claude's words. "A means to and end perhaps. A way to keep us distracted, and also gain a little strength to oppose us."</p><p>"Maybe," Claude sighed, though he seemed unconvinced. "It's just so clumsy, all of it. I see little of Hubert's deft machinations, and little enough of Edelgard's brute force. Just a string of cruel events that don't string together." He groaned, putting a hand to his face and pressing his thumb and forefinger into his temples. "There is something here I'm not seeing."</p><p>"We must also consider that Tomas and Monica could be part of a larger whole. Perhaps there are other entities at play that have yet to reveal themselves."</p><p>Claude frowned. "You mean that perhaps Edelgard herself is wrapped up in something larger?"</p><p>"It would certainly explain a great deal. Not to mention that they would be fools to reveal all their cards at once."</p><p>"Mm."</p><p>For several moments, Lorenz watched him quietly; Claude seemed suddenly older than he had that morning, more sombre. After a moment he raised his head, and Lorenz cleared his throat. "We shall take some time to regroup. No doubt Edelgard and her supporters will be forced to do the same after being unmasked in such a fashion, so we shall have some time."</p><p>Claude laughed weakly. "I never thought I'd be starting my time on the council in the midst of a war."</p><p>"Nor I," Lorenz replied with a quirk of his lips. </p><p>Distantly, the cathedral bells began to chime the hour. Claude sighed and dragged his hand over his face. "It's getting late. I ought to leave you to rest."</p><p>Lorenz nodded. "It's been a long day." He stood, and offered a hand to Claude. </p><p>Claude reached out, placing his hand in Lorenz's, though he made no effort to stand. Instead he looked up at Lorenz with an unreadable look on his face, not quite a smile, not quite anything else. "These gloves," he said, his voice soft. "Were you trying to hide it from me, or from yourself?"</p><p>Lorenz snatched his hand away. "I don't know what you mean." He cleared his throat. "Goodnight, Claude."</p><p>One of Claude's eyebrows lifted a fraction, but he said nothing, only gathered up the half-empty bottle and slipped out of the room. </p><p>Lorenz slammed the door behind him, then pressed his back to the wood, slipping down until he hit the floor.</p><p> </p><p>—</p><p> </p><p>Lorenz's horse whinnied shrilly in the frigid morning air as he led her out of her stable, saddled for war. He had thought himself prepared for an event of this magnitude—certainly one with higher stakes than the glorified housekeeping of keeping bandits under control. But in actuality, his heart was in his throat as he paraded through the monastery gates with a grim host of soldiers and battalions. </p><p>"Lorenz—!" came a cry from above. "Ho there—Lorenz!" </p><p>Lorenz put a hand over his eyes: there, in the sky, Claude and his wyvern made great swooping, lazy circles. With a huff of laughter, Lorenz made his way out of the throng of soldiers to an empty patch of grass, watching as Claude's wyvern landed with a flurry of wingbeats. </p><p>"Looks like it's about that time," Claude said, sliding off Carras's back. His tone was cheerful, but Lorenz was not fooled. In the weeks since the tomb invasion—in which time they had become something like, if not quite, friends—Lorenz had become aware of the tightness in the corners of Claude's eyes when he was sidestepping a question, and the way his false smile showed more teeth than the real, lopsided one. </p><p>"Quite astute of you," Lorenz said drily, patting his mare on the neck as he dismounted. "Was it the armies that gave it away?" </p><p>Claude's smile turned into a smirk, though he was still paler than usual. "Something like that. Listen—I wanted to tell you, you know...good luck." </p><p>He extended his hand, and Lorenz's skin lit up with easy vibrations. With a tilt of his head, he took Claude's hand and shook it, bowing. "I'd like to extend the same offer to you. I have several debates in which I require an opposing point of view in order to be completely satisfied."</p><p>"And I would hate to leave you unsatisfied," Claude said, with a wink that made heat rush to the back of Lorenz's neck. </p><p>"Really," Lorenz huffed, hiding his smile as he reached out to pat his mare's shoulder. "Do you intend to fight our enemy, or merely flirt with them?"</p><p>Claude laughed. "Don't underestimate the effect my flirting can have on someone."</p><p>"I shouldn't dare."</p><p>An awkward silence fell, and they stood quietly for several moments in each other's company, neither wanting to acknowledge why they stood there, or the very real possibility that they might be turning their weapon on a classmate before the day was out. </p><p>"Don't look so gloomy," Claude said eventually, and smiled at him as he reached up to grasp the harness of his wyvern. "We'll be arguing again before the day is out, I promise."</p><p>"Be careful out there, Claude von Riegan!" Lorenz called to him crossly, as Claude swung himself back up into his saddle with alarming agility. "The Alliance still has need of you!" </p><p>Claude laughed, more genuinely this time. "Speak for yourself, Gloucester!" With that, he was away, his wyvern leaping into the skies and wheeling over the battlements to join the troops massing below. </p><p>Donning his helmet and gauntlets, Lorenz mounted his horse once more and directed her down through the crowded streets, following the press of soldiers down through the town below. He found his battalion quickly, and then passed an hour or two idle, nerves growing by the minute, as they waited for the battle to begin. </p><p>As the morning drew on, the ant-like trail of enemy soldiers making their way up the mountain increased from a wavering line to a steady pour. Lorenz blotted the sweat from his brow and bit his lip. The colours of the empire blazed along the ridge, like a line of fire hemming them in. </p><p>Finally, they were all assembled. Lorenz looked over his shoulder, seeking out the winged battalion, but they were currently out of view. Marianne and Leonie sat to either side of him, separated by several lines of soldiers and cavalry. Marianne's eyes were closed, her hands clasped in silent prayer, but Leonie met his gaze and nodded slowly. </p><p>A cry went up from below, and then like a wave breaking, a rush of soldiers spilled over the ridge and charged directly towards them. </p><p><i>This was it.</i> </p><p>"Take care, Rohais. I will not let this be the last time we ride together." His mare snorted as he patted her withers.</p><p>Raising a gauntleted hand, Lorenz spurred her forward and signalled his battalion to meet the enemy forces with the hot clang and clash of metal against metal.</p><p>In some ways, Lorenz would reflect later, it was not as harrowing as battles he'd been in during school. For bandits, capture meant death by hanging. These soldiers did not fight to save their own skins, and it was clear that some were not wholly convinced of their reason for turning against the Church. </p><p>Lorenz cursed as a soldier grabbed his stirrup, attempting to pull him from the saddle, and made his mare rear. The circle of soldiers fell back from her sharp hooves, and he ran two through with his lance before letting go of the reins for a brief moment to cast a spell at an enemy mage. </p><p>Rohais fell back on all fours heavily and Lorenz wheeled her around, cutting through a man who wielded a pair of hand axes, and shouting a spell which caused three to burst into flames. </p><p>The gorge rose in Lorenz's throat at the scent of charred meat, and he swallowed heavily several times, stifling his sobs. </p><p>It took him longer than he liked to fight his way through the knot of soldiers surrounding him—to say nothing of his battalion—but all activity ceased for a moment as an unholy screech rent the air. </p><p>A shadow and a hush fell across the battlefield as all eyes turned upward, jaws dropping at the sight of a great white dragon soaring down the ridge from the monastery. </p><p>"What on <i>earth...</i>?"</p><p>"Lorenz!" </p><p>Claude's wyvern landed with a thud, crumpling several soldiers under her claws. "What are you <i>doing</i>?"</p><p>"Where did <i>that</i>  come from?" Claude shouted.</p><p>Lorenz was shaking his head, still stunned by the sight of the dragon overhead. "Is it—on our side?" </p><p>Claude opened his mouth to respond, but whatever he said was lost below the sound of another deafening roar, so loud that it knocked half of Lorenz's battalion flat. </p><p>Rohais gave a startled bray and tried to leap back. In her haste and surprise, she lost her footing, and Lorenz released a startled breath when he felt her slip, throwing his weight heavily to one side. Rohais screamed, and looking down, Lorenz saw that her ankle had become trapped in a crack that had opened up in the ground. </p><p>Leaping from her back, Lorenz tried to get close to free her, but the pain, combined no doubt with the presence of a dragon of all things, had undone all her usual stoicism, and she bucked and twisted, knocking him aside. Lorenz fell heavily on his rump, losing his helmet in the tumble. Uttering a rare curse word, he stumbled to his feet, the haze of battle moving him despite his terror, but no sooner had he found his feet than the earth began to shake beneath him, bringing him to his knees. </p><p>Rohais screamed again as the earth shifted, and then there was a horrifying wet crack, and the sound of rending flesh as her leg was ripped off at the knee. </p><p>"R-Rohais!" Lorenz screamed, lifting himself up on bruised hands and knees. "Oh, Goddess..."</p><p>He saw none of the carnage surrounding him as he staggered to his feet and unsheathed the knife from his boot, dashing away his tears with his other hand. He didn't hear the yells of the soldiers falling into the same crack that had maimed his mount, nor the panicked shouts of Claude as Lorenz stumbled forward, intent only on taking away Rohais's pain. </p><p>The whites of her eyes rolled wildly as she tossed her head, but she calmed slightly under Lorenz's touch. "Darling," he whispered, falling to his knees again as the bloody ground pitched and yawned under his feet. </p><p>"—enz, what are you doing, you're going to fall in—!" </p><p>A strong wind almost bowled him over as the sound of leathery wings filled his ears. Cursing, Lorenz readied another spell, and then gasped as Claude heaved him atop his wyvern. The knife fell off to the side as Claude urged his wyvern into the air again, and Lorenz writhed against his chest, scrabbling at Claude's strong arm across his waist.</p><p>"No!" Lorenz screamed, leaning over to watch as the ground dropped away. "I have to help her!"</p><p>"You'll die, don't be an imbecile!"</p><p>Lorenz thrashed against him, his eyes blurred with tears. "Take me back to her, please—!"</p><p>"Lorenz—" Claude groaned, wrestling to keep Lorenz seated. </p><p>"I can't let her suffer!"</p><p>Claude gritted his teeth. Then, he reached for the quiver at his back, and cursed under his breath. </p><p>"How many do you have left?"</p><p>"Three," Claude said, already drawing one out. He tugged on his wyvern's rein, bringing him around again, then he grasped Lorenz's forearm, and pushed the reins into his hand. "Cover me."</p><p>Lorenz blinked. "What—" he began, but by the time he'd spoken, Claude was already moving, removing his feet from his stirrups and unhooking the carabiner from his belt. He wound one of the saddle's leather thongs around his arm, then in one smooth movement, he slipped down the wyvern's flank, and nocked the arrow to his bow. </p><p>"Steady, Carras!" Claude shouted, taking aim. </p><p>Wind rushed past them, the sounds of the battle seeming far away. Lorenz watched, his heart in his throat, as Claude drew his bow, and a heartbeat later loosed the arrow. Clutching at the reins, Lorenz leaned over Carras's side, but the ground was a blur to him. He couldn't even pick out Rohais's dark form amidst the confusion.</p><p>"Did you get her?" he cried. The moment seemed to last forever, Lorenz clinging to the reins, and Claude clinging to the side of the saddle, his untidy mop of hair being dragged every which way by the wind. "Claude?"</p><p>Claude lifted his head, his expression grim. "I got her. Straight to the heart." </p><p>Lorenz exhaled heavily. "Oh, Saints above," he sighed, as Claude started to climb back into the saddle. "Thank you—"</p><p>But before Claude could clip himself back into the saddle with his carabiner, a sudden fiery blast of magic roared up from below, and glanced off Carras's left wing. The wyvern banked heavily, and the sudden jolt, coming just at the wrong moment, knocked Claude free of the creature's back. Lorenz caught a glimpse of Claude's startled face, his pretty eyes wide, mouth open in silent shock.</p><p>"Claude!" </p><p>Looping his arm through Carras' reins, Lorenz threw himself across the saddle's seat and grasped wildly for Claude's arm. His hand met empty space for a brief, heart-stopping moment, but then his hand found Claude's wrist, and he grabbed for it as tightly as he could. He heard a sickening <i>pop</i>, followed by a grunt of pain from Claude. </p><p>Gritting his teeth, Lorenz grabbed Claude's other hand, shushing Carras as the reins tugged his snout to the side. "Just—hold on—ah—steady, Carras, that's it -" </p><p>Claude looked up at him as the ground rushed past, fear pinching his features. He grabbed Lorenz's wrist with his good arm and held on as Carras steadied, and Lorenz winced at his crushing grip. </p><p>"Up you go," Lorenz said, pitching his voice over the rush of the wind. He pulled Claude up, leaning back as far as he dared until Claude could get a foot in the stirrup and pull himself the rest of the way up, settling in front of Lorenz. </p><p>With shaking hands, Lorenz clipped the carabiner to the front of Claude's belt. "Your arm," he cried in Claude's ear, gripping the reins. "Broken?" </p><p>Claude shook his head, his braid hitting Lorenz in the mouth. "Out of joint," he called back. He used his good arm to fasten a second carabiner to Lorenz's belt. "You—no, listen, where in Sothis' name are you going?" </p><p>"I'm taking you to the healers' tents, acquiring a fresh mount, then rejoining the battle," Lorenz said grimly, steering Carras in a wide circle. "We've no idea the outcome as of yet." </p><p>"Lorenz, there's a damned <i>dragon</i>  out there, I'm pretty sure the outcome is settled!" </p><p>"I will not have us lose," Lorenz snapped. "And you require medical attention."</p><p>"I said it's not broken," Claude said impatiently. "I can still—"</p><p>"What?" Lorenz demanded. "Are you going to draw your bow with your teeth? Stop being so Saints-damned stubborn, for once in your life, and—"</p><p>"Alright!" Claude roared, reaching past him to snatch the reins. "Carras! Home!" </p><p>The struggling wyvern grunted, then wheeled around unsteadily, circling them back toward the lines of defence set up at the base of the town. Lorenz sagged with relief—as much as he could when sitting backwards and unsecured on the back of a wyvern—and closed his eyes briefly. He could still hear the sound of Claude's arm snapping out of joint, the noise of Rohais's leg being wrenched off, the screams of soldiers being baked alive inside their armour by the dragon's fearsome breath. When he finally opened his eyes again, Claude was stoic and grey-faced in front of him, his gaze carefully turned away to avoid meeting Lorenz's eyes. He must have been in pain, and Lorenz felt suddenly guilty that his own carelessness had brought Claude into the heat of the fighting. </p><p>They landed a minute later, and despite his arm hanging uselessly at his side, Claude leapt from Carras's back before Lorenz had even realised they'd landed. When he climbed down, more slowly and clumsily than Claude's effortless dismount, Claude was already inspecting Carras's injured wing, and shouting for one of the beast wranglers to help him treat the wound. Lorenz drew himself up wearily and marched over to Claude on trembling legs.</p><p>"Claude, you need a healer."</p><p>"Gods damn it, Lorenz, in a minute—"</p><p>"I see someone coming now, Carras will be well looked after. <i>You</i>  on the other hand look as though you're about to faint."</p><p>Claude pulled away from him, spewing forth a particularly colourful string of insults that might have made Lorenz blush on another day, but when it became clear that someone was indeed hurrying over to attend to his wyvern, he sighed and finally drew away with a last fond pat of the creature's snout.</p><p>"Come," Lorenz said, putting an arm around Claude's shoulders to shepherd him in the right direction. </p><p>Once he'd deposited Claude in the healers' tent, with strict instructions that he was to be watched at all times, lest he slip away before he was mended, Lorenz headed back out toward the field. His battalion had been left behind when Claude scooped him out of the dirt, but he managed to find a riderless horse that didn't shy too badly when he approached. He rubbed his hand over the beast's sweaty flank, then mounted slowly, wary of startling the creature. He was too tall for the mid-sized mare, and the stirrups were far too short, but he rode without them, tucking his heels close into the mare's sides as he urged her across the empty field to where their lines of attack began. </p><p>Hefting his borrowed lance, Lorenz made his way back toward the place he'd lost Rohais. The ground was shattered, and here and there, Lorenz saw the distinctive uniform of his battalion of mages on fallen bodies. There was no sign of Rohais, but he trusted that Claude had dispatched her as he promised. Clicking his tongue, Lorenz urged his borrowed mare toward the front line, from whence still came the clash of steel, and the unholy, echoing roar of the dragon.</p><p>Lorenz took down a few stragglers who'd been cut off from the main forces, running several through with his lance, and eviscerating another with a flick of his hand and a few muttered words. The further he went from the rear lines, the more sluggish he began to feel. His weapon arm was heavy and weak, but he pressed on, unwilling to leave his classmates to fight and die alone. He saw again in the distance the bloody, scarlet glimmer of Edelgard's standard, and his lip curled at the sight of it. The rage brought a surge of energy to him, and he urged the horse on, although he could feel her flagging. </p><p>Before he could reach the enemy line, a deafening sound rent the air, making the horse scream and rear up. Lorenz tossed his lance aside and clung on to the pommel of the saddle, almost losing his seat entirely with no stirrups to cling to. The roar didn't come from the dragon, but from the air itself, like a clap of thunder. And then Lorenz felt again the ground began to roil beneath his feet. This time, thankfully, he was far away from the epicentre of it, but he watched in horror as a great tear split the ground right across the line of engagement where the worst of the fighting was happening. Countless soldiers on both sides pitched into the blackness, and with another sound like a thunderclap but in reverse, the great white dragon suddenly vanished from the field. </p><p>At that, someone finally signalled for retreat, and Lorenz watched as both sides slowly drew apart from one another. The battle, it seemed, was over.</p><p> </p><p>—</p><p> </p><p>A great deal of confusion followed the battle, not least because the battlefield had become so treacherous as a result of the shifting earth. The disruption made it difficult for ground troops to navigate, and their limited aerial troops spent the evening busily going to and fro, rescuing the wounded, and those who'd become stranded. </p><p>As he was unharmed beyond some bruising and a superficial gash on his thigh, Lorenz dedicated himself to assisting with the relief effort, and it was late by the time he was able to stop in and check on Claude. He'd long since left the healers' tent by the time Lorenz arrived, but with a little effort and guesswork, Lorenz was soon able to track him down in the eyrie, feeding and rubbing down the exhausted wyverns. </p><p>Lorenz cleared his throat as he stepped over the threshold and up to the stall where Carras had been stabled. Claude was inside, slumped against the wall with his head on his chest, though his eyes flicked open the moment Lorenz approached. They stared at one another for a few, breathless moments, then Claude exhaled heavily.</p><p>"Lorenz," he said in a hoarse voice. His arm was in a sling, and he was clearly stiff from sitting, but he cleared the cobwebs of sleep from his throat and got to his feet with most of his usual dexterity. Lorenz watched him, his own words stuck in his throat, feeling only relief to see that Claude was as he'd left him. He didn't move as Claude strode across the stall, flinging the door open, then grabbing for him with his uninjured arm and pressing his face into Lorenz's neck.</p><p>"O-oh," Lorenz gasped, staggering as his entire body lit up with sparks, warm and cold at the same time. He returned the embrace eagerly, and sighed as his weariness and discomfort sloughed away, the warmth of Claude's face against his neck transforming the buzzing in his veins to a pleasant tingle. </p><p>The embrace lasted only a few moments, before a clatter in the courtyard outside made them startle apart from one another, the warmth slipping away as their hands fell back to their sides. Lorenz swallowed, his throat dry. "Claude..."</p><p>Claude's face hardened as he stepped back, draping himself against the stall door to fix Lorenz with a hard stare. "I suppose I ought to thank you for saving my life."</p><p>Lorenz cleared his throat. "It was no more than you did for me. Please do not consider yourself indebted—"</p><p>"Did you find your glory out there?"</p><p>Lorenz stared at him. "I—what?"</p><p>Claude's smile was brittle and dangerous, like shattered glass. "Isn't that why you left me here? So that you could go out there and make a name for—"</p><p>"How dare you?" Lorenz hissed, starting to tremble. "I went back out there to <i>help</i>. How <i>dare</i>  you question my honour—my dedication to this school, to my <i>people</i>—"</p><p>"Alright, alright," Claude sighed, holding up his hand. "I apologise, that was beneath me."</p><p>Lorenz frowned. Despite their frequent clashes, the casual bickering that formed the bedrock of their relationship, Claude was rarely angry. It was a particular annoyance for Lorenz, who often felt like a mouse getting toyed with, rather than an equal partner in a debate, and he made himself stop and consider what could have angered Claude to such a degree.</p><p>"Your battalion," he said, speaking more quietly. "Are they—"</p><p>"All dead," Claude muttered, shaking his head. "Yours?"</p><p>Lorenz nodded stiffly. "All but one."</p><p>"My condolences."</p><p>"And to you." The silence descended once more, and Lorenz wetted his bottom lip before continuing, "Are you alright?"</p><p>Claude snorted. "Aye. Those healers you left me with threatened to tie me to the bed if I stirred before they were finished with me."</p><p>Lorenz grimaced. "I didn't mean for them to take me quite so literally."</p><p>A faint quirk of Claude's eyebrow was the limit of his reaction to that. "Yes you did."</p><p>"Yes, I did," Lorenz admitted, sighing. "But you're alive, are you not?"</p><p>Claude's eyes narrowed. "And I am grateful, as I've said." His tone was cold, his shoulders tense despite his relaxed pose. It was clear that he was still annoyed, though about what, Lorenz couldn't tell. </p><p>"You don't seem it," Lorenz said coolly. "Perhaps I should have let you fall off of Carras' back and martyr yourself for the cause. I'm sure you'd do great work for Fódlan, and the Alliance, shrouded and entombed."</p><p>"It's always about the Alliance," Claude said, throwing up his hand in exasperation. </p><p>"In case you hadn't noticed, we are now at war," Lorenz replied, his voice getting louder despite his attempts to keep it level. "This is bigger than you and I."</p><p>Claude clenched his jaw. "A war which I intend to fight in."</p><p>Lorenz nodded. "I know." He swallowed again; his throat was scorched. "And I shall be by your side, for better or worse."</p><p>They looked at one another for several moments, the tension quivering between them. Then, to his annoyance, Claude snorted with laughter. He doubled over with it, his face crumpling with joy.</p><p>"What on earth is so funny?"</p><p>Claude grinned at him, still chuckling. "Was that—a proposal—Lorenz?"</p><p>Lorenz coloured. "D-don't be absurd!"</p><p>"Are you sure?" Claude asked. "Because I must say, I like a little romance first."</p><p>"You are unfailingly ridiculous," Lorenz shot back, although a faint smile tugged at the corner of his mouth. </p><p>Claude laughed again. "I know." He held out his hand, offering it to Lorenz. "It's not a proposal, but I shall be glad to fight, knowing you fight beside me."</p><p>Lorenz cleared his throat. "And I." He grasped Claude's wrist, and they held each other's gaze for several moments. </p><p>Behind them, Carras snorted suddenly, shifting around in the straw, and Claude released Lorenz's arm so that he could go over to him. </p><p>"Do you...need anything?" Lorenz asked, watching Claude bend down to examine the wyvern's injured wing. </p><p>Claude shook his head. "Nothing. Get some rest, Lorenz." He looked up, smiling grimly. "We're at war now, remember?"</p><p>"I recall. Well...goodnight, Claude."</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p><b>Warning:</b> Please be aware that this chapter contains some animal injury and death in the context of a battle.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Chapter 4</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>thank you for your lovely words and encouragement so far!! we're so glad you're enjoying the story!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"—for the last time, Claude, your position is wholly untenable."</p><p>"I know you take pleasure in disagreeing with me, Lorenz, but you can't win every argument just by stating that my own is flawed. At some point—"</p><p>Lorenz scoffed. "Very well," he interrupted. "Then allow me to demonstrate precisely <i>how</i>  your argument is the most moth eaten rag I have ever—"</p><p>They were interrupted by a sharp rap on the door. Both scowled at one another, then turned and frowned at the door instead.</p><p>"Come in!" they both called in unison, and returned to glaring at one another. </p><p>A servant stepped inside, wearing the livery of House Riegan. "I beg your pardon, my Lord," he said, bowing to Claude. Then, as an afterthought, to Lorenz. "My Lords."</p><p>"It's alright, what is it?" Claude asked. </p><p>The boy looked as though he'd seen a ghost, his face pale and grim. "It's—the Duke, my Lord."</p><p>Claude's eyes widened, and then he hurried from the room without so much as a backward glance, calling over his shoulder for Lorenz to forgive him for cutting their meeting short. </p><p>The servant lingered after he'd left, and Lorenz cleared his throat. "What of the Duke?"</p><p>The boy fidgeted on the spot. "Beg pardon, but I was told to deliver my message only to—"</p><p>"Well you already began it while I was here," Lorenz said impatiently, "so I might as well have the rest of it."</p><p>"The Duke, my Lord," the boy said, grimacing. "He's dead."</p><p>"Oh, good gracious," Lorenz said, lifting his head to look out into the empty hallway, quiet now that Claude had gone. He noticed the servant hovering awkwardly, and dismissed him before sinking into a chair. Duke Riegan had been leading the Alliance since before Lorenz was born, but his health had been declining over the past few years, hence Count Gloucester's insistence that Lorenz be prepared to step up once the time came. </p><p>He felt curiously numb at the news; it was somewhat anticlimactic, both as it had been expected, and because the Duke's passing no longer meant an opportunity for Lorenz, but another instance in which he was expected to step aside and make way for Claude. </p><p>Lorenz wasn't sure how long he sat there, but the shadows were long by the time he roused himself from the mire of his thoughts and called for some tea. He found that his nerves were distinctly unsettled, though he couldn't put his finger on what was causing it. Even the tea, once it arrived, did little to soothe him. Lorenz kept thinking of Claude's face when the servant broke the news; he'd seemed resigned, as if he'd known to expect it. Doubtless he had been, and yet something didn't sit right with Lorenz.</p><p>Finally he tired of trying to arrange his racing thoughts and got up, abandoning his cold tea and making his way to Claude's rooms. He half-expected Claude to be elsewhere, but instead he found the door standing ajar. He knocked softly, and inched the door open enough to glance around it.</p><p>Claude stood with his cousin Judith before the fire, their heads very close together, speaking in low voices as though they hadn't heard him. Lorenz was about to withdraw when Claude looked up, and greeted him with a tired smile.</p><p>"Lorenz. Is everything alright?"</p><p>Lorenz stepped into the room, licking his bottom lip. "I...simply came to see how you were."</p><p>Judith snorted. "Mind this one," she said to Claude, eyeing Lorenz with disdain. "I don't trust a Gloucester as far as I can throw him."</p><p>Claude hummed. "I'll keep it in mind," he said noncommittally. "Don't let me keep you, cousin."</p><p>"Mm. I'll see you tomorrow, boy."</p><p>Claude's mouth flattened, but he didn't protest the nickname for a change. Judith gripped his shoulder briefly, and Claude held her gaze for a moment before they parted. Lorenz bowed, but Judith didn't acknowledge him again as she strode over to the door, and closed it behind her.</p><p>"Sorry," Claude murmured, sounding odd and distant. "She's brisk even at the best of times."</p><p>"I’m not sure that maligning my family name can be adequately described as ‘brisk,’ but I’ll…" Lorenz trailed off, suddenly aware that a grieving Claude might not be receptive to their usual wordplay. "Well. It’s of no matter. She has her reasons, I’m sure."</p><p>Lorenz’s gaze roamed across Claude’s unusually still face. "Would you like to sit? Have a cup of tea? State matters can wait until you’ve collected yourself." Lorenz bit his lip. "Though if you would prefer solitude, I can—" </p><p>"No, no," Claude said softly, scrubbing a hand over his face in a burst of movement. "I'd appreciate some tea, thank you."</p><p>Lorenz busied himself with the elegant tea service, heating the water with a Fire spell and giving Claude time to compose himself. </p><p>"You’re awfully quiet," Claude said after a few moments. </p><p>Lorenz glanced over at him, curled up on a padded sofa. "I admit I’m fearful of saying the wrong thing," he said, fidgeting with a saucer. "Grief presents in different ways, and I’m unfamiliar with yours." </p><p>Claude gave a humourless laugh. "Grief might be overstating things. I never knew my grandfather as a child. He and my mother…didn't get along."</p><p>"Still," Lorenz said, turning with teacups in hand and bearing them across to the little table beside Claude's seat. "It is always difficult to lose family, even those you are not close to."</p><p>"If you say so," Claude murmured, turning his gaze aside. Lorenz frowned, realising he'd misstepped somehow, and followed Claude's gaze. A portrait hung over the fireplace, the clothing rather unfashionable but the face familiar. </p><p>"That is your uncle," Lorenz said, as recognition sparked.</p><p>Claude hummed. "So I'm told. I never saw him, but my mother spoke of him often. They were close as children."</p><p>"His loss must have grieved her. My siblings are much younger than I, but I should hope that they would still mourn my passing."</p><p>"Well, with any luck, they won't have to do so for a long time," Claude said, accompanying his words with a faint smile. </p><p>Lorenz's throat ached suddenly. He coughed gently, clearing it. "Indeed."</p><p>Claude sipped his tea, then his eyebrows shot up. "This is Almyran Pine tea." </p><p>"Yes," Lorenz said, swirling the amber-coloured liquid around in his cup. "They had some at the market, but I confess I find the taste rather bold. I can brew something softer, if you prefer." </p><p>Claude sighed. "No, this is—it’s good. Thank you." </p><p>"It may be little comfort, but tea is all I have to offer you," Lorenz said doubtfully. "I can provide stimulating conversation, if you’d prefer." </p><p>"Is that not what we’re doing right now?" </p><p>"Claude," Lorenz sighed. "If you’d rather be alone, I can leave. I can’t read your thoughts, you know." </p><p>Claude shook his head and patted the space beside him on the sofa. "It’s all yours." </p><p>Lorenz squinted, trying in vain to read Claude’s emotions, then perched on the edge of the cushion. A hushed, comfortable silence fell as they watched the groundskeepers trimming hedges and soldiers dutifully patrolling the grounds in a timed rotation.</p><p>"It’s funny," Claude said at last. "I’ve been prepared for an event of this nature for so long, but now that the moment is here, I’ve no idea how to actually take command." </p><p>Lorenz bit back the words that threatened to burst forth from his throat and simply nodded, hoping to provide a semblance of comfort. "You will not be alone," he said, and when Claude looked up sharply, Lorenz offered him a weak smile. "Judith has been part of the council for some years, of course. I am sure she will be happy to guide you. And I—I may not have my father's years of experience, but I am at your service, should you require me." </p><p>"Thank you, Lorenz," Claude murmured, looking down into his delicate teacup. "In truth, I—" He paused, frowning. "No, never mind."</p><p>"Is something the matter?"</p><p>Claude shook his head. "Nothing new." He flashed Lorenz a crooked smile. "It's just that...the more I learn of this place, my role here, the more I begin to understand."</p><p>Lorenz found himself leaning forward to catch the low timbre of Claude's quiet words. "Understand what?"</p><p>"Why my mother chose to leave. I've no doubt she's better off now that she's gone."</p><p>Lorenz swallowed. "Ah." He frowned. "Your mother—is she...no longer with us?"</p><p>"What?" Claude laughed. "No. She's perfectly well. Or was, the last time I heard from her. She just has no patience for Alliance politics. Even if my grandfather had wished to name her his heir, I think she would have spit in his eye."</p><p>"Her own father?" Lorenz asked, shocked. </p><p>Claude gave him a strange look. "Yes. Why shouldn't she, if it wasn't the life she wanted?"</p><p>"B-but—what of duty?" Lorenz stammered. "As a noble—particularly of House Riegan, not only to abandon the duty of her birth, but to show such contempt for her forebears…"</p><p>"Ah, yes," Claude sighed. "I might have known you would take issue with such attitudes." He sipped his tea slowly. "I believe you and I have very different ideas of the meaning of duty."</p><p>It should have come as no surprise; he and Claude had been at odds since the day they met, and not only because Claude had usurped him. Yet Lorenz found himself taken somewhat aback by Claude's open admission of it. "And what is it to you?" he asked, a little haughty, but finding for the first time that he truly did wish to know Claude's feelings on the matter. </p><p>Claude glanced at Lorenz over the rim of his teacup. "Both everything and nothing at all," he said, a faded twinkle in his eye. </p><p>Lorenz frowned, but let the matter pass. Just this once. "So helpful," he murmured. </p><p>Claude smiled softly. </p><p>"I will drag the answer out of you one day," Lorenz warned him. "You’re getting a special allowance now, for your grief." </p><p>"That's very generous of you," Claude said, though it lacked his usual bite. After a moment he sighed, and his next words came out in a soft rush of breath, "Thank you, Lorenz." </p><p>Lorenz inclined his head. This close to Claude, he couldn’t tell whether the trembling he felt was the result of their proximity, or Claude’s own way of keeping his emotions in check. Pulling off his gloves, he placed a gentle hand on Claude’s back, and began to move it back and forth slowly, as though he were comforting one of his younger siblings. </p><p>With a sigh, Claude placed his teacup on the side table, then to Lorenz's surprise, he slumped forward and placed his head in his hands. </p><p>For several moments, Lorenz didn't move. He realised that he'd rarely, if ever, seen Claude lower his guard in such a manner. Even when he was exhausted, or injured, he tried not to let it show, always deflecting with some joke or attempt at teasing. Lorenz wondered if he ought to leave, but he didn't want to move his hand from the warmth of Claude's back. Instead, he slowly slid his hand higher, brushing over the loose collar of Claude's shirt, before settling on the back of his neck. Unlike the previous times they'd touched, there were no sparks, no lightning running down his spine, only a tingling warmth, like slipping into a hot bath.</p><p>Claude made a soft sound beside him, but he didn't pull away. Instead, he leaned very slightly into Lorenz's touch, his head still cradled in his hands. </p><p>They stayed like that as the shadows lengthened, taking solace in the soft, tingling energy flowing between them.</p><p> </p><p>—</p><p> </p><p>Lorenz had spent very little time at home since his first days at Garreg Mach, passing seemingly endless months in Derdriu instead, as he and Claude attempted to establish some sort of order. The empire was slowly beginning to squeeze its fist, while they did their best to maintain trade routes and supply as normal. It was a relief, therefore, to see the familiar hills surrounding the Gloucester' estate, the sprawling coppice that he'd played and hunted in as a child, the broad curve of the lake where he'd learned to fish and swim, and later taught his siblings the same skills. </p><p>Upon his arrival, he took his horse directly to the stables himself, greeting the familiar faces of the servants, before heading up to the house. The butler admitted him with moderate warmth—his father disliked exuberance without purpose—and Lorenz immediately made his way up to his bedroom to bathe and change before presenting himself to his family. </p><p>Some time later, clean and pressed, and no longer smelling of a long, hard ride, Lorenz made his way downstairs and was greeted in the hallway by the housekeeper.</p><p>"Master Lorenz," she said, curtseying, and treating him to a faint smile. "His Lordship is not at home at present, but you shall find her Ladyship in the parlour with the children."</p><p>"Thank you, Ms Brandt," Lorenz said, before making his way to the parlour as she'd indicated. </p><p>Lorenz's stepmother Maya sat on a pretty chaise, her youngest child on her lap, while the other two lay upon the floor drawing. </p><p>"Lorenz!" Maya cried as he entered, with all of the warmth that had been lacking in the rest of the household. </p><p>Adelina and Dirk looked up from their drawings with similar outbursts, although he noted that they did not run to embrace him as they would have when they were younger. Instead they rose and dropped an elegant curtsey and bow respectively. Lorenz returned it, then went down on one knee and opened his arms to embrace them both. They laughed and ran over to him, and he smiled as he caught them and pulled them close.</p><p>"I have missed you all," he sighed, hugging them tightly, smiling as they wrapped their little arms around his neck. </p><p>"Have you been fighting battles?" Dirk asked as they separated again.</p><p>"What was Derdriu like?" asked Adelina. </p><p>"Did you bring us presents?" Dirk added excitedly.</p><p>"Dirk!" his mother scolded.</p><p>Lorenz laughed. "That's quite alright, Maya." He gently pinched Dirk's chin between thumb and forefinger. "Of course I brought presents."</p><p>The children cheered, and Lorenz moved over to join his stepmother on the chaise, kissing her cheek softly. His father had remarried not long after Lorenz's own mother passed away, and his stepmother Maya was much closer in age to Lorenz than to his father. She had never tried to mother him, and Lorenz considered her a good friend, exchanging letters with her often. </p><p>"And how are you, little one?" Lorenz said, as two year old Hans reached out a pudgy hand to him.</p><p>Hans giggled, and Maya smiled indulgently. "Weren't you going to tell us about Derdriu?" she prompted, her eyes sparkling.</p><p>"Derdriu was beautiful, as ever," Lorenz said, moving to settle in an armchair. He spoke around the truth a bit, unwilling to tarnish the beauty of childish minds not yet so cynical. "Hot, of course. The sun reflects off of the water, and—dear Hans, whatever is the matter?" Hans was straining against his mother's hold, flailing his chubby fists in Lorenz's direction. Lorenz patted his knee with a smile. "Would you like to sit with me, dear one?" </p><p>"Oh, you'd like to sit with your big brother, wouldn't you, darling?" Maya cooed, bouncing Hans on her knee. She gestured to Dirk. "Dirk, darling, take Hans to your older brother."</p><p>"Surely the water is <i>cold</i>," Adelina said curiously, folding her legs underneath her as she sat at Lorenz’s feet. "How can the city be hot if the water is cold?" </p><p>"The sun warms it up," Lorenz said. "It reaches quite a pleasant temperature near midday. All the commoner children go bathing in it." He watched skeptically as Dirk hoisted Hans up by the armpits and ferried him over to Lorenz like a sack of potatoes, plopping him in his lap with a self-satisfied grin. </p><p>"Well done, love," Maya said, dusting off her skirts with a smile. "No injuries and no fits of pique. I’ll title that a success." </p><p>Lorenz gazed down into Hans’s face with a soft smile and readjusted his hold on chubby limbs as the chatter of Dirk and Adelina faded into the background. "It’s been a while, has it not? You’re practically as tall as I am." </p><p>Hans stared at him with a solemn expression, and blinked furiously as a purple curl fell into his eyes. </p><p>"Don’t be silly, Lorenz," Dirk said loudly. "He can’t talk yet. Mama said he’ll probably say my name first, since she’s always saying it." </p><p>"She’s only saying it because you’re always being irresponsible," Adelina scolded. Maya hid a smile as she rose, and began to steal away. "Try being proper once in a while." </p><p>"Oh, come now," Lorenz said, bouncing Hans lightly on his knee. "No doubt he’ll say my name first, since you’ve all missed me so much." </p><p>Hans giggled, and Lorenz laughed and cuddled him close as Dirk and Adelina began to bombard him with questions once more. He answered them all honestly, although he spared them the bloodiest details, and in turn asked them what they'd been up to, how things were at home. </p><p>"Dirk," Maya said, once Adelina had finished complaining about her new tutor. "Tell your older brother what you discovered the other day."</p><p>Lorenz sat and chatted with his siblings until it was almost time for their supper, at which point the nurse came and gathered them up. </p><p>"I must confess," Maya said, as their noisy chatter faded away down the hallway. "His Lordship is away so frequently nowadays, I've gotten used to supping with the children instead of at a respectable mealtime."</p><p>Lorenz laughed. "Well, it is quite natural to want to be with your children."</p><p>She hummed, then turned a smile on him, and reached out to clasp his hand. "I am so glad you've come home to us, Lorenz."</p><p>"Ah, well...I'm afraid I shan't be here for long, but I will endeavour to stay for as long as I may be spared." He returned her smile as best he could. "Your hospitality, as ever—"</p><p>"Oh, none of that," she said, shaking her head vigorously. "This was your home before ever it was mine. I should never wish you to feel unwelcome here."</p><p>Lorenz relaxed minutely. "Thank you. Has...father given any indication when he will return?"</p><p>Maya shook her head. "We expected him today, but he is often delayed."</p><p>"Ah."</p><p>"I'm sure he regrets that he couldn't be here to greet you."</p><p>"I'm quite sure you're right," Lorenz said, with an effusiveness he didn't feel. </p><p>She smiled, and rose. "Please excuse me, my dear. I must dress for dinner."</p><p>"But of course," he said, rising and then bowing to her. "I look forward to continuing our conversation over dinner."</p><p>Once his stepmother had retired, Lorenz stood and went to the glass panelled door that opened out onto the terrace. Opening the doors, he stepped out into the early evening air. It was a pleasant evening, and Lorenz drew in deep lungfuls of the familiar air, thankful to have returned to the sweet-smelling roses that his mother had planted years earlier, and which Lorenz had carefully cultivated since her death. But when he breathed in, he didn't smell roses. Looking around, he saw that they had all been rooted up and replaced by flowerless shrubs. Lorenz stared, horror struck by the devastation which had been wrought in his absence. He span in place, looking around him, but nothing remained of the roses he'd planted with his mother. He stumbled down the steps of the terrace, looking into the other beds, trying to see if his beloved roses had been transplanted to another part of the garden. He walked all around the house, and then down to the greenhouse, but nowhere did he see a single rose. </p><p>Lorenz walked briskly, the length and breadth of the gardens. He saw more evidence of changes being made to his mother's designs; paths had been dug up and relaid in different order, old trees torn down. He came at last to the horseshoe-shaped bed of dahlias that his mother had planted, rare varieties gathered from all over. They, at least, remained, though a large number of them had been removed. Lorenz wondered if his father had sold them. He sank onto the bench that looked out over the dahlia garden, casting his gaze over their large, heady blooms, once a dazzling rainbow of colour, now stripped and gaudy.</p><p>After a few minutes of stewing in idle nostalgia, Lorenz rose and crossed to the drooping plants. One particularly sunny bloom caught his eye. It was yellow, the colour of egg yolk, of a golden sunrise. Lorenz stared at it, the delicate whorls and rows of petals. Then, without quite knowing why, he lashed out, dashing aside the blousy flowerhead, leaving it hanging from its stem by a thread. Feeling guilty, Lorenz glanced over his shoulder, but there was nobody around to see. With a sigh, he walked back over to the bench and sank down onto it, hanging his head. </p><p>Lorenz wasn't sure how long he sat there, but finally he was rousing by the tolling of the bell in the local chapel, reminding him that he was late for dinner. Lost and miserable, Lorenz began to trudge back toward the house. He had been walking briskly, and was aware that he would arrive somewhat disheveled, but such concerns were beyond him in that moment.</p><p>His stepmother expressed her concerns when he arrived, though she did not scold him for his lack of punctuality. They sat down to dinner, although they had only just finished their soup when there came the sound of hoofbeats outside, and several minutes later the door burst open, and Count Gloucester strode in. </p><p>Lorenz shot up from his seat, rattling the table in his haste. </p><p>"Oh, my dear, here you are at last," Maya said cheerfully. "Won't you join us? I'm sure Cook can—"</p><p>"That will not be necessary," Lorenz's father said coolly. "I shall dine alone." His cold gaze fell on Lorenz. "So, you have returned."</p><p>"Father," Lorenz said, bowing his head. "I—"</p><p>"Tomorrow," said the Count, cutting him off. "I have had a long journey. Tomorrow you will provide a report of what you have been up to."</p><p>Lorenz swallowed heavily. "Yes, Father."</p><p>"Very well." He passed his gaze over Lorenz, and then over his wife. "Goodnight."</p><p>Once he was sure that the Count had gone, Lorenz sank back into his seat. He didn't meet Maya's gaze, but he could see her out of the corner of his eye, the way she seemed smaller than she had earlier that afternoon. Lorenz looked down at his meal, his stomach turning unpleasantly as he thought of his mother's rose beds.</p><p> </p><p>—</p><p> </p><p>Lorenz rose early the following morning, heading out for a morning ride to clear his thoughts. Despite being returned to his childhood room, he'd slept ill the previous night, his thoughts preoccupied with thoughts of the Alliance and Duke Riegan's long-expected death. When he finally slept, he'd woken more than once in a cold sweat from clinging nightmares. It was a relief to be out in the cool morning air, with the sunrise breaking over him as he urged his horse into a gallop across the fields. </p><p>The tension that had bled out of his shoulders only returned as he rubbed down his horse after their ride, worsened no doubt by his night of poor rest. He was joined by Maya and the children for breakfast, where he presented his siblings with their gifts, and tried to recapture the ease with which the conversation had flowed the previous afternoon, before his father's return. All the while, he awaited his summons, which arrived shortly after breakfast. With a heavy heart, Lorenz promised his siblings that he would play with them later, and made his way to the Eastern wing of the house</p><p>As a child, Lorenz had been permitted entry to his father's study only on the rarest of occasions. As of late, his entries were relegated to dressing downs, disagreements, and the full force of his father’s icy fury at the way Alliance matters were handled by the von Riegan family. </p><p>Lorenz knocked once on the large oak door of his father’s study and heaved a steadying breath as his father bade him enter.</p><p>"Lorenz."</p><p>Lorenz swallowed. "Father." The door shut soundlessly behind him. There were no windows in the room, only shelves upon shelves of dusty books, greying in their bindings, reaching up to the vaulted ceiling in stacks so high they made Lorenz feel as though he were standing in an upright coffin. </p><p>His father barely glanced up from his pile of documents as he gestured to one of the chairs in front of his desk. Lorenz sat gracefully, folding his hands as he waited uncomfortably. </p><p>After a few moments, his father finally sat back, placing his quill decisively in the inkwell. He scrutinized Lorenz closely. Lorenz fought the urge to squirm.</p><p>"So. I trust you’ve no new information to report since your last, <i>impressively</i>  scant letter?" </p><p>Lorenz inclined his head. "I do not," he said quietly. But, at the sight of his father's face falling—not in disappointment, but in resignation—Lorenz hesitated, biting his lip. He thought of the evening of the Duke's death, the weary slope of Claude's shoulders. Lorenz cleared his throat and continued, "Save that...the heir to House Riegan has confided to me that he is finding it difficult to take command." </p><p>The Count raised his eyebrows. "They’re rebelling against the mongrel?" </p><p>Lorenz looked down to hide a frown. "No," he said slowly. "He...finds solace in his grief." </p><p>The Count snorted. "Grief? The old wretch had been ill for years. I'm surprised at you, Lorenz, believing the crocodile tears of that upstart child."</p><p>Lorenz bit his tongue. His father had long counselled him that Claude could not be trusted, and indeed, Lorenz was the one who'd written to his father frequently during his time at Garreg Mach with tales of Claude's misdeeds and fabrications. He was, however, no longer certain of himself. He and Claude had not spoken of what happened between them on the evening of the Duke's death, yet Lorenz firmly believed that Claude's reactions had been honest. </p><p>"Whether we like it or not, Father, and I certainly do not, Claude <i>is</i>  in charge now."</p><p>The Count scoffed. "Yes, well. Perhaps, if we're lucky, a little accident may befall him, like his foolish uncle."</p><p>Lorenz's eyes widened a fraction. He knew little of the circumstances surrounding Godfrey von Riegan's death, as it had occurred a year before his birth, but he'd heard the rumour, as had most, that it hadn't been entirely an accident. </p><p>"The...accident," Lorenz ventured softly. </p><p>His father clicked his tongue impatiently. "Is of little consequence now. This lack of focus is precisely the reason the conniving little bastard was able to snatch your seat out from under you in the first place." He shook his head, lip curling in distaste. "To think of all the time, energy and resources I wasted on you…"</p><p>Lorenz said nothing, but all of a sudden it was as though he couldn't breathe. All of the hardship he had endured, the nightmares that still plagued him often, the careful trust he had built with Claude; surely the last five years of his life could not have been for naught.</p><p>"Well," his father muttered. "The council seat may be beyond your grasp, but I have another use for you."</p><p>"Indeed?" Lorenz asked, fighting to keep his voice steady.</p><p>The Count nodded. "I’ve arranged a potential match for you, her father and I are in talks. If nothing else, at least you may win us a fairly sizable dowry." </p><p>Lorenz blinked. "A marriage?" </p><p>"Did I stutter, boy?" The Count glared at him, as though he thought him stupid. Mute, Lorenz shook his head. "Very well, then you shall do as I say and meet the girl in a few days' time. Should her family find you agreeable—and they <i>will</i>  find you agreeable—I expect you will be wed within the year."</p><p>"Wed—" Lorenz began, floundering. "But, Father, I cannot wed, it would be...dishonest. To leave a young widow…"</p><p>His father brushed his concerns aside with a wave of his hand. "All that matters is that you secure an heir." He swept a doubtful gaze over Lorenz. "You can manage that much, I suppose?"</p><p>Lorenz bit the inside of his cheek as colour rushed to his face. "That—that will not be an issue."</p><p>"Good," his father said shortly. "Then—"</p><p>"But what of my brothers and sister?" Lorenz interrupted, frowning. "I thought...the estate and title surely would pass to one of them, when I…"</p><p>The Count wrinkled his nose. "My wife's children show little promise. None of them has a crest, nor any other distinguishing feature to recommend them. Adelina is tolerably pretty, perhaps she will make a worthy match, but as for the boys." He shook his head. "Quite a disappointment. Still, perhaps it is not too late to have them...altered, as you were."</p><p>A chasm opened within Lorenz's chest, spreading wide and deep. He stared at the Count for several moments, struggling to compose himself. "You—" he began, his hoarse voice betraying his feeling. "You cannot mean that."</p><p>"Oh?" The Count raised an eyebrow at him. "Do you presume to tell me my own mind, boy?"</p><p>Lorenz grimaced. "Not at all, Father, forgive my impudence. It is just—"</p><p>"Just that you prize those worthless brats above your own father?" the Count asked in a low, dangerous voice. </p><p>Choking down his fury and disgust, Lorenz thought of what he'd endured at the hands of those who'd granted him his second crest, and of the nightmares that still plagued him. He thought of Lysithea and her family, her siblings brushed under the carpet as mere casualties of history. He thought of Claude's words about his mother, and their differing notions of loyalty, and of his own mother, her portrait locked away, her garden uprooted, nothing left of her in this place she'd touched. </p><p>"Forgive me, Father," Lorenz whispered, his voice no longer shaking. "I thought only of continuing our name. Should my wife and I prove unable to produce an heir in time, there is no guarantee that any of the children would survive the experiments. The House of Ordelia, you may recall, lost all but one. I ask only that you refrain until it is sure that my line is secured."</p><p>The Count eyed him carefully. As a child, Lorenz had never been able to hide a secret from him, but he was a child no longer, and he had spent years cultivating his careful facade. He would not allow his father to see what this truly meant for him. </p><p>"Very well," the Count said at length, turning his attention back to his letters. "You raise a valid point. There is no hurry to submit the little ones to the knife. However, remember well that their fate rests in your hands." He sighed and gave Lorenz a piercing glance. "By the Goddess, if anything should happen to upset this betrothal, understand that I shall be extremely displeased." </p><p>Lorenz nodded and bowed. "I understand you perfectly, Sir."</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>your comments and kudos help keep us going, thank you! :)</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Chapter 5</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>In the months that followed, Lorenz took pains not to aggravate his father's temper, and exchanged letters frequently with his stepmother to ensure himself that his siblings were safe. He met with his betrothed—a sweet girl of seventeen from a minor noble house connected to Daphnel—on several occasions, and finally their engagement was formally announced for the following Garland Moon.</p><p>In the meantime, Lorenz kept a close watch on his father's business: the way he voted on the council, where he directed his troops, who owed him favours. When his father expressed surprise at Lorenz's growing interest in family matters, adding to his already busy war schedule, Lorenz replied sincerely that he wanted to prepare himself for the noble duty of fatherhood. And, of course, that he dreaded the thought of bringing a child into a world where Claude led the Alliance. That argument in particular seemed to hold sway with the Count. </p><p>In truth, Claude had flourished in his role as leader. With the Duke so ill prior to his death, Claude had been doing much of the minutiae in any case, and upon the Duke's death, the other Lords naturally turned to Claude to guide them, even the ones who were so often in disagreement with him. </p><p>Unfortunately, however, their seeking his guidance and judgement did not prevent them from continuing to challenge him publicly, and more than one roundtable discussion had devolved into petty squabbling. Lorenz found himself consistently astonished by the childishness of these supposedly sound-minded adults. </p><p>It was the tail end of summer, and the heat was stirring up already high passions. Claude had done an impressive job of carrying off the meeting with minimal argument, but as they began to discuss the final item on the agenda, Lorenz realised that the other Lords had merely been lulling them until a false sense of security. </p><p>"I find myself unwilling to pursue that policy decision," Lord Oritz said loudly, sitting back in his chair. A murmur of voices went around the roundtable, and Lorenz sighed internally.</p><p>Lorenz leaned closer to Claude and whispered in his ear. "Appeal to his ego. Show him that—"  </p><p>"You don’t think I know that?" Claude muttered out of the corner of his mouth. He kicked Lorenz lightly underneath the table.</p><p>"Unwilling, you say?" Claude said, louder. He spread his arms wide. "And what would you have us do? Our soldiers sit idly by. We must send them to defend the borders." </p><p>"Would that we could," Lord Oritz heaved a false sigh. "But our house’s cavalry numbers have yet to be replenished." He turned a smug look in Claude's direction. "Your precious supply lines have broken, von Riegan." </p><p>Lorenz frowned. That couldn’t be right. The cavalry in question was waiting upon mounts from House Larissa, whose stables were plentiful. The estate had already supported a busy stud farm before the war began, and had widened their operation since then with support from House Gloucester. It was some time since Lorenz had visited personally, but as their direct neighbour he had no doubt that his father could have offered assistance at any time, particularly for such an important supply line.</p><p>The realisation hit him suddenly, and Lorenz stifled a gasp and stared down at his hands, clenching them under the table. To think that even here and now, after Lorenz had proven himself capable of taking over Roundtable affairs—had proven it through <i>blood</i>—his father still didn't think him trustworthy enough to reveal his true plans. <i>As if the stench of his odious affairs wasn't apparent from a league away</i>, Lorenz thought bitterly. Delaying a supply of fresh horses to the cavalrymen was a tidy and subtle way to break the supply chain and undermine Claude’s authority with the Roundtable: after all, horses went lame, threw shoes, and colicked at every turn. It would be easy enough for House Larissa to claim scant resources.</p><p>Claude shifted in his seat, looking at Lorenz out of the corner of his eye. For a moment, Lorenz furiously debated with himself whether to call Duke Oritz out on his lie. For it would have to be a lie, wouldn’t it? No Duke worth his feed would sit back unquestioningly when his troops’ livelihoods were on the line.</p><p>The swooping in Lorenz’s stomach made him feel green. He shook off Claude’s look of concern and closed his eyes to maintain his composure. </p><p>"Well then." Claude said after a moment. "I’ll send my best man out on the job." He patted the arm of Lorenz’s chair. The suggestion that he was merely Claude's errand boy rankled, but Lorenz kept himself in check until the end of the meeting, focusing on his irritation to distance himself from the sickly feeling of nerves in his stomach. </p><p>Claude’s voice cut through the clatter of chair legs scraping across the polished floor as the room emptied. "Ah—Lorenz. A moment?" </p><p>Though he phrased it as a question, his voice was firm. Lorenz startled, nearly dropping the sheaf of papers he was scraping together. "Yes?"</p><p>"You wouldn’t happen to know anything about those missing horses, would you?" Claude asked, his voice deceptively light, almost playful. "Larissa is awfully close to Gloucester, if I remember my geography correctly."</p><p>Lorenz cleared his throat, his mind scrambling for an excuse. "Though I have knowledge of many of my father’s affairs and accounts," he began, drawing himself up and setting his shoulders squarely, "I have yet to be instructed on the matter of House Larissa." Lorenz sniffed. "I am acquainted with the family, naturally, but that doesn't mean I may enumerate every stray pike and hay bale."</p><p>"Correct me if I'm mistaken," Claude said, still speaking in the same conversational tone, "but it was my understanding that you take an active interest in equine stock across Alliance territories. Did this simply...slip your notice?" He accompanied his words with an impertinent quirk of his eyebrow, knowing full well the slight he conveyed with his words.</p><p>Lorenz winced inwardly; he'd spoken carefully to avoid dissembling. While it was true that he couldn't have named House Larissa's current stud fees, he could recall without consulting a ledger the number of stallions they had put out to stud that year and the last. "Perhaps it did," he said, though the words made him sick inside. "Of course, I have been rather <i>preoccupied</i>  with other matters of late."</p><p>Claude scrutinized him. "You can’t really expect me to believe that you’ve ignored your neighbours since war broke out." </p><p>"Not <i>ignored</i>," Lorenz said testily. "The social aspect between our houses has fallen to the wayside during wartime. That is all there is to it." </p><p>"Acquaintances can fall to the wayside during war, Gloucester," Claude said, rapping his knuckles on the table. "Horses that supply our military? They can’t." </p><p>Lorenz flushed. How galling, that the price of keeping his father’s secret was to make himself fool in front of Claude von Riegan. "I will look into it," he said, careful to keep his voice steady. Too steady, perhaps, as Claude cut him a sharp look before leaning back in his chair with a raised eyebrow.</p><p>"Enough of that then. I hear congratulations are in order."</p><p>Lorenz blinked, caught off-guard at the sudden change of topic. "Thank you."</p><p>"You must be excited," Claude said lightly. </p><p>"Please," Lorenz said, sighing. "You know as well as I do that it is a political match, and one of my father's choosing, for that matter."</p><p>Claude laughed. "Don't look so gloomy! I thought marriage was something you aspired to."</p><p>Lorenz huffed. "Marriage is a noble's duty. I admit that in my idle moments I may aspire to <i>romance</i>, though I little expect it."</p><p>"Whyever not?" Claude asked, propping his chin in his hand.</p><p>"Tch. A foolish question," Lorenz sighed, looking away. </p><p>Claude leaned closer. "Why?" he murmured. "You're kind, handsome, thoughtful when you feel like it. Why should a little romance be out of your grasp?" </p><p>Lorenz whipped his head around in surprise. "Do you mock me?"</p><p>Claude's brow crumpled, his pretty mouth twisting. "Of course not," he said, sounding hurt. "Why would you think I was mocking you?"</p><p>"Because, Claude von Riegan," Lorenz said archly, unsettled by Claude's seeming earnestness in asking, "you have always taken <i>great</i>  delight in doing so. Am I to believe you've suddenly lost all interest in the sport, simply because I am engaged?"</p><p>Claude gave a disquieted laugh. "Well, I must admit, I do find you...irresistible." He grinned. "To tease, that is."</p><p>Having more or less expected that precise answer, Lorenz only rolled his eyes and sighed.</p><p>After a few moments, Claude released his own sigh and got up from the table, coming around it to where Lorenz stood. </p><p>"You're not about to say something heartfelt and touching, are you?" Lorenz asked, squinting at him. </p><p>Claude laughed. "Would you prefer I didn't?"</p><p>"Yes," Lorenz said with feeling. "I certainly would. Solemnity doesn't suit you."</p><p>"Oh?" Claude said, leaning back against the table with a dangerous look in his eye. "You don't think I can be serious?"</p><p>"I think you <i>can</i>," Lorenz replied tartly. "That doesn't mean you <i>ought</i>."</p><p>"Mm." Claude hummed and glanced away. There was a faint, humourless smile on his face, and Lorenz felt abruptly sorry that he'd been so short with him. But when he opened his mouth to apologise, Claude spoke before he could get the words out. "Then I won't," he said simply, and cut his eyes back to Lorenz, now sly, the softness that Lorenz hadn't noticed before now evaporated. "Should I be crass instead? Perhaps I should comment on the manifold attractions of your betrothed? I haven't seen her myself of course, but I have a vivid imagination. Or perhaps you'd like my encouragement to sow your wild oats while you still have the chance."</p><p>Lorenz clicked his tongue. "I wish you wouldn't be flippant when you simply wish not to be seen."</p><p>His expression unchanged, Claude raised an eyebrow at him. "Is that what I do?"</p><p>"I offended you," Lorenz said stiffly. "I was careless with my words. I apologise."</p><p>"Lorenz, it's forgotten," Claude said, but the laughter in his voice was cool. </p><p>"Ah...good then."</p><p>Claude cleared his throat. "Before you go, there's one more thing," he said, gesturing Lorenz closer. "You can see as well as I do that they're trying to force my hand with this nonsense over the supply lines."</p><p>"Of course they are," Lorenz said, nodding. "Although they would likely have done the same to the late Duke if it suited their interest."</p><p>"No doubt," Claude agreed, shaking his head. "But in the meantime, I've written to Edelgard. Perhaps there's some way we can bring this whole mess to a swift conclusion."</p><p>Lorenz's eyes widened. "Do you really think it can be solved so easily?"</p><p>"I never said it would be easy," Claude replied with a faint smile. "But if she agrees to talk, I'd like you to accompany me."</p><p>"Ah...of course," Lorenz said, giving a solemn nod. "You may count upon it."</p><p> </p><p>—</p><p> </p><p>Upon the conclusion of the roundtable meeting, Lorenz had written directly to his father, raising the issue of the missing Larissan mounts in a circuitous manner, by which he hoped to draw the Count out and establish whether or not he had any prior knowledge of the sudden shortage. The missive he received in response several days later was brief, but Lorenz was relieved that he'd waited until he was alone to open the letter.</p><p> </p><p>
  <i>Lorenz,</i>
</p><p>
  <i>I shouldn't have to warn you by now to keep your nose out of matters that do not concern you. Your insinuations regarding L—— are quite absurd, perhaps the fancy of disquieted thoughts; indeed, I worry that the strain of your position may be too much for your constitution at present, and suggest that you return to Hartley so that your stepmother may tend to you.</i>
</p><p><i>Perhaps you will consider such an intervention unnecessary, but understand that I shall consider any refusal to obey as evidence that you have fallen under the sway of that charlatan. Any allegiance you may feel toward the one in question should be cast away, as he will not impede us much longer.</i> </p><p>
  <i>Do what is right by your family, boy. I shall not ask again.</i>
</p><p>
  <i>Leopold Friedrich Gloucester</i>
</p><p> </p><p>Lorenz read the letter through thrice, before dashing it into the fire with a scowl. He quickly regretted his rashness and seized the half-burnt paper out of the flames, but it was too late. Whatever the Count had intended by his threat, it had been eaten up by the fire. Lorenz stood, holding the charred remnants, while his heart sank down into his boots. His father had all but announced his intention to have Claude removed from his position. How he intended to do it was irrelevant for the moment; Lorenz needed to warn him, but to do so would reveal not only that his father had been plotting against Claude, but that he, Lorenz, had been complicit.</p><p>Before he could reach a decision, Lorenz's thoughts were interrupted by a knock on the door. Opening it, he was presented with another letter, this one even shorter, and addressed in Claude's careless hand. </p><p>Sighing, Lorenz folded the short note and nodded to the servant. "Tell the Duke I shall be ready to ride within the hour."</p><p> </p><p>—</p><p> </p><p>They were several hours from Derdriu when one of Lorenz's soldiers requested a pause. Her horse had thrown a shoe and almost unseated her, and it had unsettled several of the other young, ill-broken mounts in the company. Since it was beginning to get dark, Claude sent two scouts ahead to locate a place to set up camp. </p><p>"A shame that we're between all the good wayhouses," Lorenz groused. His mount, a nimble mare from the Gloucester stables named Aplani, whickered, and he leaned forward absently to pat her neck. "Only because sleeping with a roof over our heads is far safer, sweet thing." </p><p>"And because you'd kill a man for a hot bath, I have no doubt." Claude's voice floated past the assembled company, his laughter drawing nearer as he rode up beside Lorenz. "But we have the advantage of being harder to find out here," he continued in a low voice, "and I'll take anonymity over comfort on any day."</p><p>Lorenz frowned. "You suspect...interference?"</p><p>Claude's face was solemn. "Perhaps," he said, and glanced around them meaningfully. "Let's not discuss it just at present."</p><p>Lorenz bristled somewhat at being forced to submit to Claude's subterfuge, but even he could recognise that the fewer of their party that knew of the true cause of their mission, the better. Although most wanted to see an end to the war, few on the council were of a mind to reason with Edelgard, preferring instead to see Adrestia soundly beaten for daring to raise a hand to her neighbours. Lorenz reflected with a sigh that his annoyance stemmed from Claude's general disposition and his tendency toward secrecy, than any specific complaint. </p><p>They rode for another half hour or so before halting to set up camp for the night. When their slim assignment of troops were settled and fed, and scouts had been set to watch for danger, Claude gestured to Lorenz, and the two set off at a leisurely walk beneath the rising moon. </p><p>"Alright," Lorenz said, once he was certain they were out of earshot of the camp, and Claude still had not spoken a word. "What is all this about?"</p><p>"I can't risk compromising these talks with Edelgard—"</p><p>"Not that," Lorenz said, shaking his head, and gesturing expansively. "All this precaution, when we are still well within Alliance territory. No doubt you've heard the soldiers saying that you're acting like a frightened maid who expects some attack upon her innocence at any moment." Claude raised an eyebrow at him, silent for long enough that Lorenz coloured. "I merely repeat what I have heard," he added, wrinkling his nose. </p><p>"I have ears too," Claude sighed, looking away from him to watch his path instead, and stepping nimbly over a tree root. "And I think you know as well as I do, Lorenz, that not everyone on the council supported my ascension."</p><p>Lorenz wet his mouth nervously. "W-well, perhaps not at first—"</p><p>"No, Lorenz," Claude said. He sounded weary. "Not then, and not now." He stopped as they came to the side of a stream, and drawing off his gauntlets, bent down to scoop a handful of water to his mouth. "Most of them can abide me as they must, but some still seek to undermine my leadership." He looked up, his mouth and chin still wet, shining in the moonlight. "You know this."</p><p>"...Yes," Lorenz whispered. </p><p>Looking down again, Claude uncapped his canteen and filled it from the stream water, then stood slowly. "This matter of the Larissan horses," he said in a ponderous voice. "It isn't the first unforeseen issue we've had of late. First the Eastern trade routes being harried, then there was that sudden blight in the Northern fields, and now supplies being sabotaged."</p><p>"I should not call it sabotage!" Lorenz said in faint desperation. "Crops in the North always struggle," he went on. "They suffer the same difficulty in preserving arable land as in Faerghus. And the disruption to our trade routes was the fault of the Almyrans."</p><p>"Or meant to look like them," Claude muttered, gazing idly into the darkness across the stream. </p><p>Lorenz sighed. "Claude, forgive me, but...towards the end, the Duke was, ah—he sometimes saw suspicion where in fact there was none. Perhaps…"</p><p>Claude had gone very still, his shoulders tense, his canteen paused halfway to his mouth. He turned slowly to look at Lorenz. "Are you calling me mad, Lorenz?"</p><p>Lorenz's eyes widened. "Why—of course not, I—"</p><p>"You know as well as I do who's behind these interferences," Claude said, his voice like ice. "You know, and yet you refuse to see it. And you put me in the position of doubting you, too."</p><p>Lorenz swallowed heavily. "Claude—"</p><p>"I thought you valued duty and honour above all things," Claude said, his voice terrible, and terribly soft.</p><p>"Of course I do," Lorenz snapped. "But—duty to family—"</p><p>"Ha!" Claude turned away from him then, shaking his head. "Out of my sight, Lorenz. I've had enough of this."</p><p>"You cannot dismiss me like some common servant," Lorenz squawked, stalking after him as Claude began to trudge back toward their camp. "Claude!" He reached out and caught hold of Claude's shoulder, stopping him short. "Claude—!"</p><p>"Enough, Lorenz!" Claude hissed, rounding on him. His eyes were narrowed, his brow creased and his mouth twisted with fury; Lorenz realised that he had never seen Claude look truly angry before. "Enough!"</p><p>Claude's hands were still wet, and he hadn't yet re-donned his gauntlets. As he turned, knocking Lorenz's hand away, their bare skin touched, and a spark of lightning jumped between their fingertips. The feeling of it rippled up Lorenz's arm, and he gasped at the sudden shock of sensation. </p><p>They stared at one another for several moments, both breathing hard. Then, without really meaning to, Lorenz found himself leaning in. Claude did the same, until their lips were a mere breath apart, but as Lorenz closed his eyes, Claude suddenly seized a handful of Lorenz's clothing, and thrust him back against the nearest tree. Lorenz let out a yelp, his eyes flying open, to see Claude leaning in with a murderous look in his eye. </p><p>"As far as I'm concerned," Claude muttered, "you're no better than your father."</p><p>With that, he released Lorenz and stalked away into the gloom. Lorenz watched after him for several moments, breathless and dazed, and feeling very, very foolish.</p><p> </p><p>—</p><p> </p><p>Lorenz woke with a start to the grey shroud between night and dawn. He was disoriented, unaware what had woken him at first, until he heard the sudden roar of voices from without. Pulling on his boots and jacket, Lorenz scrambled out of his tent, and was met with a sight of utter chaos. Masked assailants had surrounded the camp, and several Alliance soldiers already lay dead, while more were currently engaged in combat. Lorenz sprinted toward where he'd lashed Aplani, snatching up a lance and hauling himself into her saddle with all haste. </p><p>Coaxing her into a canter, Lorenz circled the camp and skewered three assailants one after another, Aplani's slender dappled form melting in and out of the morning mist. He came up before one of Claude's lieutenants, a severe woman who appeared to be fighting in her underthings, a great shield strapped to her left arm.</p><p>"Where's the Duke?" Lorenz cried.</p><p>She raised her arm and pointed, and just as Lorenz turned to look, an arrow whistled past his head, close enough for the breeze to stir the loose strands of his hair, and thudded into something close behind him. Lorenz glanced down and saw that the arrow had struck in the eye of a man who had been attempting to creep up behind him. Heart racing, Lorenz turned again to the source of the arrow and caught a glimpse of Claude, halfway up a tree with his sash of office securing him to a branch while he fired off arrow after arrow at their attackers. </p><p>Before he could become distracted enough to risk another attack, Lorenz nudged Aplani into motion, and the two continued to circle the campsite, Aplani trampling those on foot who weren't quick enough to escape, while Lorenz battered the rest with his lance. He lost sight of Claude in the confusion and the mist. It had rained overnight, and the ground became impossibly churned up by the few of their number who'd managed to get on horseback in time. By the time they had repelled their attackers, Lorenz was splattered with mud and blood to the hip, and sweat was pouring into his eyes. </p><p>As the campsite fell quiet, Lorenz brushed his hair back with one filthy hand and looked around for Claude. There was no sign of him. Reaching down, Lorenz caught a soldier by the shoulder, a man by the name of Claes he recognised from his own ranks. "Where is the Duke?" he asked in a hoarse voice.</p><p>The man's grim expression didn't change. "Got what 'e deserved, di'n'e?"</p><p>Lorenz stared at him. "What in the Saints—"</p><p>Without waiting for further explanation, Lorenz urged Aplani across the broken campground in the direction he'd seen Claude earlier. He found a handful of soldiers gathered around, and calling out for order, he shouldered them aside. Claude lay on the ground, his head propped in the lap of his lieutenant, whose underthings were now stained scarlet with his blood. There was a blade wound in Claude's side, deep by the looks of it.</p><p>"Is he—" Lorenz began.</p><p>Claude answered before anyone else could, with a laboured breath and a cough that coated his mouth with blood. "Lorenz," he said weakly.</p><p>"Doesn't a single soul here know any <i>Faith</i>  magic?" Lorenz asked impatiently.</p><p>"Not enough," Claude's lieutenant answered in a low voice. </p><p>Lorenz's insides turned cold and solid, and a kind of iron calm descended over him. "Bring him to the nearest tent, <i>now</i>. I take it there is no healer…?"</p><p>"Killed, m'lord," someone offered. </p><p>Lorenz nodded, steeling himself. "Then I shall do what I can." He followed the procession as they moved Claude, as carefully as they could manage, into the nearest tent, and someone passed in a lantern. Lorenz knelt beside Claude's sprawled form, reaching up to dash his hair out of his eyes once more. "Damn it—someone bring me something to tie my hair, for Cichol's sake."</p><p>While he waited, Lorenz bent over Claude, cupping his chin and turning it toward him. He could feel Claude's breath on his hand, his chest still heaving as he struggled for breath. Reaching down, Lorenz pulled aside the torn shreds of Claude's shirt and winced at the brief sight of the mangled flesh: the deep, oozing wound. Grabbing a loose piece of clothing from nearby, he placed it over the wound and pressed down hard.</p><p>Claude hissed through his teeth. </p><p>"Please, dearest, try to bear it," Lorenz murmured, anxiety making his throat tight. </p><p>Claude's lieutenant pulled back the tent flap at that moment. She held a strip of leather to Lorenz, and at his nod, she murmured an apology before gathering his dirty hair in her bloodstained hands and tying it back into a messy queue.</p><p>With that, she withdrew again, and Lorenz was left alone with his dying friend. </p><p>"Y-you—see," Claude said weakly, with a soft huff of laughter. "What did I tell you?"</p><p>"I'm so sorry," Lorenz whispered. </p><p>Claude reached for him, and Lorenz made a soft, aching sound when Claude's hand curled around the back of his neck. "I'm sorry for what I said to you last night."</p><p>Lorenz shook his head softly, taking care not to dislodge Claude's hand. "At times, it is the truth that cuts deepest," he said haltingly. He paused, wavering, as he debated how much of his father's plot to reveal to Claude while he was thus indisposed. "I—"</p><p>Claude's hand dropped from his neck as his eyes fluttered shut. "No," Lorenz moaned, pressing down harder on the wound. He would not allow this to become a confessional; this would not be Claude's deathbed. </p><p>"I require hot water and the cleanest cloths you can muster!" he called over his shoulder. A flurry of movement erupted beyond the tent flap, but he ignored it, gazing down at Claude's wound and trying not to let the horror of it show on his face. "Now then, let's see what we're dealing with," he said, trying to keep his voice steady. </p><p>Lorenz exhaled slowly and moved aside the blood-soaked shirt he was using to stem the bleeding. </p><p>This close to Claude, his bones hummed like an angry hornet nest. As he rested his hands on Claude's naked side, the humming sparked into a roar, washing his senses in bloody, scarlet fury. Claude shivered under his touch, but didn't open his eyes, and Lorenz frowned.</p><p>"Oh no you don't, Claude von Riegan," he growled, his voice shaking. "You won't leave me without a friend just yet." </p><p>Lorenz placed his hands on Claude's bare flesh, wincing at the sensation of hot blood running up between his fingers. He closed his eyes, trying to focus on what little Faith knowledge he'd learned in school. He reached for the Goddess, for Her wisdom, but try as he might to clear his mind and concentrate, nothing seemed to be happening. </p><p>"Saints damn me," Lorenz cursed, his voice breaking. In desperation, he reached for one of Claude's hands, entwining Claude's limp fingers with his own. "Don't you dare give up on me, Claude."</p><p>The usual sparks he felt when they touched were nowhere to be found, but Lorenz closed his eyes and reached deep for the sensation, focusing on the humming in his bones, the shimmer of light that he couldn't see, only feel. It was still there, but faint, like dust from a butterfly's wing. Lorenz reached for the golden threads at the edges of his senses. Dizziness struck him and he almost fell, but he held on, grasping for those ragged golden threads. </p><p>All of a sudden he felt a sensation like a bubble bursting, or ice cracking, only it was <i>him</i>, and he gasped out loud as the shock rippled through him. In the same moment, Claude gave a hoarse gasp of his own, drawing in a deep, vital breath, as of one who'd been drowning finally breaking the surface. </p><p>"Claude!" Lorenz gasped, grasping for his face. "Claude—dear one, can you hear me?"</p><p>Claude blinked around him, lost and fearful for a moment, his breathing harsh. But then his bright gaze met Lorenz's and he soothed by degrees, relaxing into Lorenz's touch. He reached up one sticky, trembling hand to cup Lorenz's cheek. "Am I dead?" he whispered.</p><p>Lorenz laughed wetly. "Apparently not, you <i>cur</i>."</p><p>"No," Claude sighed in agreement, stroking Lorenz's cheekbone with the pad of his thumb. "You would never condescend to look so filthy in paradise." </p><p>"Imbecile," Lorenz huffed fondly. "Saints, Claude, I—I thought I'd lost you there." </p><p>"Lorenz…" Claude gave a weak tug, and Lorenz came closer to him, until their faces were mere inches apart. </p><p>Lorenz studied the face below him; the softness of his eyes, his drawn expression—no doubt he was still in a great deal of pain—and the drying blood on his lower lip. Without thinking, Lorenz leaned down to close the distance between them, tasting the iron on Claude's lips. Claude's fingers slid into his hair, and Lorenz sighed against his perfect mouth. </p><p>Guilt parted them at last; a sickness that rose in Lorenz's chest and began to choke him, so that he pulled back with a gasp.</p><p>"What—what is it?" Claude asked, eyes wide.</p><p>Lorenz shook his head, moving back so that he could examine the state of Claude's wound. It was still open and oozing blood, but the ragged edges had mostly knitted together, and when he placed his hand over it and concentrated hard, he could feel that Claude was whole inside—more or less—with some form of magical energy still humming beneath his skin. They were interrupted at that moment by the arrival of hot water and bandages, and Lorenz did his best to clean what was left of the wound before binding it tight. </p><p>Claude watched him patiently throughout his ministrations, only giving a low grunt of pain when Lorenz finally helped lower him onto his back again. "Lorenz," he whispered, as Lorenz began to turn away.</p><p>"I know very well you want me out of your sight," Lorenz said, his voice low. "I shall have someone watch over—"</p><p>"Hold on," Claude protested, getting an elbow against the bedroll. He started to push himself up with a grunt. "What—"</p><p>Lorenz gave a cry of protest and firmly pushed him back down. "What do you think you're doing?" he demanded.</p><p>Claude scowled at him. "I'm trying to stop you running off!"</p><p>"I shall remain within the camp, if that is your concern," Lorenz said coldly. "I am not such a coward as to run from my fate."</p><p>"Why should I think you would run?" Claude asked, looking mystified. "Damn it, Lorenz. Every time I come close to figuring you out, you slip through my fingers again." After a moment, his face softened, and he patted the space beside him. "Stay. Please."</p><p>"How can you—" Lorenz began, cutting himself off when his throat closed off any further attempt at speech. He swallowed heavily, blinking back hot tears. "This was my fault."</p><p>Claude's brow creased. "No, it wasn't."</p><p>"I <i>knew</i>  my father meant you harm, and I did nothing," Lorenz spat, the tears burning his eyes so sharply that his vision blurred. "I thought—I thought his threats idle, or—or that you'd scheme your way out of it somehow. I didn't want to believe it."</p><p>"Lorenz, peace," Claude said softly, catching hold of Lorenz's wildly gesturing hands. "We can talk of that later. For now, I want you to know how you just did the work of two healers without breaking a sweat." He smirked. "I recall how little you enjoyed studying Faith magic at the academy."</p><p>Lorenz glanced away. "It—wasn't that impressive."</p><p>Claude frowned. "I've been on battlefields as long as you, Lorenz. That wound should've killed me." </p><p>"I wasn't about to let that happen," Lorenz muttered, clasping his hand more tightly. </p><p>"It was something else, wasn't it?" Claude whispered, holding Lorenz's gaze with his own, eyes fever-bright. "That feeling, when we touch—I know you feel it too."</p><p>Lorenz shook his head. "Do you feel it now?"</p><p>"Well...no," Claude admitted, frown deepening. "But the amount of energy you must have just expended to heal me—"</p><p>"Quite," Lorenz said, cutting him off. "And that following a skirmish on very little sleep. Perhaps you might allow me to rest before you begin the inquisition."</p><p>Claude sighed, but to Lorenz's relief, he didn't press. Doubtless Claude felt as drained as he did, if not more.</p><p>Despite what Lorenz had said, he didn't dare leave Claude alone for fear that his condition may worsen; whatever Lorenz had done, he knew it had very little to do with his skill in Faith magic, and considerably more to do with his second crest. At least, he reflected, as he lay down beside Claude, having set a watch to guard the camp and collect the dead, <i>some</i>  good had finally come of the wretched thing.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I promise we're done with tense painful battles. Probably. </p><p>Also...KISSING. We're not done with that.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Chapter 6</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>This chapter count just keeps on climbing...thank you for bearing with us! :)</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Despite being exhausted after the battle and his exertions following it, Lorenz found himself unable to sleep. Once Claude was resting peacefully, and Lorenz was certain that he was in no immediate danger, he left Claude under heavy guard and went to begin the tedious business of interrogating everyone in the camp. Several of their soldiers had been lost, and while Lorenz was busy with Claude, several of the survivors had carefully arranged the dead along the edge of the camp, clearly unsure whether they ought to begin digging graves. They had brought no wagon with them, but Lorenz sent a rider away to the nearest down to acquire one, unwilling to leave the soldiers with unmarked graves when they were so close to home. </p><p>He began his enquiries with Claude's lieutenant. She was a stout woman with powerful arms and shoulders, and it was clear that in addition to being a fine warrior, she held great respect for Claude. Lorenz had been unable to remember her name in the madness of that morning, but he recalled it now with some relief as the two of them walked slowly a short distance from the camp.</p><p>"We had three on watch," Lieutenant Krenn began, without waiting for him to ask. They both knew what it was he needed to know. "One was killed, quiet like. They knew where to look for us, even down to where we placed our guards."</p><p>Lorenz cursed softly. "We were betrayed."</p><p>"Aye, milord," she said, watching him with a grim expression. "We recovered all of our number who was killed. Two are missing."</p><p>"Missing?" Lorenz asked, looking at her in surprise. "Carried off?"</p><p>Krenn's jaw tensed. "I doubt it, milord."</p><p>Lorenz grimaced. "I perceive your meaning. The betrayers were amongst us from the outset."</p><p>She nodded. "Aye." </p><p>He waited for her to go on, but when she said nothing, Lorenz frowned. "Well? Who were they?"</p><p>Krenn looked over her shoulder briefly before speaking. "Maurer and Claes. Servants to House Gloucester, milord."</p><p>Her words pierced Lorenz's heart like a spear of ice. The traitors had come from Gloucester. He recalled with sudden, agonising clarity, his father's insistence on bolstering and retraining Lorenz's troops several months earlier. Lorenz had thought little of it at the time, particularly with all that had passed since then. Doubtless that had factored into his father's calculations; ensuring that his agents had plenty of time to bed themselves into Lorenz's ranks, so that he wouldn't think to look for sedition until it was too late. </p><p>"Were we able to capture any of the assailants?" he asked, trying to steady his voice as he recalled the brush he'd had with one of the men, shortly before rushing to Claude's aid. </p><p>Krenn shook her head, grimacing. "We killed three. The rest escaped in the confusion after Duke Riegan was wounded."</p><p>"Of course," Lorenz sighed. "No doubt they were counting on that. The bodies of the ones we killed, are they recognisable? Can they be identified?"</p><p>She nodded. "None of us knows their faces, but if we can fetch a wagon to bring our own back to the capital, we should be able to bring the bodies of the traitors too."</p><p>Lorenz nodded. "Thank you. Your service to the Duke is admirable."</p><p>Lieutenant Krenn saluted. "Thank you, milord," she said in a low voice, "for bringing him back to us."</p><p>Over the course of the morning, Lorenz interviewed every other surviving member of their party, checking in on Claude several times here and there. At noon, two wagons arrived with the exhausted rider they'd sent out, and Claude awoke just in time to greet them, staggering out of his tent with a hand clasped to his injured side.</p><p>"Claude von Riegan!" Lorenz called in a tone of pure outrage, marching toward him. "Get back in that tent this <i>instant</i>, unless you want me to put you there with the blunt end of my lance—!"</p><p>Claude smiled weakly. "Lorenz, don't be so—"</p><p>"Bed!" Lorenz commanded, stalking over to him. "I shall <i>not</i>  tell you again."</p><p>Lorenz had never seen Claude look cowed before, and he fully intended to enjoy the memory of it later, but as it was, he was gratified when Claude only sighed, shook his head, and retreated back into his own tent. Satisfied that his patient was resting once more, Lorenz went about making the rest of his urgent arrangements, before joining Claude in the tent. </p><p>He found Claude in some state of agitation, sitting but unable to keep from fidgeting. He tried to stand when Lorenz entered, but sank back onto his bedroll at Lorenz's quelling glare. Taking a seat close by, Lorenz appraised Claude of the situation, and what he'd managed to discover. </p><p>"Edelgard—" Claude began, but Lorenz shook his head.</p><p>"I sent someone I trust to carry the message that we had been unavoidably detained, but would be happy to treat with them in a week or so."</p><p>Claude huffed. "I doubt it. It seems likely that she was behind this. It's a neat enough way to dispose of me."</p><p>Lorenz gritted his teeth. "I imagine that you are trying to spare my feelings, however it is clear enough who was behind this attack." With a heavy heart, Lorenz briefly laid out the list of his father's crimes. Most of it, Claude no doubt already knew; the funneling of resources, the obstruction of council motions, and finally, the attempt on Claude's life. For several moments, Claude was quiet, absorbing his words, while Lorenz looked down at his hands.</p><p>"Assassination is a rather serious offence to lay at your father's door," Claude said at last, his voice soft. Lorenz wasn't sure whether the gentle tone was for his benefit, or to prevent them being overheard. </p><p>"I regret that I did not preserve the evidence of his plot," Lorenz muttered, shaking his head at his own foolishness. "He wrote to me, just a few days ago. His letter angered me, so I threw it into the fire. I only realised too late what damning evidence it contained."</p><p>"What evidence?" Claude asked, leaning closer. "What did he say?"</p><p>Lorenz sighed. "Nothing explicit. He named you a charlatan, and implied that you would not 'impede us much longer'. I meant to speak of it to you before we returned to Derdriu, but my father's agents acted more swiftly than I expected."</p><p>Claude's mouth thinned. "Perhaps he suspected that your loyalty might waver."</p><p>"As well he might," Lorenz snapped. "I am not loyal to that—that <i>snake</i>." At the surprise on Claude's face, Lorenz took a deep breath before continuing. "I was, once, but the way he has behaved—" He paused, swallowing hard as he tried to compose himself. "The things he has done. Things he has <i>threatened</i>  to do. I can see now what I was blinkered to for so long. That scoundrel has not an ounce of nobility about him, for all the noble blood that runs in his veins."</p><p>"I see." Claude turned away, his brow creased in thought. "You would betray your own father then?"</p><p>Lorenz scowled. "My allegiance to my father—to my family, and our estate—was cultivated in me at a young age," he said stiffly. "Reinforced, even, these past few years. But I see now that he used my own failings as a rod to beat me. He fanned the flames of my suspicions and jealousy, and I was too blind to see it."</p><p>Claude shook his head. "Children are not to blame for the sins of their parents." He paused. "What of your stepmother? Her children? Is it possible that they too—?"</p><p>Lorenz shook his head. "I do not believe they have any knowledge of my father’s political machinations." </p><p>Claude’s gaze was unreadable. "‘Machinations’ makes it sound like this isn’t just about me." </p><p>An eerie chill ran down Lorenz’s spine. "I do not know the breadth of his plans," he said truthfully. "But it is clear that his actions far surpass any of the healthy debate that the Roundtable encourages. They are nothing short of treason." Lorenz gritted his teeth, his eyes burning as he dropped to a whisper. "By rights, I should hang beside him." </p><p>"Lorenz…"</p><p>"I am not a child, Claude," Lorenz said in a harsh whisper. "I should answer for my actions, or lack of." </p><p>"Hm." Claude shrugged. "Well, we can come to that later. First let's have the whole of it."</p><p>Lorenz hesitated. "What do you mean?"</p><p>"The attack this morning," Claude murmured. His hand went unconsciously to his bandaged side. "This wound. I should have died."</p><p>"I—" Lorenz froze. "I did study a <i>little</i>  Faith magic at the academy, you know. I'm not all fire and brimstone."</p><p>Claude's eyes narrowed. "How long do you think these excuses are going to work on me, Lorenz?"</p><p>Lorenz's throat tightened up, his shoulders stiffening. "I—"</p><p>"You and I are connected somehow," Claude said, his frown deepening. "When are you going to tell me—"</p><p>"My family," Lorenz said, the words out before he knew what to do with them.</p><p>Claude raised an eyebrow, waiting for him to continue.</p><p>Lorenz bowed his head, biting his lip. "You have no reason to show us generosity, but I must beg your mercy..." </p><p>Claude waved his hand with a sigh. "Out with it, Lorenz, what else?" </p><p>"My siblings. And my stepmother." The words fell out of his mouth in a tumble. "My father has threatened to—to harm them. He may kill them." He paused, licking his bottom lip nervously. "They are innocents in this game, nothing more. I must protect them." </p><p>Claude studied him, then nodded. </p><p>Lorenz clasped his hands to hide their trembling and bowed. "You have my gratitude."</p><p>"I don't need gratitude from you," Claude said softly, moving closer to him. Lorenz's skin began to hum, and Claude's frown deepened. "What I need from you is the truth."</p><p>Lorenz closed his eyes. "Claude—" </p><p>"Lorenz, damn it—!" Claude lashed out, snatching at Lorenz's wrist. He wore his gloves once more, but Claude's fingers closed around the bare strip of skin between his glove and his shirtsleeve. Sparks erupted along the length of Lorenz's arm, making all his hair stand on end. Instinctively, he tried to pull away, but Claude held him fast. "Tell me what this means!" </p><p>"I cannot tell you what I do not know," Lorenz said desperately, still trying to wrest his arm from Claude's grip. </p><p>"And I can't protect your family if I don't know what endangers them!" Claude shot back.</p><p>Lorenz growled in frustration. "My <i>father</i>  endangers them!" </p><p>"How?" Claude asked, making a grab for Lorenz's other arm. "Is he going to kill them? Sell them off to slavers?"</p><p>"They should be lucky to be destined for such things!" Lorenz spat. "He would have them altered, as I was!" </p><p>In the ringing silence that followed, Claude abruptly let go of his hand, and Lorenz stumbled backwards, a hand over his mouth. </p><p>"Altered," Claude said, his expression carefully blank. "And just how were you altered, Lorenz?" </p><p>Lorenz shook his head. "The manner of it has no bearing on our conversation," he said shakily, pushing thoughts of dark blood and cavernous dungeons to the back of his mind. "The—the alterations increase strength and power. I was meant to become a leader worthy of the highest seat at the Roundtable." He tugged his sleeve back down and smoothed it over his wrist, avoiding Claude’s gaze. "But he has dispensed with me now, or will, when he learns of my treachery. And since Gloucester has no other crested progeny, my father will seek to rectify that, and I will not—<i>cannot</i>—let that happen."  </p><p>Claude made a soft noise, wrinkling his nose in confusion. "He’s going to...give them crests?" </p><p>"Not so long as I draw breath." Lorenz said firmly.</p><p>Claude's eyes narrowed, making Lorenz feel like a puzzle being picked apart. "But you were born with a crest, were you not?" he asked, his tone thoughtful. "Unless—ah, I see. You have two, don’t you?" </p><p>Lorenz looked away. "Yes," he whispered. He waited for Claude to press him, to ask him to name the second crest, but no such question came. Claude only watched him carefully, thoroughly unnerving him with the force of his stare. With a sigh, Lorenz drew himself up to an approximation of his usual bearing. "And now you are privy to my greatest secret. I only ask for your discretion as to this matter. As to the matter of my father, and my complicity in his deeds—"</p><p>"Lorenz, wait, wait," Claude said, raising his hands. "Yes, of course I wish you'd told me sooner about your suspicions, but that doesn't make you guilty in my eyes."</p><p>"...How can you say that?"</p><p>Claude huffed, a half-smile touching his mouth. "Nobody who wanted me dead would have fought so hard to keep me alive."</p><p>Lorenz swallowed heavily. "You can't possibly know that for certain."</p><p>"No," Claude said, shrugging. "But it's rare that one can be certain about anything. For what it's worth, I think you're a gamble worth taking."</p><p>"I…" Lorenz sagged, shaking his head. "I don't understand you."</p><p>Claude reached out and clasped his shoulder. "I know," he said, treating Lorenz to a crooked smile.</p><p>Lorenz held his gaze for several moments, his thoughts darting back to the kiss they'd shared mere hours ago; to the way Claude's blood had felt, pulsing hot between his fingers. Lorenz cleared his throat carefully. "What do we do now?"</p><p>"Well," Claude said, staring up at the roof of his tent. "You’ve certainly given me a great deal to think about." He sighed, passing his hand over his face briefly. He was still pale and drawn from blood loss and pain, but he clearly had no intention to rest for long. Lorenz was about to withdraw and leave Claude to consider what he'd told him, when Claude suddenly spoke again. "Your father. What would you have me do?"</p><p>"Remove him from the council, of course."</p><p>Claude watched him steadily. "And from Gloucester?"</p><p>Lorenz hesitated. Cutting his father out of the family line would cause a scandal, but it couldn't possibly do more harm than allowing him to keep his position. "He has proven that he has no respect for his position, or for his family. You must do whatever you think is right."</p><p>"I see." Claude didn't look away, his eyes boring into Lorenz. "Do you want me to kill him?"</p><p>Lorenz released a shocked gasp. "<i>What</i>?"</p><p>Claude's expression didn't change. "He's a traitor. Not to mention he's been interfering in crest lineage, which as I understand it, is tacitly outlawed." He paused and gave a disdainful snort. "Not that I see any difference between that and breeding for crest inheritance, but that's another matter."</p><p>"Quite," Lorenz replied faintly. </p><p>Seeing his disquiet, Claude leaned over and placed his hand on Lorenz's arm. "He will stand trial. I'm not the sort of man to make someone disappear in the night just because they've become inconvenient to me."</p><p>Lorenz gave a bitter little laugh. "Then you are a better man than he."</p><p>Claude's frown deepened. "Perhaps." He squeezed Lorenz's arm gently. "What would you have me do?"</p><p>"I—I do not know," Lorenz whispered, looking down at his hands. He thought of his father's coldness when he ordered him away from Fhirdiad, of his disappointment in Lorenz as he spent long months recovering at Hartley Park after his alteration. "I could never have measured up to his expectations for me," he murmured, grimacing at the sick feeling that welled up in his chest. "I wish I had seen it years ago."</p><p>"I know it may be cold comfort," Claude said softly. "But you are ten times the man your father ever was. He may have paid lip service to his noble ideals, but you embody them more truly than anyone I've ever known."</p><p>"Well, there's that," Lorenz said, the words escaping him before he could bite them back. "No—no, I hardly meant it as it sounded," he said hurriedly as Claude scowled. "I only meant…"</p><p>
  <i>That despite my failings and lapses in judgment, perhaps there is still something salvageable from my person?</i>
</p><p>Lorenz looked down at his hands, twisted tightly in his lap. "It matters not. Thank you, Claude." </p><p>After a moment of silence, Claude reached out and brushed his fingers over Lorenz's shoulder. "Go wash up, Gloucester. You have a little time to think on it."</p><p>With a grimace, Lorenz looked down at his bloodstained hands and clothing. "I do look a fright, don't I?" He met Claude's gaze again. "We should leave soon, if you feel up to travelling. We must get you back to the capital and regroup."</p><p>Claude grinned. "Not going to order me back to bed?"</p><p>"Not so long as you <i>rest</i>  another hour or so," Lorenz shot back. "Although I hope you know you shall be travelling in the spare wagon with the rest of the wounded."</p><p>Claude's look of horror cheered him very slightly as he went away to wash off the grime and misery of the morning's skirmish.</p><p> </p><p>— </p><p> </p><p>A flurry of activity followed once they arrived at the capital. With the help of Claude's lieutenant Krenn, Lorenz put it about that they had been attacked by unknown bandits, and made sure that Claude kept out of sight. The plan was for him to lay low and allow the Count to believe that his attempt had been successful, and that Claude would succumb to his wounds, to give him and Lorenz time to move on Gloucester. Over the next few days Claude arranged his troops carefully, while Lorenz had a quiet word with the Lords of the territories bordering and occupying Gloucester. They waited until the Count rode for Derdriu for his quarterly meeting with the Roundtable members, and then Claude's troops moved in, dragging the Count back to Derdriu in chains. </p><p>Astride his horse, Lorenz stared into the distance while his father howled and screamed as he was bundled into a carriage, his hair mussed, clothes ragged from tearing at the chains. The small squad of soldiers his father had brought to accompany him stood, white-faced, against a cliff wall as Claude’s troops patted them down. </p><p>“Mark my words, <i>boy</i>,” the Count spat, red-faced and struggling against his bonds. “You won’t achieve anything without me. Worthless, <i>useless</i>—” </p><p>“At least I have my honour!” Lorenz snapped, before looking away. His father’s incredulous laughter was cut short with a mage’s silencing spell, and muttering a curse under his breath, Lorenz nudged his horse into a trot and rode down the line of troops.</p><p>“My Lord!” </p><p>Lorenz gritted his teeth and reined in his horse at Krenn’s voice, watching the woman impassively as she jogged down the path. </p><p>“Yes, Krenn?” </p><p>“Are you off to Derdriu, then?” </p><p>Lorenz shook his head. “I must return to Hartley Park immediately to take command,” he said. “Please tell the Duke that he shall hear from me shortly, and that whatever instruction he may choose to send will find me at home.”</p><p>Krenn looked uneasy. “And your men, my lord?” </p><p>“I shall round them up presently,” Lorenz said impatiently. “We ride for Hartley at once.” </p><p>Krenn nodded and moved off. Lorenz stared down at his saddle horn. He knew it was cowardly to leave without facing Claude, but he was uncertain that he’d be able to bear the full force of his emotions were he to let them run free just now. </p><p>Gathering his troops, he rode on.</p><p> </p><p>—</p><p> </p><p>In the months that followed, Lorenz removed himself entirely to Hartley Park and dedicated his time to managing the Gloucester estate and territory. There were a great deal of arrangements to be made in order for him to take control of his father's affairs, the first of which was to identify precisely what his father's affairs were, as he'd carried them out with such secrecy for as long as Lorenz could recall. He and Claude corresponded often, with Lorenz taking as much of the work of managing the Alliance off his hands as was possible, to allow Claude to focus on the intricacies of managing the relationships between council members, and—Lorenz had little doubt—coordinating his spies in Kingdom and Empire territories. If Claude was angry at Lorenz for leaving without giving notice, he said nothing about it.</p><p>His father's trial, it seemed, was to be postponed until the entire council could gather again, but Claude issued a writ transferring control of Gloucester and all its assets to Lorenz. Running the Gloucester estate was similar to how his father had made it seem during his lessons: tedious, requiring a great deal of Lorenz’s time, and meticulous in the details of both foreign and domestic affairs. Lorenz found he quite liked the give and take of diplomacy, making it quite clear to House Larissa, their other allies, and his own siblings that Gloucester was now one of Duke Riegan’s most vocal supporters and would back him as such. Adelina and Dirk, for all their young age, solemnly understood the cost of treason. </p><p>As the months wore on, however, Lorenz found himself growing weary. Not a day passed that didn't present some fresh disaster for him to solve, and in addition to the running of the estate and his work supporting Claude and the Alliance, Lorenz had also undertaken the task of tutoring his siblings. After the damage wrought by his father's spies upon Claude's attempted negotiations, Lorenz had become suspicious of his father's entire staff, and particularly those that had been hired in recent years. As such, he'd dismissed the children's tutors without delay, and he and Maya had dedicated themselves fully to their education. </p><p>While it was always enjoyable to spend more time around his siblings, Lorenz had of late begun to find their exuberance and inquisitive natures rather wearing. Giving lessons exhausted him, and made the minutiae of his other work all the more taxing. </p><p>Lorenz was halfway through drafting a letter to an acquaintance in his mind, to beg recommendations for a new tutor, when he was interrupted by another urgent matter that required his immediate attention. Sighing, he took the papers and made his way down the hall to his study, reading it as he went. </p><p>"How on earth are our grain provisions running low so soon?" Lorenz muttered irritably, leafing through the sheaf of reports. "It’s not as though we’ve baked more <i>bread</i>  than usual—ah!" Lorenz shot out a hand to catch himself as a small someone rammed into his legs from behind. Looking down, he saw Hans clinging to his calves with a solemn look. </p><p>"Hello, sweet one," Lorenz cooed. "Would you like to come up?" Hans reached his hands up in a pleading gesture and Lorenz chuckled, hefting him up to sit on his hip. The movement left him curiously faint, and he stumbled against the wall with a gasp as Hans burbled his surprise. </p><p>The feeling passed momentarily, however, and Lorenz shook his head, straightening back up. "How odd," he murmured. "Perhaps I should frequent the training grounds more often instead of dithering over whether to lay up foreign grain." Hans’ fat fist managed to whack him in the face as he flailed, and Lorenz winced, settling the boy lower on his hip. "Quite right." </p><p>"Lorenz!" Twin shrieks echoed down the hall, along with the patter of young feet. Rounding the corner, Lorenz was able to head off Dirk and Adelina as they raced across the polished wooden floors. </p><p>"Hello, darlings," Lorenz said with a smile. "Would you like to join me in the study and learn about <i>foreign policy</i>  while I answer my correspondence?" After the Count’s removal, he’d cleaned and taken over a small study next to the library which had mainly been used for storage, though Lorenz was reasonably certain it had been meant for usage by a priest. He couldn’t bring himself to occupy the dark, looming study that his father had favoured.</p><p>Dirk wrinkled his nose. "No," he said bluntly. "That sounds boring." </p><p>"I would," Adelina said, smiling winningly up at Lorenz. "As long as Dirk won’t be there." </p><p>"That's not <i>fair</i>—!" </p><p>"Alright," Lorenz said, shuffling them towards the study. "We can settle out who sits where when we arrive." </p><p>Dirk whined, tugging at Lorenz’s trousers as Adelina walked backwards and began to object loudly.</p><p>"It’s through that <i>door</i>, Lorenz, why must you—"<br/>
"—and Adelina said that she—!"<br/>
"—not fair that we have to—"</p><p>"Enough!" Lorenz snapped, the thread of his temper worn so thin that it finally broke. "Since you’re not at lessons, you shall sit here quietly, and learn the practicalities of running an estate. My word on this is final!" </p><p>Dirk stumbled back, stepping on Adelina's foot, though she scarcely seemed to notice. Both of them cowered, looking up at him with unfamiliar expressions of horror. For several moments, none of them moved. For his part, Lorenz was so struck by the sight of their pinched, frightened faces that he couldn't speak. He took half a step toward them, and his heart folded in upon itself when Dirk and Adelina both took a step back, reaching for each other's hands. </p><p>And then Adelina's face crumpled, tears springing to her eyes, as she said in a tearful whisper, "You sound like Papa."</p><p>Lorenz froze, quivering, a ghastly pallor rushing across his face as his stomach revolted. "Take your brother," he said hurriedly, shoving Hans into her arms. </p><p>Adelina took him carefully, her eyes wide and fearful. "Please," she whispered, tears spilling down her cheeks. "I—I didn't mean—" </p><p>"Not <i>now</i>," Lorenz hissed, wincing as another wave of nausea and dizziness tore through him. </p><p>Hans began to cry, and Adelina made a helpless attempt to shush him, still staring at Lorenz. </p><p>"I'm so sorry," Lorenz whispered, and staggered as a rush of dizziness briefly blinded him. "I—I fear I—may be indisposed." </p><p>He took two steps forward, reaching for the desk, but his hand never found it. The world tilted sideways as he stumbled and fell, slipping into darkness before he hit the floor.</p><p> </p><p>—</p><p> </p><p>When Lorenz came to, he found himself in his bed, with a powerful thirst and an intense, throbbing pain behind his temples. He opened his eyes slowly, wincing at the light, and groped around for the glass of water he normally kept beside his bed. </p><p>"Careful now," a man's voice soothed, and a gentle hand pressed him back down against his pillow. </p><p>A sudden fear gripped him; he was certain for a moment that he was back in the laboratory. Lorenz tried again to open his eyes, wincing. "Who's there? Why is it so bright?" His voice came out hoarse and croaky, barely above a whisper. </p><p>After a moment, a hand slid beneath his neck, tilting his head up, and he felt the rim of a cup pressed to his lips. He drank slowly, swallowing with difficulty. The water soothed his aching throat somewhat, though he still couldn't quite open his eyes against the glare. </p><p>"What's happened?" he asked, his voice still weak and thready. </p><p>"You were taken ill," the voice replied.</p><p>"Ill?" Lorenz asked, and then he recalled with sudden, miserable clarity the scene in his study, the weariness and frustration that had come over him. "The children," he said in horror, trying to sit up, and opening his eyes despite the terrible glare.</p><p>"Peace," said the man, gently laying a land on his chest again and pressing him firmly back down. "Don't try to get up just yet. You've been very ill, my Lord."</p><p>"How ill?" Lorenz demanded, blinking at the dark figure leaning over him, silhouetted by the light. His eyes began to stream, tears running down his cheeks. "Saints, can't you draw the curtains? I can't see a damn thing."</p><p>There was a pause. "The curtains <i>are</i>  drawn, my Lord," the man replied in a troubled tone. He hesitated before continuing. "Hold, let me turn down the lantern." Lorenz waited as the man moved away, and after a moment the light dimmed to a bearable glow, though his eyes still continued to stream as he held them open. </p><p>"Who are you?" Lorenz asked, trying to draw the sheets to his face to dab his eyes, only to find that his arms were so heavy he could barely lift them. "Why do I feel so weak?"</p><p>"My name is Sommer, and I am a healer. Your stepmother sent for me after you collapsed." Out of the corner of his eye, Lorenz could see Sommer doing something, and then he reached over and covered Lorenz's forehead and eyes with a cool, damp cloth. The relief was immediate, and Lorenz realised that he must have been feverish. "Your stepmother said that you had been working very hard of late," Sommer continued softly. "You have been very dangerously ill, my Lord, this fortnight past."</p><p>Lorenz tensed. "Two weeks?" he hissed. </p><p>"Aye, my Lord." Sommer cleared his throat. "And, begging his Lordship's pardon, but it is my duty to make you well once more, so you shall not stir from this bed until I grant it."</p><p>"But—" Lorenz began, and realised he had no idea where to begin. The business of the estate could do very well without him for a week or so, but the delicate web of diplomacy that he had been balancing could be undone by a mere day's inattention, let alone a fortnight's, to say nothing of the neverending demands of the war effort. "The children," Lorenz blurted, reaching up with some difficulty to push the cloth out of his eyes. "Are they well? They have not become ill?"</p><p>Sommer hushed him gently. "Everyone is in excellent health."</p><p>"Then what is wrong with me? When shall I recover?" </p><p>"That...is hard to say," Sommer admitted, looking uncomfortable. "My colleagues and I have been unable to identify a cause for your illness. That is why rest is so important," he added sternly.</p><p>Lorenz sank back into the pillows in defeat. "Yes. Yes, I quite understand."</p><p>"Take a little more water," Sommer encouraged, reaching for the cup. "And I will have the kitchen prepare something light for your stomach."</p><p>With a sigh, Lorenz submitted to the healer's care. He felt embarrassed that he had been so undone by mere overwork, and resolved to do his utmost to recover quickly. However, over the days that passed, although Lorenz found himself able to sit up in bed, and take one or two hobbling steps across the room, his condition did not much improve. Indeed, he seemed to grow only more ill and fatigued, and no amount of rest seemed to revive him.</p><p>Worse still was the way his siblings seemed intimidated by the myriad of specialists that arrived to poke and prod at him. He had made reparations with Adelina and Dirk the day after he’d woken up, impressing upon them in no certain terms that they would not be subjected to anything like the tyranny of their father’s presence. Still, they were cautious, limiting their visits to hovering in doorways, until the day Sommer brought his pet hedgehog to the estate in his shirt pocket with a conspiratorial wink to Lorenz. Once the children learned that it would fall asleep in their hands if they were just quiet and still enough, they were charmed, and after that they scampered about Lorenz’s room with no trepidation, much to Sommer’s satisfaction.</p><p>"My old master used to say that laughter was the best medicine," he told Lorenz one day, after the children had been shepherded to dinner, "and your brothers and sister seem to do little else when they're around you."</p><p>Lorenz smiled. "That's as may be, and they do cheer me up, but I'm afraid they seem to be doing little for my constitution." </p><p>"Have patience," Sommer told him. "And stop trying to work so much when you're supposed to be resting. Nothing goes on in a sickroom that I don't hear about, you know."</p><p>"...Very well," Lorenz muttered, though he had no intention of giving up what little work he could manage from his bed.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>man...wouldn't it be really awful if lorenz didn't get better :3c</p><p> </p><p>remember you can share the fic on twitter for us if you wanna! <a href="https://twitter.com/notallbees/status/1284222548499144705">bees</a> and <a href="https://twitter.com/JaneBuzJane/status/1284458426014355456">jane</a> :3</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Chapter 7</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It had been several weeks since his initial collapse, and Lorenz was still mostly confined to his bed, though he'd managed once—with assistance—to make his way along the hall to the nursery to eat supper with the children. The exertion had left him ill for days afterwards, and set back his recovery 'at least a week' according to a stern-faced Sommer. Still, he was determined not to be beaten, and was at that moment reading through some reports on recent trade disputes which had been forwarded to him by his assistant in Derdriu. </p><p>It was a cool autumn day, and Lorenz's open window allowed in a faint breeze which carried the scent of woodsmoke. He dearly missed being able to walk the grounds of the estate, and in particular longed for the singular joy to be found in riding through the early morning mist, or watching the sunset from the hill above the house. </p><p>"I know something you don't know."</p><p>Lorenz looked up from his papers with a weary smile at Dirk, who was playing on the floor with Hans in his lap. "Is that so, my dear?"</p><p>Dirk directed a gap-toothed grin at him. "Mamma told me a secret."</p><p>"Ma-ma-ma," Hans echoed, wriggling in Dirk's lap.</p><p>"That's right, little one!" Lorenz encouraged. "Say 'Mama'." </p><p>Hans giggled. "Ma-ma-ma!"</p><p>Since Lorenz had taken up residence at Hartley Park once more, Hans had finally begun to speak, and his brother and sister usually took great delight in encouraging him. Lorenz had little doubt that he would be cursing like a sailor before the year was out with their influence, and firmly resolved to keep him away from the more colourful language of the stablehands. </p><p>"Lor<i>enz</i>," Dirk whined, drawing out his name. </p><p>Lorenz laughed softly. "What do you know that I don't know, my dear?"</p><p>Dirk beamed. "Can't tell." </p><p>"Oh, dear," Lorenz said, with an exaggerated pout. "You can't even tell <i>me</i>?"</p><p>"<i>Especially</i>  not you," Dirk said, looking exceedingly proud of himself. </p><p>Lorenz chuckled. "Then you'd better not tell me, I wouldn't want to upset your mother."</p><p>"Ma-ma-ma-ma," chanted Hans, clapping his hands together. </p><p>Dirk opened his mouth to reply, but they were interrupted suddenly by a commotion from downstairs. The dogs all began barking, and excited voices carried up the stairs and along the hallway to his open door. </p><p>"What on earth could that be?" Lorenz murmured, putting aside his report. He glanced to Dirk, but the boy had abandoned his brother on the floor and rushed to the window, his face shining with glee. "Dirk, what is it? Pirates? An Almyran raiding party?"</p><p>Dirk turned to him, laughing. "Your surprise!" he bubbled. Then, snatching up his little brother and hefting him in his arms, he hurried from the room. </p><p>Lorenz stared after him in wonderment. "What in Fódlan…" he murmured aloud. Pushing aside his blankets, he seized the walking cane beside his bed, and with difficulty, crossed the room to the window. Even walking those few steps made him dizzy and breathless, and he leaned heavily against the sill as he peered out through the glass. Down below, taking up most of the lawn, was an enormous albino wyvern. Lorenz stared. "What the—"</p><p>Sudden footsteps outside his bedroom made him turn, almost losing his balance, and he clung heavily to the windowsill to support himself. There was a knock on the open door, and when Lorenz called for them to enter, his valet stepped inside. The man was clearly flushed from hurrying. "If you please, milord," he said, clearly doing his best to restrain his excitement. "Her Ladyship wishes me to inform you that Duke Riegan has arrived."</p><p>Lorenz gave a shocked, bewildered huff of laughter. "Well of course he has," he said, resisting the urge to roll his eyes. "I see my letters have had no effect in putting him off. I suppose you had better send him in as soon as he’s settled." </p><p>"I hope you're decent, Lorenz!" Claude’s voice called up the stairs. Heavy footsteps followed, undoubtedly meant to give him time to prepare for his entry, as Claude’s normal gait was as silent as a cat's. Lorenz groaned, covering his face to hide his smile, and sank into the chair beside his window. </p><p>"Perhaps the bed, my Lord?" his valet suggested. "Healer Sommer did say—" </p><p>"I refuse to look an invalid in front of Duke Riegan," Lorenz said, hastily tying his hair back in some sort of order. "Though a pot of tea would not go amiss, if you would ask the maid." </p><p>The valet bowed. "Shall I tell the Duke you're expecting him?"</p><p>"Expecting him!" Lorenz burst out. "Ha! Tell him whatever you will, just allow me two minutes of peace to ready myself first."</p><p>Smiling, the man withdrew, pulling the door closed behind him to give Lorenz a moment of privacy. </p><p>Lorenz frowned, retying his hair again, then paused, dragging his fingers through the fine strands. It had thinned during his illness; perhaps he ought to keep it loose so he didn't seem so ill…? </p><p>Cursing himself for a fool, he left it as it was, neatly tied, then smoothed down his dressing gown. After a moment's reflection, he tweaked it so the embroidery on the pocket showed. It would not do for Claude's first impression of him after months of separation to be of a slovenly wretch. </p><p>Lorenz used his walking cane to shove a few loose papers under the bed, inadvertently toppling a stack of farming almanacs in the process. With a hiss of frustration, he kicked them aside ineffectually, and straightened up in his seat just as the door opened. </p><p>"Hello, Lorenz?"  </p><p>"Claude," Lorenz said, a smile chasing over his face at the sound of Claude's voice. </p><p>Claude looked so out of place, standing in his doorway, that for a moment Lorenz felt he might have been dreaming. Then Claude smiled, his face lighting up and his eyes crinkling, and a pleasurable warmth poured down Lorenz's spine.</p><p>"There you are," Claude said, beaming at him as he drew off his gauntlets and closed the door behind him. He was red-cheeked and windswept, his hair a bird's nest, and it was clear that he'd barely stopped to greet Maya and the children before making his way up to see Lorenz. </p><p>"To what do I owe this <i>unexpected</i>  pleasure?" Lorenz asked, arching an eyebrow at him.</p><p>Claude beamed. "I thought I'd come and cheer you up. Your stepmother told me—"</p><p>As Claude began to walk toward him, heat and light suddenly burst under Lorenz's skin, setting his nerves ablaze. Lorenz stiffened with a gasp, his cane falling out of his hand and clattering on the floorboards. His entire body <i>thrummed</i>, as though it would threaten to shake apart if Claude stepped any closer. It was like the first time they'd touched, back in the hayloft, brilliant and all-consuming. </p><p>"Lorenz, what—" Claude began, his brow crumpling in concern. But then his expression changed, his eyes widening to mirror Lorenz's surprise when he took another step and a shock went through him. He stumbled forward, catching himself on the bedpost before he could tumble into Lorenz's lap. "It's happening again," Claude whispered, looking up into Lorenz's eyes.</p><p>Lorenz nodded. He had foregone wearing his gloves since he'd been confined to his bed, and he reached out now without thinking, seeking something he could not define. He felt like a string drawn taut, and whether he may snap, or be snipped in two, he didn't care. </p><p>Claude reached for his hand and grasped it tightly, pulling Lorenz flush against his chest and wrapping his arms tight around him. </p><p>Despite how tightly Claude held him, Lorenz heaved what felt like his first full breath in half a year. Nourishing air filled his lungs, bringing with it the scent of Claude's leather armour, and the warm comforting scent of his hair and skin. </p><p>"Lorenz," Claude whispered brokenly, sliding a hand into his hair to cradle Lorenz's cheek against his chest. "Flames, I was so worried when I heard."</p><p>Lorenz laughed weakly, but he made no attempt to pull away. He realised that over the past weeks he'd resigned himself to never experiencing such comfort again, and certainly not from Claude. "Fear not," he said after a few moments, pulling away from Claude reluctantly. "I would have ensured my affairs were taken care of, you wouldn't have been left to untangle all these trade disputes alone."</p><p>"Hang the trade disputes!" Claude said, wrinkling his nose and drawing attention to the smattering of freckles across his nose and cheeks. "Lorenz, I—" He broke off, shaking his head, and instead reached for Lorenz's hand again. Lorenz's heart began to hammer as Claude lifted his hand and pressed a soft kiss against the heel of his palm, his mouth lingering for several seconds before he finally drew back. "I am glad to see you."</p><p>Lorenz stared at him, his heart beating so hard that he began to feel lightheaded. "I—"</p><p>"Forgive me," Claude said with a faint smile. "You know I can't resist teasing you."</p><p>"Yes," Lorenz said, snatching his hand back to his lap as warmth rushed to his cheeks. "I am quite aware."</p><p>Claude's smile widened. "That's better. A little colour suits you."</p><p>Lorenz tutted. "Is this your idea of cheering me up?"</p><p>"It's a start," Claude said, getting to his feet again. "Now, I think it's about time you got some sunshine."</p><p>"Are you a healer now?" Lorenz asked, arching an eyebrow at him. </p><p>"I'm not <i>not</i>  one." </p><p>"Claude," Lorenz said, trying not to smile. </p><p>Claude grinned. "Lorenz." </p><p>"Oh, very well," Lorenz sighed, recognising an argument he wouldn't win. "Would you pass me my cane?" he asked, gesturing to it. </p><p>Claude obliged him, and Lorenz gritted his teeth as he slowly levered himself to his feet, leaning heavily on his cane. He sensed Claude lingering close by, perhaps ready to catch him if he fell, which as far as Lorenz was concerned would be one indignity too many. Luckily, however, his lightheadedness seemed to have passed, and he was able to take a few wobbling steps without too much difficulty. </p><p>"What do you think?" Claude urged gently, offering his arm. "Could you handle a stroll in the garden?"</p><p>A smile tugged at the corner of Lorenz's mouth. "Perhaps," he agreed, slipping his hand into the crook of Claude's elbow. "Perhaps a very brief one."</p><p>With Claude supporting him, he and Lorenz made their way downstairs, and Lorenz directed him out to the terrace, where his mother's roses used to grow. He'd begun replacing the borders with assistance from the head gardener, but in truth he'd been so preoccupied since returning to Hartley that he'd scarcely made a dent in the work that needed doing. </p><p>They took a few turns around the terrace, by which point Lorenz began to feel fatigued. Claude helped him to a bench, and they chatted as they watched clouds dapple the surface of the small pond filled with exotic fish, which his father had purchased at some point to please Maya. </p><p>"How go your duties in Derdriu?" Lorenz asked, when their idle chatter fell into a brief lull. </p><p>"As well as they ever have," Claude said, raising his face to the sun. </p><p>Lorenz rapped Claude’s shins with his cane. "No need to be cryptic, Claude, I am one of your top advisors. Your written reports are well-meaning but shrouded in mystery."</p><p>"Right, what was I thinking?" Claude chuckled. "The Lords give me as much trouble as ever. You’ll have to make it for a session in person one of these days, you know. They’ve forgotten how to argue without you." </p><p>"I shall give my best effort." In truth, Lorenz longed to be in Derdriu, conducting business as usual, even for just a short reprieve. Bed rest was, in itself, exhausting, and he confided this to Claude with a sigh.</p><p>"Then I'm sure you’ll be up and about in no time, through stubbornness alone."</p><p>Lorenz laughed weakly. "Perhaps."</p><p>Claude gave his arm an encouraging squeeze. "Well, I came here to cheer you up, and that I still intend to do. We'll have you well before you know it, and you can go back to questioning every decision I make, and doing your utmost to irritate me at every turn."</p><p>"I can do those things very well from my bed, if it gives you so much pleasure," Lorenz replied with a sarcastic smile. </p><p>A sly look overtook Claude's features as he turned. "Is that so?" he murmured, pitching his voice lower. "I should be very happy to be pleasured by you in bed."</p><p>"Oh, for Cichol's sake," Lorenz sighed, shoving him away in hopes of disguising his blush. "At least mind your foolish flirtation around the children, won't you?"</p><p>"My apologies," Claude said, still laughing. "Where are they, anyway? I've been looking forward to meeting them properly, you talk of them so much in your letters."</p><p>"Do I really?" Lorenz asked, his embarrassment forgotten. "I hadn't realised."</p><p>Claude smiled. "It's a credit to you as their older brother. It's heartening to see how close you all are."</p><p>"I suppose we are lucky that my father never pitched us against one another," Lorenz agreed, his face falling as he continued, "though I suspect that he might have, as they grew older."</p><p>"Yes," Claude murmured, his face darkening. He turned to look out over the garden. "I would not wish that on anyone. Most younger siblings don't have the fortune of being blessed with an older brother as thoughtful and caring as you are."</p><p>Lorenz huffed. "I think you must be teasing me again. Raphael's younger sister is blessed with the most doting brother anyone could ask for, and Hilda too, for Lord Goneril is dedicated to her happiness."</p><p>"Oh yes," Claude said, laughing again. "Poor Hilda. I think she feels sometimes that Holst loves her a little <i>too</i>  well, he's always telling her off for being lazy." He chuckled. "I suppose someone has to do it."</p><p>"Quite," Lorenz said, hiding a smile. "But—what of you? The way you talk, it makes it sound as though you had troublesome siblings of your own."</p><p>Claude laughed. "Troublesome isn't the word for it. My siblings couldn't have been more grateful to see the back of me."</p><p>"Indeed?" Lorenz asked, looking at him in surprise, but Claude seemed disinclined to offer anything further on the subject, his eyes narrowed and his mouth a thin line as he stared out over the garden. Lorenz cleared his throat. "Well, family can be a strain. But we should go and call for the children, I'm sure they have been dying to meet you."</p><p> </p><p>—</p><p> </p><p>The following day, Lorenz woke up feeling refreshed for the first time in weeks. He realised that he'd been feeling fatigued for months, since long before his illness. At the time he'd dismissed it as symptomatic of his heavy workload, yet when he found himself able to rise and dress without needing to call for his valet or one of the healers to assist him, he realised for the first time just how severely he'd been impacted by it. It was a relief to feel that he might be on the mend at last, and he was already cheerful when he made his way somewhat unsteadily down to breakfast and found Maya and Claude in animated conversation. His heart warmed to see them, and he lingered in the doorway a moment before entering. </p><p>"Lorenz!" Maya exclaimed, starting up from her seat. She hurried over to support him. "What on earth are you doing out of bed?"</p><p>"Please, Maya," Lorenz said, laughing weakly. "I am well enough, as you see. I will not be prevented from showing the Duke my hospitality."</p><p>Maya huffed. "Oh, Duke Riegan, please don't let him overtax himself."</p><p>Claude laughed. "If I thought I had any power to influence him, I would promise you, but alas…" He winked at Lorenz. "He always does exactly what he thinks is best, no matter my thoughts on the subject."</p><p>"And I shall continue to do so," Lorenz said expansively, refusing to be baited by Claude's teasing. He'd learned his lesson on that the previous afternoon. </p><p>"I wouldn't have you otherwise," Claude said, grinning at him.</p><p>Over the next few days, Lorenz watched with fond resignation as his entire family fell irrevocably in love with Claude, who effortlessly charmed the whole household, from Maya and the children down to the stablehands and scullery maids. It was fascinating to watch the suspicion that had been bred in them by Lorenz's father quickly melt away in the face of Claude's easy charm. He was a particular favourite of Adelina, who to Lorenz and Maya's surprise had lost her usual forthrightness entirely, and instead would blush and stammer whenever Claude spoke to her. </p><p>Several days later, Lorenz and Maya sat together in the garden, watching Claude take the children up one by one on the back of his wyvern. He'd been instructed not to fly too high with them, although all three enjoyed the experience so much that they each clamoured for more after their turn was finished. Even Adelina stopped blushing long enough to demand another turn.</p><p>"She's at that age, I suppose," Maya replied with a sigh when Lorenz raised Adelina's behaviour.</p><p>Lorenz glanced away. "I suppose she is. Although I wish she wouldn't be so foolish over <i>Claude</i>  of all people." He sniffed. "I am sure he's done nothing to deserve it."</p><p>Maya laughed. "You know, my dear, you have been altogether a different person since Duke Riegan arrived."</p><p>Lorenz looked at her askance. "Whatever can you mean by that, Maya?" he asked with a puzzled smile. </p><p>Maya laughed. "Do you not see it?" she asked, and reaching out, she brushed a stray lock of hair behind his ear. "You have come alive again since he arrived. In truth, I—" She paused, her expression drawn.</p><p>"What is it?" he pressed gently. </p><p>Maya looked at him, her eyes fearful. When she spoke again, her voice trembled. "Sommer...he asked us not to let you know how gravely ill you were, not until you had recovered somewhat."</p><p>Fear struck him like a bell. "What do you mean?"</p><p>Maya winced. "We almost lost you, Lorenz."</p><p>His eyes widened. "But I thought—surely it was just a fever?"</p><p>She shook her head. "The healers—they said there was nothing that could be done. Only to make you comfortable." She bit her lip, and Lorenz was horrified to note tears springing to her eyes. "It was as though you were just fading away before our eyes." </p><p>"I—I see," Lorenz said hoarsely, turning to stare out across the garden. A sick ache began to curl in his chest, and down into his gut. Perhaps this was what he'd so long feared; his time was running out, and all before he'd even seen an end to this foolish war. "Maya," he said urgently, turning to her and clasping her hand. "I beg of you, do not speak of this to anyone." He paused, licking his bottom lip nervously. "Particularly—not to the Duke."</p><p>"Whatever for?" she asked. "I am sure Duke Riegan wants to know precisely what has happened to you. Why—if he doesn't know, perhaps he may allow you to take too much upon yourself again, and then where shall you be?"</p><p>Lorenz shook his head. "Please, Maya—I beg you, he cannot know. I promise that I shall not overtax myself again, but please—"</p><p>"Peace, Lorenz," she said, taking his hand between both of hers and squeezing it firmly. Her eyes were wide and frightened, but she held his gaze steadily. "I promise, I would not betray you. If I must keep this a secret, then I shall."  </p><p>Lorenz breathed out slowly. "Thank you. I am sorry to press you, but it is a matter of great importance that he not find out."</p><p>Maya's brow creased, and she tilted her head to one side, pouting. "I wish I could say that I understood matters between the two of you," she said. "But if there's one thing I know, it is what a man looks like when he's in love."</p><p>"...<i>What</i>?" Lorenz hissed, snatching his hand away from her, and staring at her aghast. "W-whatever do you mean?"</p><p>She laughed, not unkindly. "Lorenz, dearest," she said in a soft, motherly tone. </p><p>"No, no," Lorenz said, getting up from his seat and turning away from her. "It is quite impossible."</p><p>"Why should it be impossible?" she asked, laughter in her voice. "Surely you don't still intend to wed the Daphnel girl?"</p><p>Lorenz didn't look up from his agitated pacing. "No, no, of course not—and thank you, I must write to her—but that is not at all the issue! Claude and I—to suggest that I am—" He sighed and shook his head. "No, it is madness, we barely tolerate one another—"</p><p>"Lorenz, please," Maya said, reaching out to him. "Please, be seated, and calm yourself. I assure you I did not mean to upset you. Please sit, before you make yourself ill again."</p><p>Sighing, Lorenz relented, and came to sit beside his stepmother once more, although his thoughts were still a jumble. </p><p>"I'd better go and rescue Claude before they lay siege to him," Maya said, patting his knee before rising to go over to the children, who had crowded Claude back against his wyvern's flank as they pestered him with questions. </p><p>Lorenz watched them, unseeing, his mind racing. He felt as if he were a cobweb that had been doused with dew and frozen overnight, revealed with the sunrise to be a solid, crystalline structure. He saw himself, his recent actions, with a new kind of clarity that left him feeling small and foolish. Could it be possible that he harboured such feelings, and that they had escaped even his own notice?</p><p>He was quiet at dinner that evening, reflecting on Maya's words, his own behaviour. He didn't think he'd behaved differently toward Claude than he had with anyone else, except for the strange coincidence of their crests. And, aside from the first instance of contact between them back at Garreg Mach, it wasn't as though they'd had any other...encounters of that nature. He remembered with a pang the force of the attraction when Claude had first arrived at Hartley Park, and the kiss they'd shared in Claude's tent after Lorenz healed him. Still, though the memories embarrassed him, it proved that any attraction between them was born of the affinity between their crests, and nothing more. </p><p>"You've been quiet this evening," Claude observed, after Maya went upstairs to tuck the children into bed, and the two of them retired to the terrace. </p><p>Lorenz started. "Oh—have I?" he said, feigning disinterest.  </p><p>Claude reached out to him. "Give me your hand."</p><p>Lorenz frowned back. "Whatever for?"</p><p>"Trust me," Claude said, winking at him.</p><p>"I really ought to know better by now," Lorenz sighed, stretching out his hand, "particularly when you have that devilish look about you."</p><p>Claude hummed. "Yes, you ought." He grasped Lorenz's wrist, then without ceremony he caught the fingertips of Lorenz's glove and pulled it off neatly.</p><p>"Claude—!" Lorenz protested.</p><p>"As I thought," Claude murmured, turning Lorenz's wrist and examining his hand. "You have a spot of blood on your glove that wasn't there this morning."</p><p>Lorenz stared at him, then down at the small cut on his hand. "I—I was tending the roses."</p><p>Claude tutted softly. "Dear me." He ran his thumb over the stinging cut, and Lorenz suppressed a shiver at the flicker of gold that coursed under his skin. "Maybe I can heal it for you."</p><p>"I thought you didn't know any Faith magic," Lorenz whispered. </p><p>Claude raised an eyebrow at him. "I didn't think I needed any," he murmured, and then he lowered his face to Lorenz's hand and kissed it, right over the cut from the thorn. Lorenz whimpered at the sparks that surged up his arm, and Claude cut his gaze up to him, his eyes warm with intent. </p><p>"Enough," Lorenz said, pulling his hand away and reaching for his discarded glove. Foolishly, he glanced at Claude, who had a puzzled look on his face. "My apologies," Lorenz muttered, looking away as he tugged the glove back on.</p><p>"I noticed you've started wearing those again since I arrived," Claude murmured. </p><p>Lorenz froze. "I—" he began, trailing off uselessly. </p><p>"Did you ever think of leaving them off?" Claude asked, still watching him intently.</p><p>Lorenz hesitated. "What do you mean?" he asked, pretending not to understand.</p><p>Claude's gaze shuttered, and he forced a smile. "Nothing. Forget it."</p><p>Feeling like a coward, Lorenz closed his mouth, and turned away.</p><p> </p><p>—</p><p> </p><p>Despite Lorenz's reservations, and the lingering discomfort that Maya's words had stirred in him, he and Claude spent the rest of the week in each other's company almost from dawn until dusk. Some of that time they spent working, as each could only escape their responsibilities for so long, although it was a comfort to have Claude nearby to sound out ideas or problems once again, as Lorenz had become accustomed to when they were together in Derdriu. </p><p>His strength returned to him daily, such that he and Claude were finally able to go riding together one afternoon. Away from the bustle of the house and the pressing work that needed attending to, the air was more strained between them, their conversation stilted. Lorenz was aware that the problem lay chiefly with him, and after their return he slipped away to steal a little time to compose himself.</p><p>The greenhouse was sweltering, even at twilight, as Lorenz carefully repotted a fragile bloom. But although it was warm, it was peaceful, at least until Claude found him a short while later. </p><p>"Knock knock?" Claude’s voice rang out. He was framed in the soft silhouette of the setting sun, grinning softly. "Your stepmother sent me to fetch you for dinner."</p><p>"Ah yes," Lorenz said, trying to ignore the way his heart turned over in his chest at Claude's easy grin. "Please, come in," he said, drawing on a smile. He made space on the bench he was seated on, but Claude strolled over and propped his elbows on the table instead, inspecting the tiny plant. </p><p>"Where’d you find this one? Looks a little young to be in your garden." </p><p>"That would be why it’s in the greenhouse, yes," Lorenz said, raising an eyebrow. </p><p>Claude snorted. "I see, it's going to be one of <i>those</i>  conversations, is it?"</p><p>Frowning, Lorenz shook his head. "No, forgive me—it is one that I…managed to rescue," Lorenz admitted. "From my mother’s garden. It seems the head gardener took a few cuttings when my father ordered them to rip out all the beds that she planted, and I have been attempting to propagate them. I aspire to one day return the gardens to their former glory." </p><p>"I see. Well, I think this makes a fine start," Claude said, patting the pot. Silence fell. </p><p>Lorenz found his gaze roving over Claude’s face, taking in each tiny detail, from the nick on his ear to the gleam in his eye. His skin glowed in the slanting, scarlet-tinged sunlight that filtered through the glass, and Lorenz found his eye drawn to Claude's slender neck, watching as a bead of sweat rolled down from his hairline, and down into the soft cotton of his shirt collar. </p><p>"I must return to Derdriu tomorrow," Claude said finally, breaking the silence.</p><p>Guiltily, Lorenz darted his gaze back to Claude's face. "Of course. I'm grateful they could spare you for so long."</p><p>"I hope you will not be far behind me." Claude looked over at him, his expression unreadable. "Your hair's getting long," he murmured, and before Lorenz could respond, Claude was already reaching out. He caught a loose strand of Lorenz's hair and twirled it around his finger, the white strands making a stark contrast against his darker skin. </p><p>Heat rose to Lorenz's cheeks, a faint shimmer of sensation running up to his scalp from Claude's fingers, but he didn't pull away. "I confess the length isn’t quite what I am accustomed to," he said demurely. "I should never have let it grow so long had I not been ill." </p><p>"Don't change it," Claude murmured, giving the lock of hair a gentle tug before releasing him. "It suits you."</p><p>Lorenz floundered. "A-and what of you? Do you intend to keep that untidy, childish mop forever?"</p><p>Claude snorted and gave Lorenz a light shove, sending another current of trembling heat between them and causing Lorenz to shiver. "Long hair would look terrible on me, and you know it," Claude retorted. "I know you're just trying to better yourself at my expense." </p><p>"A beard, then," Lorenz suggested. "Perhaps it would lend credence to your Roundtable arguments. Count Oritz might be a little more intimidated, don't you think?" </p><p>"I don’t know, Lorenz," Claude murmured, leaning closer again. "What do <i>you</i>  think?" </p><p>"I'm not going to repeat myself," Lorenz said tartly. "A full beard by the time I next see you or I shall be very disappointed."</p><p>Claude smiled. "I should hate to disappoint you." He propped his chin in his hand, watching as Lorenz busied himself with the next of his cuttings. "How about you? I think you'd look rather distinguished with a beard."</p><p>Lorenz laughed, trying to ignore the weight of Claude's gaze on him. "I rather suspect that a white beard would age me beyond my years."</p><p>"Perhaps," Claude said, looking away, his gaze straying beyond the glass to the encroaching dusk. "Do you fear growing old, Lorenz?"</p><p>Lorenz froze, the question tearing through him like an arrow. For a moment, he wondered if Claude had divined his secret, but Claude was still watching the last gleam of the sunset, his posture relaxed. "No," Lorenz managed, his voice tight. "No, I—I think I should very much like to grow old."</p><p>Claude glanced at him, a faint crease between his brows. After a moment he smiled softly. "With a lover at your side, I'm sure."</p><p>A burning filled Lorenz's throat and scalded the backs of his eyes. He turned away, clapping one soiled hand over his mouth to stifle the sob that threatened to escape. He knew there was no hiding his reaction from Claude, and a wash of humiliation came over him. He wrapped the other hand around himself, holding himself together tightly, as though he would fall apart without it.</p><p>"...Lorenz?" Claude stepped around the end of the table. "Have I upset you?"</p><p>Lorenz shook his head furiously, even as hot tears spilled onto his cheeks. He'd thought he'd made peace with his shortened lifespan. He'd felt relief at ending his engagement, knowing that he wouldn't be forced to leave behind a young widow and a fatherless child, yet he couldn't deny that a part of him longed for companionship, even if love was impossible. </p><p>Claude moved closer. Lorenz felt the shiver of his nearness. "Lorenz," Claude said, his voice achingly soft. </p><p>"I'm sorry," Lorenz said thickly, sliding his hand up to cover his eyes with his sleeve. "I'm so sorry, I—"</p><p>"Lorenz," Claude said again. Reaching up, he gently clasped Lorenz's wrist and drew it away from his face. </p><p>"No, please," Lorenz muttered, trying to turn away. He couldn't bear to be seen in such a state, particularly not by Claude, but then Claude touched his jaw very gently, cupping his cheek, smoothing away a tear with his thumb. </p><p>"I'm the one who should say sorry," Claude whispered. Dragging his blurry gaze up to Claude's face, Lorenz was surprised to see the hurt in his eyes, though it was gone a moment later. Claude sighed, shaking his head slightly. "If I—if we were different people—" Claude broke off, pressing his lips tightly together. </p><p>Lorenz gave a wet, sorrowful chuckle. "If," he echoed, shaking his head, and dislodging Claude's hand. "That is quite enough of that, Claude von Riegan." He stepped back, and drew a handkerchief from his pocket with trembling fingers to wipe his face with. "Please, tell Maya I shall be a little late for supper, and not to wait."</p><p>Wordlessly, Claude stepped away from him. "As you wish."</p><p>He bowed, and then he was gone, leaving Lorenz alone in the greenhouse as darkness began to fall in earnest.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>okay LOOK</p><p>we did say it would be a SLOW burn, please don't throw things</p><p>please do <a href="#section0007">share on twit</a> if you're enjoying!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Chapter 8</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>thanks for sticking with us, we're having a blast!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Lorenz's recovery continued swiftly after Claude's departure, and once he was fully well again, he began dividing his time between Gloucester and Derdriu. Things were more or less under control in Gloucester in any case, which allowed him to focus on the growing tensions between the Alliance and Adrestia, not to mention the strained relationships on the council. </p><p>Things between Claude and Lorenz were, unfortunately, just as difficult. Claude had treated him much more coolly since quitting Hartley Park several months earlier. There was not even the heat of their usual bickering; instead, Claude held him at arm's length, turning to him often for the advice of his office, but never the comfort of his friendship. </p><p>As the date of what would have been the Millennium festival at Garreg Mach drew near, Lorenz found himself lost in wistful thought on more than one occasion. Claude happened upon him one day when he was lost in reverie, and paused beside him to look out of the window. </p><p>"What are you thinking of?" Claude asked after a few moments.</p><p>Lorenz cleared his throat, blinking away memories of lessons in sunlit classrooms, of the easy camaraderie of the dining hall and the peace of the cathedral. "Brighter days," he murmured, glancing sidelong at Claude. "You?"</p><p>Claude smiled faintly. "For once, we're in accord." He sighed, putting out a hand to lean against the wall. "Do you suppose...is it foolish to hope that the Professor is still out there somewhere?"</p><p>"Oh," Lorenz sighed, Claude's obvious sorrow making his heart clench momentarily. "No, I do not think it foolish at all."</p><p>"I know it may be a wasted journey," Claude said quietly, "and I won't deny there's risk involved, but...I'm going to go back there. I have to."</p><p>Lorenz nodded. "I can hold down matters here."</p><p>Claude looked at him askance. "You're not coming?"</p><p>"I—" </p><p>"It wouldn't be the same without you there."</p><p>Lorenz looked down at his hands. "Perhaps I can make the time. Do you think the others will be there too?"</p><p>Claude hummed softly. "I hope so."</p><p>"I am certain they will be," Lorenz said, with more conviction than he felt. It was a long time since he'd heard from most of their former classmates, and much had changed in the five years since the war began. </p><p>Claude was silent for a moment. “You miss it, then?” </p><p>Lorenz laughed lightly as he looked out at the waves crashing against the craggy rocks of the Derdriu beaches. “Of course. I think—in some ways at least, I was happiest there. There's little about the academy that I don't miss."</p><p>“I see,” Claude said. His fingers tapped a rhythm on the windowsill as he stared at Lorenz with a half-smile that concealed more than it revealed. “I’ll let you get packing, then. I’m sure you have things to arrange before you leave.” </p><p>With that, he left, leaving Lorenz with a dozen unspoken thoughts glued to the back of his throat.</p><p> </p><p>—</p><p> </p><p>Claude's boundless joy at being reunited with Professor Byleth was as infectious as it was obvious, and it made for a merry atmosphere as they all began to settle into the monastery once more. </p><p>Raphael’s booming voice echoed around the courtyard as he welcomed another wave of arrivals to Garreg Mach. Despite his trepidation, Lorenz’s lips twitched into a smile. It was hard to be solemn around Raphael. The two of them had volunteered to help welcome and settle the returning Knights and previous inhabitants, and it had been a busy morning. Lorenz was just about to suggest that they take a break and refresh themselves, when he heard Claude's cheerful shout ringing out behind him, and looked up to see Claude's cousin Judith riding up through the gates. Claude strode past Lorenz to greet her, and they both laughed as they clasped forearms once she'd dismounted. </p><p>Lorenz smiled at the sight, heartened to see Claude in such good spirits, although his good feeling wavered when Judith leaned in to whisper in Claude's ear, before cutting her gaze across to Lorenz. Claude nodded and patted her shoulder, then moved off. </p><p>Uneasy, Lorenz couldn't help but wonder whether they'd been discussing him, or it had just been a coincidence. He wondered if Claude had made Judith aware of Lorenz's complicity in the plan to overthrow him. Or, rather, as much as it pained Lorenz to admit it: the plan to <i>assassinate</i>  him. She already thought so low of him, and indeed, he’d proven her original assumption about his morals correct. </p><p>Making a face, turned away to busy himself with something else, before coming to a very abrupt stop when something snagged the back of his shirt. Lorenz turned, his mouth open in protest, before he looked down and recognised Lysithea, no taller, but certainly more grown up than the last time he'd seen her. </p><p>"Why, Lysithea," he said, breaking into a smile. "How wonderful to see you."</p><p>She released his shirt and propped her hands on her hips. Lorenz had the sudden suspicion that he was about to get a firm scolding.</p><p>"You look old," Lysithea informed him, in lieu of a greeting. "Old<i>er</i>, I guess." </p><p>Lorenz frowned, irritable at the reminder of the trickling hourglass that shadowed his every step. "Thank you," he said, rather curtly. "Time passes in a linear fashion for us all, Lysithea." </p><p>"I just meant—" She scowled, cutting herself off. "I’m happy to see you." </p><p>Taking in the way she fiddled with her hair, Lorenz softened abruptly. She suffered from his same affliction, and perhaps it was a comfort to her that he had not yet succumbed to its mortal effects. "I am happy to see you too, Lysithea."</p><p>She nodded. "I suppose you haven’t made any progress with your, um…" She trailed off, glancing around them surreptitiously. "With your <i>you know what</i>?" </p><p>"I have not," Lorenz said, in a tone of finality. "And I have no intention to do so. What’s done is done, Lysithea, I told you that years ago." </p><p>She huffed. "Aren’t you supposed to be wiser as you get older? I’ve been writing to Linhardt about it. All hypothetically, of course, but he thinks that there’s something to be done." </p><p>"If anyone had any insight into our plight, it would be Linhardt,” Lorenz said diplomatically.</p><p>Lysithea rolled her eyes. "I’m going to get nothing out of you right now, am I? We’ll talk later," she said stoutly, and Lorenz bowed as she moved off.</p><p>Making his excuses to Raphael, Lorenz left the bustle of the courtyard and made his way to the stables so that he could seek a few moments' peace. He'd been plagued by nightmares in the short few days since his and Claude's return to Garreg Mach, and sleep had been elusive. He found Aplani in her stall, looking decidedly untidy, and grumbled halfheartedly before beginning the process of grooming her himself. The occupation was soothing in its own way, and Lorenz felt himself relaxing in increments as he completed the familiar motions of rubbing her down, caring for his tack, and mixing her feed. He was so immersed in his thoughts of war that when Judith draped her arms over the stall door, Lorenz startled and almost fell backwards. </p><p>Judith let out a bawdy laugh as Lorenz placed a hand over his racing heart. "Judith, forgive me," he said, shaking his head. "I was unprepared to receive visitors." </p><p>"Fear not, Gloucester," she said, snorting with laughter. "I don't expect you to stand on ceremony in a stable." </p><p>Lorenz floundered, then nodded, placing the heavy feed bucket on the ground. "Quite right," he said. "My apologies." They stared at each other for a moment, nonplussed. Judith’s words from the last time they’d met—<i>’I don't trust a Gloucester as far as I can throw him’</i>—rattled uncomfortably around Lorenz’s mind. </p><p>"So you and your father had a falling out," she said, shifting against the door, and raising an eyebrow at him. "I take it you didn’t agree with his plan to assassinate my cousin?" </p><p>Lorenz’s breath escaped him in a rush at the way she spoke of it so casually, like it had no consequence. "That was one of several points upon which we disagreed," Lorenz said firmly. "I have committed my heart and soul fully to Claude as leader of the Alliance, despite my father’s earlier misguided attempts to disrupt his rule." </p><p>"His <i>traitorous</i>  attempts to disrupt Claude’s rule," Judith said sharply. Lorenz inclined his head, even as his stomach twisted in on itself at the implication of his own guilt. </p><p>"The traitorous actions of the family head hardly indicate that the whole household is complicit," he said politely. "I, my siblings, and my stepmother look forward to supporting the Archduke to the fullest of our abilities." </p><p>Judith’s expression was unreadable. "It can’t be easy, going against your father," she said at last. "My congratulations, Lorenz. I hope it doesn’t blow forth an ill wind for you." She slapped the stable door and left, leaving Lorenz feeling quite unsteady and unsure whether she’d just given him her version of approval.</p><p>Aplani whickered, nudging him in the side. </p><p>"Yes, well," he muttered, picking up the feed bucket again. "<i>You</i>  try redeeming yourself to your friend’s stern, older cousin after spending half your night in bad dreams."</p><p> </p><p>—</p><p> </p><p>Dinner was a lively affair, more akin to supping with his siblings than with his peers. Lorenz winced as Lysithea’s voice rose above the din of the dining hall, squabbling with Hilda about the proper ratio of sweet to savoury in their meal. </p><p>"Make some room for your leader, huh?" Claude suggested as he insinuated himself beside Lorenz, forcing him to shift closer to Leonie as Claude settled in beside him. "Is there any bread left?"</p><p>"I believe we have seen the last of it for tonight," Lorenz said, gesturing towards the empty basket on the table.</p><p>Claude sighed. "I suppose this is what I get for working late." </p><p>Lorenz, chewing steadily, shook his head. "One of us would have brought you something," he said, covering his mouth with a hand. "You need not subject yourself to this chaos." A bread roll flew past Lorenz’s ear, but Claude caught it with a wink. </p><p>"Nice catch!" Caspar yelled from across the table. Lorenz groaned, massaging his temples. "Can you do that with arrows too?" </p><p>"Come to the training yard tomorrow and find out," Claude said, swiftly buttering the roll. His body was warm beside Lorenz’s, whose bones shivered delicately at his proximity. "But let’s leave our esteemed friend Lorenz to eat in peace." </p><p>"Hold on a minute!" Caspar said, practically bouncing in his seat. "I wanna know about the engagement!" </p><p>"I beg your pardon?" Lorenz asked, casting his mind back over the numerous battles he'd been a part of in the past five years.</p><p>Caspar laughed. "<i>Your</i>  engagement, obviously! When's the big day? You must be excited!" </p><p>It would be wrong to say an awkward silence fell, because there was far too much noise and mayhem occurring for there to be anything like silence, but Lorenz froze, and several others fell quiet around him. </p><p>Lorenz purposefully cleared his throat. “I broke it off, several months ago,” Lorenz said, acutely aware of how Claude had stopped buttering his roll. </p><p>Claude’s knife scraped softly as he resumed his buttering. “You're disappointing people left and right," he said in a low voice, underneath Caspar’s shouted apologies. </p><p>Lorenz's face warmed, shocked by Claude's audacity. not only to taunt him over his refusal, but to do so in front of everyone. "I—"</p><p>"Still, you’re a little young to leave a widow behind, right?” </p><p>Lorenz’s fork fell to his plate. “I—I’m sorry, what?” </p><p>Claude used the distraction of the clatter of Lorenz's fork to steal a sausage from Caspar’s plate. “Well, this is war, you know? You can pray to the Goddess all you like, but sometimes it's not enough."</p><p>Lorenz felt cold. The same words he’d echoed to his father a year earlier, thrust back at him. He’d escaped the war of nobility, but the Church’s war had caught up to him at last. “Indeed.” Lorenz pushed his plate away. “That’s war, isn’t it? Well, I’m off to bed. I shall see you all in the morning.” </p><p>Claude half rose from the bench as Lorenz stood. “Wait, Lorenz—” </p><p>Caspar’s voice rose above Claude’s calls, promising vengeance over his stolen sausage and hampering Claude in his attempt to follow Lorenz. </p><p>Lorenz left the dining hall in a black mood, feeling wretchedly alone despite the bustling room he'd left behind. Going back to his rooms would do no good, not if he wanted to escape his thoughts; the quiet would only make things worse, however, all of Garreg Mach seemed quiet and still these days. Lorenz stalked in the direction of the cathedral, carried by instinct more than anything else; it may be quiet, but at least it was somewhere he'd been able to find solace in the past. </p><p>His anger at Claude only multiplied as he made his way there. As if any of them had chosen this war, this foolishness. As if Lorenz had chosen to wed, to leave behind a grieving widow and family.</p><p>He crossed the bridge, and walked under the broken portcullis to enter the ruined cathedral. The sight of it sobered him slightly, and he sank into the rearmost pew with a heavy sigh. He'd been sitting there for some minutes when he heard footsteps, and turned to see Lysithea enter by the same door, pretending she wasn't panting. </p><p>"Lorenz!" she called when she spotted him. "What did you run off for?"</p><p>"Lysithea," Lorenz said wearily. "I am sorry, but perhaps—"</p><p>"We still have to finish our talk from earlier," she said firmly.</p><p>Lorenz bit his cheek. He turned and looked up at the dull light oozing through the stained glass windows, their colours dulled by the drizzle outside. "Perhaps we could continue tomorrow. I mean no slight, but...I should very much like to be alone just now.” </p><p>Lysithea hesitated. "How about I stay," she murmured, moving closer. "But we don't have to talk if you don't want to."</p><p>Lorenz briefly closed his eyes before gesturing to a pew. "I should be grateful for your company. Please, sit?” </p><p>"Thank you," she said, making her way over and taking a seat beside him. "Anything to stop you from brooding like a—a—"</p><p>"Like a what?"</p><p>"A <i>gargoyle</i>," she said decisively. </p><p>Lorenz raised his eyebrows, drawn into the conversation despite the frothing sorrow and rage that continued to bubble in his breast. "And what gave you the idea that I was planning on brooding?"</p><p>Lysithea huffed. “You stormed off on a rainy night into the shadows of a derelict cathedral. What else were you going to do?” </p><p>“Fair enough,” Lorenz said, inclining his head. He sat beside her, twisting his fingers together at her expectant look. With another sigh, he begrudgingly offered, “You heard about the cessation of my engagement, at dinner. I merely wanted to contemplate the…necessities of war.” </p><p>Lysithea nodded. “So there’s…nothing in store for you, after this?” </p><p>Lorenz’s mouth twisted. “Absolutely nothing,” he said, a touch bitterly. “You know that as well as I, if I recall correctly.”</p><p>“I know," she agreed. Her affirmation felt small. They sat in silence for a moment before she spoke up again. “Linhardt and I have been looking into it,” she said, smoothing a crease in her dress. “We think that there’s more to it. He has a whole theory about crest activation and deactivation without removal, like the way it first manifests when you’re young—” </p><p>“Lysithea, please,” Lorenz hissed, alarmed, and glanced over his shoulders. “Anyone could be listening.” </p><p>She scowled. “You can’t give up,” she said fiercely. “Just so you know. There’s more to be done here, and we're going to need you.” </p><p>“I know,” Lorenz sighed, suddenly struck with a wave of weariness. “I know, Lysithea.”</p><p>Several rousing promises and muttered rebellious curses later, Lysithea left him alone in the cathedral, where he sat for a very long time, consumed by his thoughts.</p><p> </p><p>—</p><p> </p><p>Everyone soon settled into the new, yet familiar rhythm of life at Garreg Mach. Each day drew new supporters to their cause, many of them people who'd been forced out of the monastery at the start of the war. Lorenz worked closely with Catherine to manage the Knights of Seiros, and to get their military forces back up to scratch. </p><p>Claude was in his element, and though Lorenz saw shades of the boy he'd known as house leader, Claude's leadership truly began to shine with Professor Byleth at his side, patiently watching and advising. </p><p>Lorenz tried not to feel envious. However, it was impossible not to notice how the coldness that had once again sprung up between him and Claude persisted. Knowing that he was the cause of it, Lorenz fought against his jealous feelings, and forced himself to be cheerful with everyone, Claude and the Professor included. Only in his most private moments did he allow himself to feel his frustration and mourn the loss of a friendship that had just begun to bloom. </p><p>It was a balmy evening, several months after their return to the monastery, and Lorenz had been down to the town to meet with several traders, in the hopes of arranging to have more herbs and other medical supplies brought in. He was just entering by the main gate to the monastery when a voice nearby called out.</p><p>"That's him! Count Gloucester, it was him you wanted, wasn't it?"</p><p>Lorenz cast about for the source of the voice, and found a group of unarmoured soldiers standing in a group nearby. He paused, drawing on a polite smile. "Can I help with something?"</p><p>There were about six of them gathered, and at his words, they exchanged glances, before one shouldered the rest aside. A woman, quite tall, with a sturdy frame, and a murderous look on her face. </p><p>"That's the snake?" she hissed to one of her companions.</p><p>Lorenz started, his eyes widening. He almost glanced around to see if she could possibly mean anyone else, but her eyes were fixed on him. "I—I'm sorry, have we met?"</p><p>The other soldiers exchanged looks again. "Here, Maurer," one said, and an arm reached out to pull her back. "Just leave it."</p><p>"Leave it my arse," she growled, and shaking off her companion, she marched toward Lorenz. "You," she said, jabbing a finger at him. "You're the Count's son, are you?"</p><p>Lorenz hesitated, and though he felt the urge to step back, he forced himself to stand his ground. "I am Lorenz Hellman Gloucester," he said, attempting to infuse his voice with some of his usual confidence. His voice only sounded weak and thready to his own ears. </p><p>The woman's fury deepened, and she came faster, and was upon him almost before he realised. The angle of her body hid the swing of her fist until it was too late for him to dodge, and her fist slammed into his jaw with punishing force. It made a sound like a spilled bucket of water hitting the paving stones, and Lorenz staggered back under the force of it, uttering a low cry of pain in his surprise. </p><p>"What the—who the hell do you think you are?" he demanded, straightening up again.</p><p>She scowled at him, then put her head back, and spat at his feet. "You and your bastard father turned my brother into a traitor! They hanged him last month in Derdriu."</p><p>Lorenz paled. "Maurer," he whispered, remembering the name. One of the men who'd betrayed them when they rode out to meet Edelgard a year earlier. </p><p>"Aye," she said, and then she spat again, this time into his face. "Fucking traitors."</p><p>Struggling to keep his face calm, Lorenz reached up and wiped her saliva off his cheek with his sleeve. "My father was the traitor," he said in a trembling voice. "And your brother was no better."</p><p>"He did what he was ordered, no more!" she cried, her face twisted with rage. "He was a good man!" Some of the other soldiers had crowded around them, and a few jeered at this point, clearly in support of their friend, if not prepared to openly attack a member of the nobility themselves. </p><p>Lorenz grimaced inwardly; he could defend himself against one or two of them, but not all six, unarmed. Not even with the power of two crests on his side. </p><p>He shook his head as they continued to jeer. "Your brother committed <i>treason</i>," he spat. "He conspired to kill the Archduke. If he was such a good man, why didn't he report my father's treason to the council?"</p><p>"And be stabbed in the back?" she hissed. "You're just like him, just like your father. The nobility are nothing but a band of cowardly, self-interested <i>pricks</i>."</p><p>With that, she threw herself at him again. Lorenz braced himself this time, yet she still managed to get in a solid hit before he was able to block her, setting his ears ringing with the force of the blow to his cheek. He raised his hands to fend her off, but when he tried to step away, one of the soldiers surrounding them stuck out a foot and tripped him. Lorenz stumbled, and then Maurer was upon him, bearing him to the ground with a few furious kicks that winded him severely, then using her weight to pin him down and batter his face with her fists. </p><p>It couldn't have lasted long, less than a minute, although it felt endless to Lorenz in his attempts to fend off her blows. He distinctly felt a few stray kicks  as she sat on top of his chest, and concluded that her companions must have decided to join the fracas. </p><p>"Enough!" a voice suddenly roared, cutting across the jeering and stamping from the soldiers who had gathered to watch the fight. Maurer was seized and hauled off him, and Lorenz warily moved his hands away from his face. </p><p>Claude stood over him, dressed only in a shirt and trousers, and wearing an absolutely <i>furious</i>  expression. Lorenz's heart sank, his stomach turning horribly; of all the people to have witnessed him in such a state. "Lorenz," Claude said, the impatience in his tone making it clear it wasn't the first time he'd said it. "Can you get up?"</p><p>Blinking, Lorenz realised Claude was holding a hand out to him, and he clasped it firmly. </p><p>"Good lad," Claude said, and pulled firmly, hauling him to his feet. </p><p>Lorenz wavered as he stood, suddenly dizzy, but Claude was there to catch him, keeping hold of Lorenz's arm and drawing it up around his shoulders. </p><p>"All of you," he said, gesturing to the crowd of soldiers, including the two guards who were each holding one of Maurer's arms. "Follow us up to the keep, and by the Goddess if I hear a single word out of any of you—"</p><p>"Claude," Lorenz said weakly, and broke off coughing. "Please, the fault was mine—"</p><p>Claude hissed through his teeth. "My order extends to you too, Gloucester. Keep your damn mouth shut for once, I beg you."</p><p>Lorenz obeyed him, falling silent, and the whole party made their way slowly up the steps to the main entrance hall. Here, Claude arranged for the group of soldiers to be imprisoned until he could establish the truth of the matter. When he'd taken care of that, he turned his attention back to Lorenz, who was resting against the wall.</p><p>"Shall I have someone bring a stretcher?" he asked. "We should get you to Manuela."</p><p>"Please, Claude, I don't need the infirmary," Lorenz said weakly.</p><p>Claude folded his arms. "You can barely walk."</p><p>Lorenz squinted up at him; one of his eyes was already swelling shut. "I don't need a healer."</p><p>Claude held his gaze for a moment, then he nodded once and helped Lorenz to stand again, and they made their way up to the room Claude had taken upstairs. Hilda and Professor Byleth had both insisted that he take one of the old faculty rooms, and Claude had reluctantly agreed when Lorenz pointed out that it was far safer and more defensible than the dormitories, and that they could scarcely afford another assassination attempt after the last one came so close. It proved a boon on this occasion also, as this hall was much less frequented, so the only person they encountered on their route was Cyril, who had apparently armed himself with a mop bucket for want of other employment, and who greeted them with a silent, wary nod. </p><p>"You don't think—would Cyril say anything?" Lorenz asked in a hoarse whisper as Claude shut the door behind them.</p><p>"Nah," Claude said. He carefully set Lorenz down on the edge of the bed, then busied himself with collecting various items from around his room: his washbowl, a clean cloth, a lantern. "Cyril's got a good head on his shoulders, and he's anything but a gossip."</p><p>Lorenz nodded. "If only all Almyrans were as sensible as that one."</p><p>Claude didn't respond, instead busying himself with rolling up his sleeves and lighting the lantern, which he placed on a small table beside the bed. After soaking the cloth in the bowl of water, he moved closer, standing over Lorenz and taking hold of his chin. The touch of his fingers was like the gentle heat of a candle under Lorenz's skin. He turned Lorenz's face toward the light, his expression grave as he examined the damage.</p><p>Unnerved by his careful attention, Lorenz licked his bottom lip, intending to break the silence, but nothing came. His stomach was like a knotted rope in his chest, and finding that he couldn't bear the weight of Claude's gaze on him, he lowered his eyes. </p><p>Claude clicked his tongue softly, but said nothing at first. He merely took up the cloth and began to dab away the dried mud and blood from Lorenz's face. His lip had split from one of the punches, and when Claude pressed the cloth against it gently, Lorenz let out a hiss. Claude was still for a moment, then he cleared his throat. “Never thought I’d see the day when I had to patch up Lorenz Hellman Gloucester from his involvement in a back-alley brawl.” His voice was dry as he rinsed and wrung out the cloth. </p><p>Loren swallowed. "I wouldn't call it a brawl."</p><p>“You can say that again," Claude said with a snort. "From what I saw, it was you curling up like a sick dog and letting them beat you bloody."</p><p>Lorenz’s eyes burned. “Her brother was one of the traitors executed for my father’s treason,” he muttered. “She had cause.” </p><p>Claude snorted. “Cause to beat you like a rug? I don’t think so.” </p><p>“Claude—” Lorenz’s voice cracked. </p><p>"I don't understand you," Claude said, smacking the cloth down on the table and turning on his heel. He began to pace, his brow furrowed. "I didn't want to have those men killed anymore than you did, but they tried to <i>kill me</i>, Lorenz. I couldn't very well just let them go."</p><p>Lorenz swallowed with difficulty. "And my father?"</p><p>Claude ceased his pacing. "...What are you asking me, Lorenz?"</p><p>"He's the one that gave the order, yet he sits safe in prison while his scapegoats hang."</p><p>"I asked you once before what fate you would choose for him."</p><p>"And what would <i>you</i> choose?" Lorenz spat, his emotions besting him, heat rising in his throat. </p><p>Claude's mouth thinned, but he didn't reply. After a moment, he came over to the bed and knelt before Lorenz. "We don't have to talk of it tonight," he murmured. "You need to rest."</p><p>Lorenz scowled at him. "I can't keep putting it off."</p><p>"Shh," Claude hushed gently, placing his hand over Lorenz's gloved fingers. With the other he reached up, touching Lorenz's injured cheek. As Lorenz watched, Claude bit his lip, running his gaze over Lorenz's face, then he caught his eyes with intent. "Do you want me to try?"</p><p>Lorenz looked down at him, eyes wide and startled.</p><p>Holding his gaze, Claude reached up and cupped Lorenz's face between his bare hands. "I'm not sure if I'll be able to…" He trailed off, closing his eyes, and Lorenz did the same. </p><p>Claude's hands on his face felt warm, but not much warmer than was normal, and Lorenz waited for a minute or two with nothing happening before he spoke up. "You—" he whispered haltingly. "You have to—feel for the edges."</p><p>Claude huffed. "I'm trying," he murmured, but he didn't move his hands away, and after a moment Lorenz gasped at the sudden burst of heat and light against his skin. Warmth spread over him, like the sensation of slipping into a hot bath, and then a soothing coolness that dulled the sting of his injuries. </p><p>"That's it," he whispered, sighing as the pain diminished. </p><p>Claude huffed out a weak laugh, then he suddenly pulled his hands away. </p><p>Lorenz blinked his eyes open, pleased to find that his swelling eye was already less severe. "Thank you."</p><p>Claude held his gaze, looking up at him with his expression soft and open, a faint weariness at the corners of his eyes. One of his hands rested on Lorenz's thigh, transferring his warmth, and a faint, distant hum of something <i>more</i>.</p><p>Lorenz swallowed. The air felt suddenly charged, like the sky before a thunderstorm. As he watched, Claude's gaze darted down to his lap, his folded hands, then back up to his face. Lorenz's lips parted, and he saw Claude frown slightly, preparing to draw back. Wordlessly, his heart beating like a drum in his chest, Lorenz raised his hands and, one by one, he drew off his gloves. </p><p>Claude's gaze followed as Lorenz set the gloves aside, then darted back to his face. "Lorenz..." he murmured, his voice wary.</p><p>Pushing aside his hesitation, Lorenz cupped Claude's face between his hands.</p><p>"Lorenz," Claude said again. He didn't pull away, but Lorenz could feel the tension in his body, as if he might bolt at any moment.</p><p>"Please," Lorenz whispered, his eyes burning again. "I know I have no right to ask, but—"</p><p>Claude's jaw tightened, his mouth pulling into a fine line, and Lorenz's heart crumpled like a letter tossed into a fire. "You don't want this," Claude said softly, but his voice lilted up slightly, an interrogative, and he raised one eyebrow a fraction.</p><p>Lorenz exhaled shakily. "Oh, Saints," he whispered, his eyes burning again. "Claude—you have no <i>idea</i>  how much I want this." </p><p>Claude stared back at him, eyes widening briefly, but then his face was a blur, and they were kissing, heat tearing through Lorenz as he opened his mouth and parted Claude's chapped lips with his tongue, heedless of the stinging of his own split lip. He slid his hands into Claude's hair, and then Claude was scrambling into his lap, and they were kissing again, open-mouthed and panting against one another's lips.</p><p>"Claude," Lorenz gasped when he had a moment to draw breath. "Oh, Goddess—please, don't stop—" </p><p>Claude didn’t answer, only moved his lips to Lorenz’s neck, and Lorenz keened as he bit at the soft skin there. He didn't even care to remind Claude not to leave any visible marks, too lost in the sparking sensations of Claude's bare hands against his skin, of the way his lips felt, velvet and perfect. Before he had command of his senses, Claude's mouth was on his again, and Lorenz instinctively grasped a handful of Claude's shirt, bunching it up at the small of his back. Claude’s hips rolling against his sparked fire across Lorenz’s nerves, and he thrust up with a groan, enjoying the warm weight of Claude's thighs as he sat astride him.</p><p>Claude gave a groan, and his next kiss was messy, teeth gnawing at Lorenz's bottom lip. Fisting his shirt more tightly, Lorenz slid his other hand up to cup the back of Claude's head, then seized a handful of his soft, thick hair in surprise when Claude started to suck on his tongue. Claude broke away from him, cursing, but as Lorenz fumbled for an apology, Claude tugged his shirt over his head and flung it away, leaving his hair charmingly disordered. His eyes were on Lorenz, dark and heavy with want, and Lorenz found himself spreading his hands against the flat planes of Claude’s bare chest, dragging his fingers down in slow, sparking lines of heat as Claude groaned.</p><p>Lorenz began to lose track of time as their mouths met again and again, and his lips started to feel hot and swollen. His cock <i>ached</i>, but he could think of little more than the hot, demanding pressure of Claude's mouth, or the way his skin seemed to hum beneath Lorenz's fingers. At some point Claude fumbled at his shirt, tugging it out of his trousers and nearly tearing it in his hurry to get it off him. When he'd accomplished his goal, the two of them scrambled more fully onto the bed, and Claude pressed their naked chests together with a sigh. They kissed urgently, plastered together, their hands roaming over each other's bodies as they gasped and sighed against one another with abandon.</p><p>"I want—" Lorenz began, grasping a handful of Claude's hair again. "I—need you, all of you…" Feeling bold, Lorenz reached down between them and cupped the bulge in Claude’s trousers, tasting his moan of approval. He hastily delved inside, getting a hand around Claude’s cock, and moaned softly when sparks of heat lit his nerves. </p><p>Claude’s hand slammed into the wall behind Lorenz. "Lorenz—<i>f-fuck</i>—"</p><p>"Take them off," Lorenz urged, finding that he had scarcely any leverage to move his hand in the tight confines of Claude's fastened trousers. </p><p>Claude nodded eagerly, and the two of them squirmed out of the remainder of their clothing, any trace of shyness gone as they kicked off boots and trousers, tossing them aside without ceremony. As soon as they had liberated themselves, Claude pulled Lorenz down on top of him and the two began to move against one another, kissing in a near frenzy. Claude's hands were in his hair, and then he slid one down the length of Lorenz's spine and grabbed a shameless handful of Lorenz's backside.</p><p>"A-ah—!" Lorenz gasped, exhaling hot breath into the hollow of Claude's throat. "Oh, Claude—"</p><p>Claude used his grip to grind their hips together harder, thrusting up against Lorenz's stomach and loosing a delicious groan against his ear. "I thought, nn—you didn't want—" Claude gasped.</p><p>Lorenz shook his head, unable to respond. He didn't have the words to tell Claude how he'd longed for him, how he'd craved his touch. He pressed his mouth to Claude's again instead, kissing him clumsily. </p><p>"Lorenz, can I—"</p><p>Whatever Claude wanted to say, he didn't finish it in words. He rolled them over so that they were on their sides again, then he began to move his way down, kissing Lorenz's neck, then his chest. When he reached Lorenz's cock, he wrapped his fingers around it loosely, giving a low whistle, before lowering his head and lapping at it softly. </p><p>Lorenz gave a low cry, hips jumping. "Claude, oh Saints—" His thighs trembled beneath Claude's hands as he struggled to keep himself still. Claude's full lips pressed against the tip of his cock, lingering in an approximation of a kiss. When he parted his lips slowly, Lorenz couldn't tell whether he were teasing or simply taking his time, and he reached out instinctively to touch Claude's head, fingers threading through his thick hair. He'd fantasised about something like this happening for so long, it seemed impossible that it was real, and though he opened his mouth to speak again, he daren't voice his thoughts for risk of shattering the illusion.</p><p>As he let his eyes roam over Claude's neat, lithe form, Lorenz's gaze halted at the sight of Claude's cock sitting heavy and hard against his stomach. It was dark and flushed, curved slightly toward his navel, and Lorenz's mouth watered at the thought of reciprocating Claude's attentions. Impatient, he pulled Claude away from him with the hand in his hair, briefly registering Claude's wide-eyed surprise before he was moving them, turning on the bed so that he could wrap his arm around Claude's thigh and swallow the length of his cock without ceremony.</p><p>Claude gave a low cry, shuddering beneath Lorenz's hands. After a moment he moved his lips against Lorenz's cock again, closing them around the tip, taking it in his mouth with a groan. </p><p>Lorenz whimpered, pulling him closer, letting Claude's cock bump the roof of his mouth. They started to move against one another slowly, hips shifting, each moaning around their mouthful as they pleasured one another together. It wasn't long before Lorenz felt himself tumbling toward completion, but before he could utter a warning, Claude gave a low groan and his cock stiffened and pulsed on Lorenz's tongue, coating the back of his throat with salt. </p><p>Despite his surprise, he swallowed reflexively, however it still prevented him from being in time to warn Claude of his own approaching peak. He spent with a muffled groan, then released Claude's cock with a gasp, muttering apologies. He started to sit up, but Claude was faster. </p><p>Pulling him down against the pillows once more, Claude caught Lorenz's face between his hands and kissed him, letting the taste of their spend mingle. </p><p>"Claude—" Lorenz gasped.</p><p>Claude shook his head. "Don't speak," he whispered. "Just for tonight."</p><p>Lorenz opened his mouth to protest, but Claude kissed him again before he could speak. His bright gaze bored into Lorenz, pleading with him. </p><p>After a moment, Lorenz nodded, then he tucked his face into Claude's shoulder, holding him tightly.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>lorenz...better put a ring on it if you're going to behave so scandalously :O</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. Chapter 9</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>it is very possible this will spill over into 11 chapters so uh. watch this space.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Lorenz woke, for once, well-rested. Opening his eyes, he found himself treated to the sight of Claude still sleeping beside him, and his heart fluttered as he allowed himself a few stolen moments to appreciate it. Catching Claude sleeping was a rare event; he had always kept unsociable hours, and gave off the impression that he mostly subsisted without sleep. His face was gentle in repose, free of the usual strain of his office. The delicate ink stroke of his eyelashes sat in contrast against the faint freckles across his cheeks, and his pert nose was buried in his pillow. His lips looked soft and inviting, and Lorenz blushed at the remembrance of them on his skin. </p><p>He let his eyes drop lower, taking in the haphazard sprawl of Claude's limbs, the way their legs were comfortably entwined, the tempting curve of the sheets over Claude's backside. By the time he dragged his gaze back up to Claude's face, Claude had opened his eyes.</p><p>"Mornin'," he mumbled, not seeming to mind the way Lorenz was ogling him. </p><p>Lorenz cleared his throat softly. "Good morning."</p><p>Claude closed his eyes again and hummed softly. "Time?"</p><p>"I do not know," Lorenz began to say, but before the words were out, the cathedral bell began to toll in the distance. They lay in a tense silence, counting the strokes. When the tolling ended at seven strokes, both relaxed. </p><p>"Not so bad," Claude murmured.</p><p>Lorenz hummed his agreement.</p><p>After a minute, Claude opened one eye. "I can hear you thinking."</p><p>"I don't doubt it," Lorenz replied without heat. He reached out, touching Claude's shoulder gently, then smoothing the flat of his hand across Claude's back. "I hope—" he began, then paused, unsure what he wanted to say. Less sure even of what he <i>should</i>  say. He stroked Claude's skin idly with his thumb.</p><p>"You hope…?" Claude prompted softly.</p><p>Lorenz shook his head, smiling. "That was something I've never tried before, you know."</p><p>Claude laughed, low and delicious. "Nor I," he said, and shifted closer, pressing more of his lovely naked warmth against Lorenz. "In truth, I've never found the time for it."</p><p>"Time for...that particular act?" Lorenz asked, momentarily lost.</p><p>Claude blinked at him. "For any of it."</p><p>Startled, Lorenz pulled his hand away and left it floating awkwardly in the air. "You don't mean to say that you'd <i>never</i>...?"</p><p>"What, had you?" Claude asked, smirking. Then, seeing Lorenz's guilty expression, his own eyes widened, smile slipping. "Oh." He recovered quickly. "Well, that shouldn't surprise me. You're handsome, charming—"</p><p>"As are you," Lorenz interjected, mortification sending heat to his face. "And besides, it was nothing of consequence. Dalliances with other soldiers, nothing to—" He broke off, pinching his lips together, realising he'd been about to suggest that nobody he'd ever been intimate with compared to Claude. It was true in every sense, and therefore he couldn't possibly admit it. </p><p>Claude laughed again, breaking the tension. "For heaven's sake, Lorenz, it's perfectly natural. No need to blush like a maiden, particularly not when you've just confessed to me sucking another man's cock before."</p><p>"I do not blush out of <i>shame</i>," Lorenz shot back, "and if you want my advice, Claude von Riegan, you will remember in future not to comment on the blushes of people you've just bedded, or wish to bed. It is most unseemly."</p><p>"Consider me duly warned," Claude murmured in a teasing tone that made a different kind of heat roll down Lorenz's spine. </p><p>Before he could become engrossed, Lorenz turned onto his back and looked up at the ceiling. "I ought to go," he said in a low voice. "I suppose it wouldn't do for anyone to see me coming out of your rooms at this hour."</p><p>"I suppose not," Claude agreed. </p><p>After a moment, Lorenz pushed himself up, and began to look around for his clothes. Claude was silent as Lorenz dressed, and Lorenz couldn't help reminding himself that this was the first time Claude had done this. It gave him an odd feeling, a sickly mix of pride and self-disgust. There was a reason he'd refused Claude all those months ago at Hartley. Nothing good could come of this, for either of them. With his end encroaching, Lorenz had already begun to regret it, and he could only imagine the suffering he may cause Claude to endure if he allowed them to become attached. </p><p>He was grateful when Claude said nothing further as he readied himself, and when he stood to leave, Claude only smiled, and bid him adieu until breakfast. </p><p> </p><p>—</p><p> </p><p>Matters between them proceeded in this civil manner over the ensuing days and weeks. Claude did not attempt to press any kind of suit, or even carnal interest, and Lorenz silently gave thanks for this unexpected clemency. However, as the war dragged on, his guilt deepened, knowing that he ought to tell Claude about his limited lifespan. But every time he tried, each time they were alone together, his courage failed him, and they talked only of troop movements, supply lines, or the occasional idle topic over a game of chess. </p><p>In this way, the weeks rolled by quickly as they fought to keep ahead of Edelgard's plans. Until one afternoon, only days after their bitter victory at Gronder Field, Claude came to find him at the training grounds. He had a letter folded in his hand, and it was clear from the tightness of his jaw and the set of his shoulders that he was unhappy about something. He and Lorenz retreated to a private corner where they wouldn't be overheard.</p><p>"Has something happened?" Lorenz asked in a low, urgent voice.</p><p>Claude frowned. "In a manner of speaking. I must return to Derdriu shortly, and I hope—though I will not insist—that you accompany me."</p><p>Lorenz's face clouded. "It concerns my father."</p><p>"Yes," Claude said in a sombre tone. "I have delayed his trial too long, we can't put it off any longer."</p><p>"I understand."</p><p>Claude cleared his throat. "There's one other thing. It seems your father has finally given up some information which I have been able in some part to verify."</p><p>Lorenz's heart beat faster. "What kind of information?"</p><p>"Regarding his...associates," Claude murmured. He paused and glanced around, assuring himself that they were not overheard. "All this time, I have felt that <i>something</i>  was not right. The figures have never quite added up."</p><p>"What—what do you mean?" Lorenz asked, trying in vain to keep his countenance. </p><p>"Little things, mainly," Claude sighed, waving a dismissive hand. "But, if I'm right, it's not just the Alliance they've been interfering with. All that business at Garreg Mach before the war began. Remire, and the missing students—" He paused, frowning. "The ones who were experimented on, like you."</p><p>Unbidden, Lorenz gave a soft gasp. "Of course. It's all connected." He covered his mouth with a shaking hand. "Then—what happened in Remire all those years ago—great Saints, it seems I had a fortunate escape after all."</p><p>Claude's face darkened. "Comparatively, perhaps."</p><p>"And...what now?" Lorenz whispered. "Has he given you enough to act?"</p><p>"No," Claude sighed, shaking his head. "Whatever information he had I believe is somewhat outdated. These shadowy operatives must have realised they could be compromised by our removing such a public conspirator, and shifted their operations elsewhere."</p><p>"He may just be lying."</p><p>Claude flashed him a humourless smile. "An outcome I have certainly explored, I assure you." He shook his head. "I'm convinced he's told us what little he knows in more or less a truthful manner. His co-conspirators are just a lot sneakier than he is."</p><p>Lorenz fell silent. He felt dizzied by the possibilities Claude had opened up. The idea that his torturers could be acting across all of Fódlan, that Edelgard might be involved in their machinations, or vice versa, was wretched to consider. Finally, he cleared his throat. "When will my father's trial be held?"</p><p>Claude's brow softened briefly, his eyes warm with sympathy. "In a week."</p><p>"Then we must leave for Derdriu soon."</p><p>Claude nodded. "I leave it up to you." After a moment's hesitation, he gripped Lorenz's arm and squeezed it tightly. "If you decide to go, you shall not be alone."</p><p>"No," Lorenz said, exhaling heavily. "Because you shall be his judge and executioner."</p><p>Claude's mouth tightened, but he did not reply. After a moment he bowed, and retreated to leave Lorenz to his solitude.</p><p> </p><p>—</p><p> </p><p>The ride to Derdriu was one of the more taxing of Lorenz’s life. Evading wayward patrols from the Empire’s soldiers, hiding off-road from wyvern riders that gave no indication whether they were friend or foe, not to mention braving the elements, saw Lorenz’s tracking and hunting knowledge expand ferociously over the time it took them to reach Derdriu for his father’s trial. </p><p>He suffered each tribulation with a knot of tense nerves in his stomach, uncomfortably aware that he was traveling on a journey whose culmination was likely his father’s death. Though he’d never had any particular fondness for the man, it was still discomfiting to know that his actions had brought it to pass. </p><p>Each time his thoughts swerved toward the maudlin, Lorenz firmly reminded himself that this man had voluntarily had him altered in order to further Gloucester’s name, no matter the cost. </p><p>It helped only some of the time, and it was with a black mood that Lorenz settled into the Gloucester townhouse in Derdriu. Bereft of staff since his father’s arrest, the whole house felt shadowed, shrouded sheets to protect the furniture from dust and home to a nest of animals in the attic.</p><p><i>At least things with Claude had improved</i>, Lorenz thought, as he set a pot of tea to boil. Their interactions had warmed—not unlike the weather—the further from Garreg Mach they’d ridden. Lorenz only wished it didn’t come at so high a price.</p><p>With a sigh, he began to remove the dust covers from the furniture, idly speculating on where he could find a housekeeper for the duration of his stay.</p><p> </p><p>—</p><p> </p><p>"Well," Lorenz said, when he approached Claude on the steps of the council chamber. "Don’t you look a sight in all that finery." </p><p>Claude chuckled, which set his clothing jingling. "Aren’t you always the one who tells me I must dress with my station in mind?" His attire, fairly dripping in official medals and ribbons that marked him as the leader of the Alliance and the heir to House Riegan, shone ostentatiously in the early morning sun. </p><p>Lorenz nodded, and said coolly, "Fitting, I suppose, when handing down a death sentence to one of noble blood." </p><p>Claude’s gaze sharpened. "He hasn't been sentenced yet, Lorenz." </p><p>Lorenz just shook his head, feeling slightly ill. It was foolish to have brought it up at all; Claude had little choice in the face of treason. It was only a miracle that Lorenz's father had escaped judgement this long. Wordlessly, Claude ushered them inside, and they made their way to the courtroom where the fate of Lorenz’s flesh and blood was to be decided.</p><p>Only nobles had been permitted to attend, which naturally meant that the whole of the council sat arrayed in the front rows, with minor nobility filling the rest. Lorenz saw a wealth of familiar faces; everyone, it seemed, wanted to judge for themselves which way the wind would blow under Claude's leadership. It was, after all, decades since another member of the nobility had been tried in such a manner. Anything could happen in the course of war. </p><p>As the doors to the hall opened to admit the prisoner, Lorenz summoned every ounce of his focus to remain upright instead of slouching and hiding as he wished to do. </p><p>His father’s hair had grown long in his imprisonment, though someone had clearly granted him the use of a comb for the trial. His mouth still held the hard, angry cast that Lorenz knew well, and his eyes glittered with malice. Unlike the last time Lorenz had laid eyes upon him, however, he was utterly silent. </p><p>His father’s gaze roamed around the gallery, and when he saw Lorenz, he sneered. Drawing a deep breath, Lorenz met his father’s gaze with a steely one of his own, gratified when the Count was ordered to face the front bench once more.</p><p>The trial was such in name only. Claude relayed the charges and evidence that had been laid against the Count, and when he was asked to offer a defence, he merely spat and replied haughtily that he would do anything to keep a usurper from the head of the council. </p><p>Claude looked grave, and Lorenz held his breath as he waited for him to pass sentence. </p><p>"Your treasonous acts have been numerous," Claude said solemnly, "and you have attempted to involve more than one noble family of Leicester in your disgrace. You have shown contempt for this court, and for the council you claim to protect." He shook his head. "But whatever I may be, I am not inclined to send someone so clearly incapacitated to the noose."</p><p>A murmur went around the chamber at his words. Lorenz's already disordered stomach twisted horribly. </p><p>"It is clear that your mind has become disturbed," Claude continued with a sigh. "And I cannot send a man to his death, knowing his behaviour may be the result of such disordered thinking. You will be exiled, and will serve for five years in the quarries in Morfis."</p><p>Lorenz rose from his seat, grabbing hold of the bench in front of him with shaking hands. Talk was already erupting around him, but Lorenz couldn't make out a word of it. He couldn't tear his gaze from Claude, the posturing magnanimity turning his stomach. As he stood frozen, the Count was led away in his chains, and Claude nodded at the gathered nobles before turning and striding from the room. </p><p>Almost as soon, Lorenz made his own escape, flinging open the doors to the court scribe’s study as the noise in the chamber behind him grew. Two young men with apprentice’s trim on their surcoats stared up at him as he entered, shaking, his vision narrowing.</p><p>"Out!" he snapped, pointing towards the door with a trembling hand. </p><p>The apprentices fled, leaving Lorenz alone, Claude’s final judgment ringing in his ears. He sank into a chair and slumped against the table. What a <i>fool</i>  he had been, to think that there would only ever be one outcome. Trust Claude, of all people, to wriggle out of it and make Lorenz feel like an imbecile. </p><p>The apprentices had fled through another door which led into a hallway, leaving it half open in their hurry to retreat. A knock on the doorframe had Lorenz’s eyes snapping open. </p><p>"Lorenz? Are you in there?" </p><p>"As if you don’t know," Lorenz said, poorly contained ire causing his voice to tremble. "As if you don’t know—<i>everything</i>—as you <i>always</i> do."</p><p>The click of the door closing was the only indication that Claude had entered the room. "Come now, Lorenz," he said, his tone unusually grave. "We rid the Alliance of a threat." </p><p>"Exiling my father at the last moment before what should have been a death sentence?" Lorenz snapped. He turned, rounding on Claude and shoving a finger in his chest. "You used Gloucester for a—a <i>power play</i>." </p><p>Claude’s brow creased. "It had to be done, Lorenz. The people favour a leader who shows mercy—"</p><p>"Mercy!" Lorenz scoffed. "I knew it, you planned the whole thing like a—a <i>play</i>, and yet you didn't see fit to inform even me."</p><p>"I didn't plan it, Lorenz," Claude murmured, moving closer to him. "I...had a number of options I was considering. It became clear that I couldn't risk losing what little favour I've garnered amongst the Leicester nobility. Nobody likes a traitor, but the only thing they like less is a tyrant."</p><p>Lorenz clenched his jaw. He could see the sense of Claude's words, of course. It had been difficult for him to win favour on the council, and it was all the more important that he hold onto what he could when they were in the midst of fighting a war. "I merely...I wish you had been honest with me," he whispered.</p><p>"And what should I have said," Claude replied, his voice gentle but cold, "if I had told you I might spare him, only to turn around and have him hanged?"</p><p>"A fate he deserved," Lorenz said, shaking his head. "And yet he has been turned into a chess piece for the Alliance." </p><p>Claude sat silently next to him as Lorenz quivered with the force of holding back his emotions. He knew that in a clearer frame of mind he would recognize the necessity of such a move; how they could not set aside their personal lives for a moment if they were to succeed; how so few men survived three years of hard labor in the sandstone quarries of Morfis, where his father—neither a hale nor hearty man—had been sentenced to five. But for now, he resisted the urge to be overcome with the tide of indignancy, rage, and sorrow that flooded him in the wake of Claude’s newfound authority, and gathered himself with a shuddering breath.</p><p>"Still," Lorenz sighed. "I suppose it's no more than he attempted to do with me and my siblings." </p><p>Claude, perhaps wisely, said nothing in response to that. After a moment, however, he spoke again. "Your father," he said, before pausing. "He’s to be transferred to the prison ship at the docks. Would you like to see him?" The unspoken <i>for the last time?</i>  hung in the air. </p><p>Lorenz closed his eyes, grasping Claude’s shoulder tightly. "I believe I would," he said, once he had gathered himself. "Please, take me to him." </p><p> </p><p>—</p><p> </p><p>They met the disgraced Count Gloucester in the courtyard reserved for the carriages of prisoners, a closed-off space that held the same foreboding air as the old study his father used to favor. Lorenz held his head high. He'd worried he might become upset, but instead he found himself dry-eyed and numb as he stood before the man who had shaped his entire life. His hopes, his dreams, his principles, all had been founded on the lessons taught to him by this man. </p><p>The Count attempted to cross his arms but was stopped short by the manacles on his wrists, earning a wary glance from the guards. Claude stood warily behind Lorenz, barely far enough away to be proper. </p><p>"So." His father’s voice was gravelly with disuse. "Take a long look, boy. This is what happens when you stand up for what is right."</p><p>Lorenz raised his chin. "What is right for <i>you</i>  is not necessarily what is right for Gloucester," he said coolly. "Let alone the rest of Leicester."</p><p>"You've lost what little passion you had, boy," the Count spat. "You're blind to the truth."</p><p>"What truth?" Lorenz shot back. "The one that you created for yourself, as you pictured Gloucester as the head of the Alliance, standing against all evil?"</p><p>His father’s lip curled. "I wouldn’t expect you to understand, even now. What a waste of a crest." He spat at Lorenz’s feet. </p><p>"I think you've miscounted." Claude’s voice was silky as he stepped up beside Lorenz. "Wouldn’t that be <i>two</i> crests?"</p><p>The Count's eyes widened, and he looked from Lorenz to Claude and back again. "You <i>told him</i>?" he hissed, spitting with fury. He stared at Lorenz for a few moments, his eyes bright with rage, and then it was clear that understanding dawned, and he threw back his head and laughed. "So, this is to be my legacy!" he cried, his voice ragged at the edges, his face twisted with crazed malice. "Perhaps you have passion for something after all."</p><p>Lorenz gritted his teeth, clenching his fingers into fists at his sides. </p><p>"My son," the Count continued in a sarcastic voice, looking between Lorenz and Claude with disgust, "bending over for the enemy because he doesn't have the strength to lead by himself."</p><p>His words plunged like a dagger into Lorenz's breast, but before he could compose himself well enough to respond, Claude spoke.</p><p>"I think that's enough out of you," he said in a mild tone, under which Lorenz could sense his barely-contained fury. Claude nodded to the guards, who seized the Count by his arms and hustled him away. </p><p>Lorenz flinched as the door to the cart slammed shut, cutting short his father’s outraged shrieks. He had some small regret that he’d been denied his father’s blessing, in the end. </p><p>As the cart began to proceed away from them, Claude moved closer to him and reached out to touch his elbow. "You’re not a waste," he said softly. "No matter what he said." </p><p>"I am not sure what to believe," Lorenz said shakily. He moved away, into a sheltered alleyway, scarcely noticing that Claude followed. "My father was correct though, was he not? I <i>have</i> lost my passion—my purpose, even. I've put aside the one goddess-cursed thing that I was bred to do."</p><p>"And you think that means you can't forge a new purpose for yourself?" Claude growled. "That you haven't done so?"</p><p>Lorenz raised his eyes to Claude's miserably. "What purpose?" he murmured. "To die in a meaningless war?"</p><p>"You're not going to die, Lorenz," Claude said, anger creeping into his voice. </p><p>Lorenz laughed weakly. "At this rate, even my exiled father shall outlive me. And what have I to show for it?"</p><p>Claude glanced around, then he pressed Lorenz back against the stone wall with a hand on his shoulder. "You have the Alliance," he said in a harsh whisper. "It persists because you helped bring down a traitor."</p><p>"Claude—"</p><p>"And what about your siblings? They will live free, happy lives because of you."</p><p>Lorenz hung his head.</p><p>"And," Claude continued more softly, "you have me." He reached for Lorenz's hand, and pressed it against his chest, over the place where he'd been wounded all those months ago. "I'd be dead if not for you."</p><p>Lorenz's chest hitched with a stifled sob. "How—how can you say—" </p><p>"Lorenz," Claude said. He lifted Lorenz's chin with a finger. </p><p>Lorenz wasn’t sure if he was the first to lean in or not, but as their lips brushed, he found himself half-wishing that his sole purpose in life was simply to kiss and be kissed by Claude von Riegan. It was not the time for it, and certainly not the place, and yet Lorenz found himself clinging to Claude's clothing, panting desperately against his mouth as they exchanged a heated, desperate kiss, sparks flying between them wherever they touched. </p><p>His father's words rushed back to him suddenly, and Lorenz broke the kiss, a sick ache filling his chest. </p><p>Claude licked his lips unconsciously. "Is something wrong?"</p><p>Lorenz shook his head, words catching in his throat. "Forgive me, Claude—you will not think me rude, I hope, if I beg a few moments alone."</p><p>"No," Claude said, giving his arm a comforting squeeze. "I'll have someone fetch your horse." He paused before turning away. "I have some things to do here in any case, but if it wouldn't be unwelcome, I could look in on you in a couple of hours."</p><p>"Afraid of what I might do?" Lorenz asked weakly. </p><p>Claude shook his head. "Just concerned for a friend."</p><p>Lorenz nodded. "You're always welcome, Claude."</p><p>"Very well. I shall see you this afternoon." He gave Lorenz a small smile. "Make sure you eat something, won't you? You've gotten thin eating nothing but rations."</p><p>"I shall try."</p><p> </p><p>—</p><p> </p><p>It was evening by the time Claude came to call for him at the townhouse. On Claude's orders, Lorenz had eaten a very small meal at lunchtime, leaving most of it, but had arranged a more hearty dinner in anticipation of his company. </p><p>By some uncanny ability, Claude arrived just at precisely the right time for food to be served, although his laughter when Lorenz communicated this was subdued. </p><p>"I hope you are not in low spirits too," Lorenz observed as they sat down to dine. </p><p>Claude gave him an odd look. "Should you prefer me to be cavalier and cheerful?"</p><p>Lorenz huffed. "No, I suppose not."</p><p>"Are you still cross with me?"</p><p>Lorenz shook his head. "No. Ultimately, you did what was best for the Alliance."</p><p>"That doesn't mean you can't be cross with me," Claude said, raising an eyebrow at him.</p><p>"Are you so keen to have me angry?" Lorenz asked, laughing a little. "Be quiet, will you? Eat your dinner."</p><p>Claude smiled. "That's better. The world feels set to rights when you're telling me off."</p><p>They ate for a while in a companionable silence, but Lorenz found that he couldn't turn his thoughts from the day's events, and it was clear that Claude noticed his distraction.</p><p>"What is it?" he murmured, as they retired to the parlour after their meal. At Lorenz's startled look, he frowned and continued, "Something's troubling you."</p><p>With a sigh, Lorenz pressed his mouth into a thin line, considering his words for a moment before he spoke. "I can't help but wonder," he murmured, "whether he was truly a good man once."</p><p>Claude said nothing, but he leaned closer, his face open and willing.</p><p>Lorenz cleared his throat. "It's just...I learned my principles from him, and—aside perhaps from some adjustment to my view of the differences between common and noble blood—I do not think them wrong, even now."</p><p>"Your principles are noble ones, Lorenz," Claude said, and smiled faintly. "No pun intended."</p><p>"Thank you," Lorenz murmured, and sighed, shaking his head. "But that means he and I started out at the same place."</p><p>Claude frowned. "You are not your father."</p><p>"No," Lorenz said, unconvinced. "But I cannot help but wonder what led him astray."</p><p>"You think something changed him," Claude offered, his face calm, revealing nothing. </p><p>"Perhaps," Lorenz muttered, frowning. "Perhaps it was the influence of these...shadowy operatives you mentioned. Perhaps simple disillusionment."</p><p>Claude raised an eyebrow. "I dread to think the kind of disillusionment that could lead to one willingly submitting one's own children for torture."</p><p>The reference to Lorenz's second crest, reminding him of the death sentence over his head, turned his stomach, and he glanced away with a wince. "Please, let's not discuss it."</p><p>"Very well," Claude agreed. </p><p>"I think I could do with a strong drink," Lorenz sighed, pushing himself to his feet. He crossed to his father's liquor cabinet, and retrieved an unopened bottle of whisky his father had laid by some years earlier for a special occasion. "It may not be special, but I'd say that today certainly counts as an <i>occasion</i>," he remarked as he opened the bottle. </p><p>"I have to agree," Claude said, nodding his thanks as Lorenz passed him a generous glass. </p><p>As Lorenz poured his own glass, he noticed Claude looking around the room, and smiled at the sight. Claude had visited once or twice while Lorenz was still spending most of his time in Derdriu at the beginning of the war, but they had not been on such close terms then, not to mention that Lorenz would have been loathe to risk the Count's ire by inviting Claude there often. </p><p>With some difficulty, Lorenz forced down thoughts of his father, and went to join Claude on the settee once more, sitting just out of reach. For a while they simply sipped their whisky, and talked softly of nothing in particular. Lorenz shared news of his siblings, and they talked with affection of friends they'd left behind at the monastery. On the surface, it was a pleasant way to spend an evening, and yet Lorenz could hardly sit still for the simmering tension in the air between them. </p><p>He rose eventually to collect the whisky bottle, but before he could begin pouring, he heard Claude get up, the whisper of his footsteps on the carpet. The buzzing under Lorenz's skin renewed as Claude approached.  </p><p>"I'm glad," Claude said very softly, "that you're not angry with me."</p><p>Lorenz set down the bottle. His hands were trembling. </p><p>Claude reached out and placed a hand on his hip, using the other to brush Lorenz's long hair aside, while he leaned in slowly and pressed a kiss against the back of his neck. </p><p>"Claude," Lorenz gasped, gripping the edge of the table.</p><p>"Do you want me to stop?" Claude whispered, his breath stirring the fine hairs on Lorenz's nape. "Or are we going to do something we shouldn't?"</p><p>Lorenz shuddered. He turned on the spot and reached for Claude, cupping his face and tipping his face up to kiss him. All the urgency of their earlier kiss rushed back, Claude reaching up to put his arms around Lorenz's neck as he deepened the kiss. Claude's mouth was hot velvet beneath his own, his tongue soft yet demanding. His hands slid into Lorenz's hair, gentle fingers skimming through the long strands, then gripping gently, tugging his head this way and that to ease the kiss along. </p><p>"Claude," Lorenz gasped, as their fervent kisses began to slow after a couple of minutes. He tugged at a handful of Claude's shirt. "Please—I want you."</p><p>"Yes," Claude sighed, curling his fingers around the back of Lorenz's neck and pressing their foreheads together. "Oh yes."</p><p>Lorenz put his hands on Claude's waist, nuzzling against his cheek before seeking out another kiss. He couldn't help remembering their last encounter, several months earlier, and Claude's guileless confession that it had been his first time. He wondered if Claude had been intimate with anyone since; it seemed unlikely, given how hard he worked, and how little he slept. </p><p>"Let's go upstairs," Lorenz whispered, drawing back a little way. </p><p>Claude gazed back at him, his eyes very wide, and very dark in the firelight. He nodded, and Lorenz took one of his hands, and led him out of the room, and up the staircase. A fire had been lit in the master bedroom, where Lorenz had taken to sleeping when he visited. He'd removed the Count's more ostentatious furnishings, and replaced them with items more to his own taste, but the room still felt cold and overly spacious. </p><p>Not so with Claude in it. He brought the space to life, with his mischievous smile as he helped Lorenz out of his shirt, and the way his skin glowed in the firelight. Lorenz pushed him down onto the bed and stripped him unceremoniously of his clothes, before climbing on top of him. A tiny part of him was loosened by the whisky, but in the main he simply craved Claude's mouth, the heat of his skin, the bulk of his body beneath Lorenz's own. Letting his hands roam, Lorenz kissed him again eagerly, driving his tongue into Claude's mouth, tasting the lingering alcohol on the roof of his mouth. They were both down to their smallclothes, and Lorenz could feel Claude's cock, hot and solid against his thigh. He wanted more. </p><p>When Claude broke the kiss with a faint, muffled sound of protest, Lorenz slipped away, trailing his mouth and hands down the length of Claude's body, moving down to kneel beside the bed. </p><p>"Lorenz—wait a minute—"</p><p>"Please," he groaned, working Claude's cock out of his smallclothes with clumsy fingers. "Let me, please…"</p><p>Claude gave a soft moan, hips jerking into Lorenz's touch briefly, before he sighed and pushed himself up on his elbows. "I was...sort of hoping we could, uh." He paused, wrinkling his nose. </p><p>It was hard to tell in the dim light, but Lorenz realised that Claude was blushing. “I'm listening, Claude," he murmured in a teasing tone. "Though I suggest haste," he continued, nuzzling at the warm weight of Claude’s balls in his hands. "I will not be thwarted much longer."</p><p>“Gods,” Claude laughed softly. “I can’t—<i>think</i>—when you’re doing that, ah—!" Collecting himself, he reached for Lorenz's hands, giving him an insistent tug. "Just—slow down a moment," he murmured. "There's no need to rush." </p><p>Lorenz drew himself up, a good-natured retort flying to his lips, but Claude placed a finger upon them in a shushing gesture. "Lay with me," Claude said firmly, moving his hand around to cup Lorenz's cheek. "I’d...like to try that, with you."</p><p>Lorenz's heart thundered in his chest. "Do you mean—" he began, and flushed, smiling when a flicker of understanding passed between them. "Alright."</p><p>"You'll show me what to do?" Claude asked, drawing him back up onto the bed and kissing him. </p><p>Lorenz laughed softly. "And I suppose you've never read a book on the subject."</p><p>Claude's answering grin was wonderful. "Several," he answered, as he rolled them over to sit astride Lorenz's thighs. "But they," he continued, lifting one of Lorenz's hands and entwining their fingers, "are primarily concerned with the anatomical, and—ah." He smiled. "Very little of it seems relevant when you and I touch."</p><p>“Oh, I’m not quite sure about all of <em>that</em>,” Lorenz said, raising his hand to kiss the back of Claude’s. “We both have anatomy, do we not?” He let his teeth graze the soft skin of Claude’s wrist, indulging in the satisfaction that washed through him as Claude’s eyes went half-lidded and hazy with pleasure. </p><p>"I could argue, but I won't," Claude said, chuckling. He ducked his head for a kiss, still laughing, and Lorenz found himself smiling as he rolled his hips up, taking care not to dislodge Claude from his lap. </p><p>"Gods," Claude said weakly, resting his forehead against Lorenz's. "How does anyone ever get to the main event when just this feels so good?" </p><p>"I think that's a side effect of <i>us</i>  being the ones engaged in the act," Lorenz suggested with a smirk. "We have aces in our respective sleeves—ah!" He yelped when Claude pinched his thigh in retaliation, tapering off into a gasping moan as Claude drew his fingers up the sleek column of his ribs. "E-excellent start," Lorenz said, trying to keep his voice steady, but it wavered as Claude rocked his hips. "Now kiss me, would you?"</p><p>Claude shushed him with a finger. "I don't need a lesson on how best to warm up a lover.” </p><p>Lorenz snorted. “Correct me if I'm wrong, but I believe you just asked for one.” </p><p>Claude’s answering smile was devilish. “I don’t need one to warm <em>you</em>  up.” He kissed Lorenz once more, trailing his lips down the column of Lorenz’s neck while Lorenz tried in vain not to cry out. "But I'd, ah—appreciate some direction with the...more <i>complex</i>  aspects."</p><p>Lorenz laughed softly. “I don't think you'll find it <i>too</i>  terribly complex, my dear." Lorenz fit his hands between them and tweaked Claude’s nipples, grinning back at Claude just as deviously when Claude groaned into the soft space behind Lorenz’s ear, his thighs attempting to squeeze shut. "I recommend starting with the oil in the drawer beside the bed."</p><p>Claude’s hand shot out and slid the drawer open, fumbling for the small bottle before pressing it into Lorenz’s hand. “May I do the honours?” he asked against Lorenz’s mouth.</p><p>Lorenz shivered at the thought of Claude’s clever fingers inside him, curling and rubbing against the places he could never quite reach on his own. He cupped Claude’s cheek and nodded, sliding his hand into Claude’s hair and tugging. “Best get my smalls off, first.” </p><p>Claude undressed him without ceremony. The hum of his hands on Lorenz's bare skin was ever present now that they were naked together again, yet no less potent, and Lorenz shuddered and bit back a low moan when Claude's hands skimmed back up the length of his legs, before cupping his cock in one hand and his balls in the other. </p><p>"Saints," Lorenz groaned, head tipping back against the pillow as he arched his hips into Claude's gentle touch. "W-what were you saying about—not making it to the main event?"</p><p>Laughing, Claude gave him an encouraging squeeze before releasing him. "You're right, sorry."</p><p>Lorenz couldn't help but drag him down for a kiss or five once more. When they could finally bear to part, it took him only a few whispered commands to get Claude between his legs, stroking softly over his hole. Lorenz was trembling, his body threatening to quake apart. </p><p>"Start slow," Lorenz said in a low voice, encouraged by the rapturous look in Claude's eye.</p><p>Claude said nothing, only shifted his gaze upwards to Lorenz's face as he eased the first of his fingers inside. Lorenz squeezed his eyes shut as he grasped at the bedcovers in an attempt to ground himself. The golden buzz that resonated from their bodies' contact was inside him, sending lightning up his spine to pool in his belly, and he was almost overcome by it. </p><p>"Very good," he gasped. It took him a moment to recover his faculties, but when he opened his eyes again—unaware that he'd closed them—he saw Claude watching him carefully. Only the rapid movement of his muscular chest gave him away; quick, light breaths that made no sound sent shivers across Lorenz's bare stomach. </p><p>"Please tell me I can put another in soon," Claude said, his voice soft, but with alarmingly urgent intent. </p><p>Lorenz nodded, spreading his legs wider and stroking a hand through Claude's hair. "Please, darling." </p><p>With a groan, Claude rested his head on Lorenz's knee and slipped another finger inside him, stretching Lorenz out carefully as Lorenz murmured instructions between gasps. </p><p>It didn't take much time for Claude to get bold, swallowing the head of Lorenz's cock as he curled and rubbed his fingers inside Lorenz's body. Lorenz writhed, his sweaty back sticking uncomfortably to the sheets as he frantically searched for a delicate way to warn Claude of his impending release.</p><p>"C-Claude—please—I'm <i>close</i>—" </p><p>Claude glanced up, his pert, clever mouth full of Lorenz's cock, and teased a third finger at the rim of Lorenz's hole. With a wail, Lorenz reached his peak, his body tightening into a bow as he spent in Claude's mouth. </p><p>"Oh Goddess," he gasped, shivering uncontrollably. "Claude, please." The warm suction around his cock eased, and Claude's fingers went still. Lorenz peered through his lashes to find Claude sitting back on his haunches, looking incredibly smug. </p><p>"Don't get cheeky," Lorenz said, his voice raw but fond. "You've hardly mastered the bedroom arts <i>yet</i>." </p><p>"But I have mastered <em>you</em>." Claude grinned triumphantly, coating his cock in oil as Lorenz made use of a discreet handkerchief in the bedside drawer. </p><p>"I am so happy that you think so." Lorenz cast aside the handkerchief and surged upwards, replacing Claude's hand with his. "Please. Let me." </p><p>Claude made a gruff, content sound, one that Lorenz kissed from his lips. "You've done this often?" Claude murmured, sighing against his mouth as Lorenz stroked him firmly.</p><p>Lorenz shook his head. "No, not often." He lay back again, and nudged Claude's backside with one of his heels, urging him closer. "Are you ready?"</p><p>Nodding, Claude reached down between them, and Lorenz's breath caught at the sensation of Claude's slippery cock nudging up against him. </p><p>"Do it, please—" he gasped, clutching at Claude's shoulders. </p><p>Claude moved against him slowly, pushing inside inch by inch. Lorenz couldn't take his eyes from Claude's face, watching the tension in his expression, the pleasure suppressed in his bitten lip, the colour blooming over his cheekbones. When they were fully joined, Claude paused, holding himself very still. </p><p>"Are you alright?" Lorenz asked him, only a little smug.</p><p>"I—" Claude began, eyes widening as he met Lorenz's gaze. He closed his mouth again, shaking his head slightly.</p><p>Lorenz laughed. "Have I finally found a way to render you speechless?"</p><p>Claude's mouth tilted slightly, warming his stunned face. "Has anyone ever told you how beautiful you are?"</p><p>Startled, Lorenz's soft laughter caught in his throat. "N-no more than you are."</p><p>Claude grinned. "Is it a competition, then?" He leaned down, nuzzling Lorenz's cheek with his lips. "Gods, I feel like I've been set aflame."</p><p>"It's alright," Lorenz soothed, cupping a hand around the back of Claude's neck. "But, don't keep me waiting <i>too</i>  long, will you?"</p><p>"What did I say about rushing?" Claude chided gently. He cleared his throat. "Though, I confess I'm a little nervous to make a fool of myself."</p><p>"Oh," Lorenz sighed, pulling him closer, and pressing a kiss to his temple. He reached down with his other hand, cupping Claude's lovely backside and steering him gently. "Just pull out a little, then back in—" He groaned softly as Claude obeyed, filling him with a shimmering warmth. "That's it. Don't be shy, dear heart, you'll soon catch the rhythm of it." </p><p>Claude began to move against him, keeping his head down, his movements slow but determined. </p><p>"Perfect," Lorenz cooed, stroking Claude's hair. "Just listen to your body, it already knows what to do."</p><p>Claude shuddered, then he turned his head and kissed Lorenz clumsily, driving into him at the same time. "Is this—alright? Are you alright?" </p><p>With a groan, Lorenz clutched at him, kissing him back hard. "I'm <i>wonderful</i>," he said, cupping Claude's face in both hands. "Please, don't stop."</p><p>"I'm not sure I'll—last much longer," Claude said with a breathless laugh.</p><p>"That's alright," Lorenz sighed, humming happily as he lay back on the pillow and arched his back into Claude's next thrust. "Saints—don't—don't hold back."</p><p>Claude groaned, dropping his forehead to Lorenz's chest. "F-fuck, Lorenz—I—never expected…"</p><p>He didn't finish the sentence, but he made a soft sound as Lorenz's fingers slid into his hair, stroking through the thick curls. The force of his next thrust jolted Lorenz up the bed, and he planted both feet on the mattress with a self-satisfied moan as he rolled his hips to match Claude's rhythm. Claude huffed out a curse as he accepted the challenge, rocking his hips faster and harder. Lorenz's toes curled as Claude's cock reached deep, and he kept Claude there with a stifled sob of pleasure as Claude chased his release.</p><p>Claude's eyes met Lorenz's when he gazed up, and with a gentle, unsteady sigh, Lorenz brushed a thumb across Claude's cheekbones. With a single moan, Claude turned his cheek into Lorenz's hand and kissed his palm as he spent, hips jerking. </p><p>Lorenz murmured platitudes as Claude pulled himself together, burying his face in Lorenz's neck. His shoulders were shaking with some unexpressed emotion, but he kept it locked tight, unwilling to relax until Lorenz maneuvered him into settling atop him like a particularly heavy quilt.</p><p>"Claude," Lorenz whispered as they settled comfortably, allowing himself to cherish the word on his tongue for once.</p><p>Claude brushed his nose back and forth across Lorenz's collarbones several times before lifting his gaze. "I'm not sure what to say that wouldn't cheapen the moment," he admitted, reaching up to smooth Lorenz's mussed hair back from his face.</p><p>Lorenz's heart grew impossibly softer. "Then say nothing," he whispered back, wrapping his arms more tightly around Claude, allowing himself to enjoy the brief intimacy. </p><p>They lay together for a long time. Lorenz expected to feel tired, but instead Claude's presence, the closeness of him, kept him awake and on edge, restlessness beginning to hum beneath his skin before long. It seemed Claude was in a similar state, and they separated at last, sticky and clumsy, though with surprisingly little awkwardness between them. </p><p>Lorenz rose and crossed the room to fetch a pitcher of water, unconcerned by his nudity, at least until he turned with a full cup of water in hand to find Claude watching him with unabashed interest. "I hope you're enjoying the show," Lorenz said curtly, bringing the cup to his lips to drink.</p><p>"Naturally," Claude said, beaming at him. "May I have some of that? This was thirsty work."</p><p>Rolling his eyes, Lorenz finished the cup, then poured another and took it back to Claude on the bed. He reclined against the pillows as Claude drank, trying not to stare, but failing miserably. Claude looked beautiful in the firelight, his eyes warm, skin almost golden. Lorenz wanted him more than ever. </p><p>"You're staring," Claude murmured as he finished his cup and set it aside.</p><p>Lorenz raised an eyebrow. "Should I not?"</p><p>Claude shook his head. "Don't stop on my account." He grinned. "As long as you don't mind me doing the same."</p><p>On the contrary; the thought of Claude watching him made Lorenz flush with warmth once more, but he kept that to himself for the moment, only treating him to an enigmatic smile in response. </p><p>To his surprise, Claude suddenly snorted, and Lorenz watched as he trembled with suppressed laughter. </p><p>"What on earth is it?"</p><p>"Sorry, sorry," Claude murmured, grinning at him. "It's just that, when you were...teaching me before, you sounded like my brother when he taught me to swim."</p><p>Lorenz huffed. "That," he said in a mock-haughty tone, "was <i>nothing</i>  like swimming."</p><p>Claude flopped onto his back, cackling with laughter. "That's true," he said in a breathless gasp, and turned to grin at Lorenz again. "I enjoyed that a lot more than being thrown in a lake."</p><p>"I should hope so," Lorenz said, indulging him with a smile of his own. </p><p>"I didn't think we were going to do this again," Claude murmured. His tone gave nothing away, yet interest sparked in his dark eyes. </p><p>"Neither did I," Lorenz admitted. "I didn't think it was a good idea."</p><p>"Oh?" Claude moved closer again, sliding a hand over Lorenz's chest, and smiling as Lorenz gasped at the sensation of his touch. "And now?"</p><p>Lorenz cleared his throat, willing himself back under control. "I still don't think it's a good idea." He watched Claude carefully, watched the hint of disappointment in his eyes that he clearly tried to hide. "But," Lorenz continued in a shaky voice. "I don't seem to have the strength to resist you."</p><p>"Nor I you," Claude whispered, leaning closer to kiss him again. He smiled against Lorenz's lips. "You have a way of getting under my skin."</p><p>Lorenz swallowed. "Our crests—"</p><p>"No," Claude interrupted, kissing his jaw softly. "I mean <i>you</i>." He laughed. "You're the most infuriating person I've ever known, and yet…"</p><p>"And yet," Lorenz murmured, guilt churning in his stomach. He had to tell. He <i>had</i>  to. There was more to this than simple heat, and Lorenz knew he couldn't let Claude come to care for him, knowing the fate that awaited him, knowing how near it was drawing. </p><p>Claude's brow creased, his full lips forming an attractive moue. "What is it?"</p><p>Lorenz swallowed thickly. "There's—something I should tell you."</p><p>Claude tilted his head. </p><p>But no sooner had Lorenz opened his mouth to speak than there was a hurry of footsteps on the landing, followed by a swift knock at the door. Cursing softly, Lorenz pushed Claude aside and called for his servant to enter. </p><p>The young man stepped inside, hesitating when he saw that Lorenz and Claude were both in bed. He was well trained, however, and whatever he may have thought, it didn't reach his face. "Forgive me, milord, I didn't mean to intrude—"</p><p>"Never mind that," Lorenz sighed, waving his hand. "What's the matter?"</p><p>"If you please, Sir, a rider just came. I tried to turn her away, but she said it's of utmost urgency that she speak with you and the Archduke."</p><p>Lorenz exchanged a look with Claude, then nodded grimly. "We shall be down presently."</p><p>The two men dressed wordlessly. Lorenz's heart was pounding with anticipation, and with the knowledge of how close he'd finally come to telling Claude the truth.</p><p>A scout awaited them downstairs, still dressed in her riding clothes. "My Lords," she said as they descended the stairs to the kitchen, startling up from her seat. </p><p>"Please," Lorenz said, gesturing for her to sit, and return to the food and drink one of the servants had provided. </p><p>She nodded. "Forgive me for disturbing you. I was dispatched from Garreg Mach three days ago. There was a siege on the monastery—"</p><p>"Saints, is everyone alright?" Lorenz asked urgently. </p><p>Claude put a hand on his arm to calm him, but the rider was already nodding.</p><p>"No losses, my Lord," she said. "The Adrestians retreated in the direction of Fort Merceus."</p><p>Lorenz closed his mouth, and he and Claude exchanged a look once more.</p><p>"I think we'd better head back to Garreg Mach," Claude said, and nodded at the rider. "Thank you for your efforts."</p><p>After a little more questioning, they left the messenger to finish her well-earned meal in peace, and Claude and Lorenz retired back to Lorenz's bedchamber, although the earlier warmth between them was gone with the reminder of the war at their doorstep.</p><p>"We leave tonight?" Lorenz asked, as he closed the door behind them. </p><p>Claude had crossed to the fireplace, and was staring into the embers with a thoughtful look on his face. </p><p>"Claude?" Lorenz prompted.</p><p>"What? Oh, yes." Claude sighed. "I had hoped for at least a day or two's reprieve, but we cannot risk further delay. We must take Merceus before Edelgard has time to bolster her forces there. We've got to catch them on the run."</p><p>Lorenz nodded. "I'll be ready to leave within the hour."</p><p>Claude reached out for him then, grasping his hand tightly. "You wanted to tell me something, before we were interrupted."</p><p>"Ah." Lorenz forced a smile. "I was only going to say that I'd accepted a dinner invitation for both of us tomorrow evening. But I suppose we shall have to cancel after all."</p><p>"So it seems," Claude said, watching him with a calculating look in his eye. After a moment, he smiled too, though it didn't reach his eyes. "I ought to go and prepare for our journey. I'll come back for you soon."</p><p>Lorenz nodded. "Until then."</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>good work boys, we always knew you could do it! let's hope you both survive long enough to finally be honest about your feelings eh?</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0010"><h2>10. Chapter 10</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Please note that this chapter contains <b>major spoilers</b> for the golden deer/verdant wind route of the game (and minor spoilers for some of the others)! </p><p>Also, we've kind of condensed/fudged the last few chapters of the game a little bit for our own purposes, so it's not entirely true to canon. Please forgive us, it's all in the name of claurenz.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Over the next weeks, Claude and Lorenz seldom had time to be in the same room together, unless they were discussing tactics or supplies. They'd scarcely returned to Garreg Mach before they made their advance on Fort Merceus. By some fortune, they arrived before Edelgard's reinforcements. Either that, or she'd set all her hopes on defending Enbarr. </p><p>"She's getting desperate," Claude murmured, as he and Lorenz lay tangled in Claude's bedroll one evening, discussing strategy in low voices while the heat cooled from their skin. </p><p>Lorenz nodded. "The ease with which we took the Fort—" He paused, wincing as he thought of the soldiers they'd lost, albeit a small number. "I should not say <i>ease</i>, but—"</p><p>"No, I agree," Claude murmured, his expression grim. "The Adrestians didn't put up much of a fight. Though, considering that foul magic that almost destroyed us, perhaps they felt they didn't need to."</p><p>"Don't remind me," Lorenz said with a shudder. He'd felt weak and off-kilter since that javelin of light had destroyed the fort, the sick feeling only dissipating when Claude pulled him into his tent much later that evening. </p><p>Claude clicked his tongue. "I know you don't want to think about it, but after what happened out there today, I don't think we have a choice."</p><p>Sitting up, Lorenz untangled himself from the comforting warmth of Claude's body, looking off to one side. "You think it was them."</p><p>"Don't you?" Claude whispered behind him, his voice harsh.</p><p>Lorenz closed his eyes. Brief images of dark chambers, spilled blood, the sound of chanting. "Of course I do," he said hoarsely. He turned to Claude, taking in his sombre expression. "But where do you plan to look for them? In the sky? And what of Edelgard? You were <i>just</i>  saying that we need to press this advantage and make our advance on Enbarr as soon as possible—"</p><p>"Lorenz, peace," Claude sighed, holding out his hands as though trying to calm a startled horse. "Please. I'm on your side, remember?"</p><p>Somewhat reluctantly, Lorenz relented, settling down beside Claude once more. "I know. I'm sorry."</p><p>Claude shook his head. "Don't be. We're all feeling the strain."</p><p>"And yet you always seem so cool under pressure," Lorenz teased gently, tipping Claude's face toward him and kissing him softly. "I should go."</p><p>"I hope you find some rest," Claude said, nodding as Lorenz rose and began to dress. "The next few days will be long ones."</p><p>Lorenz bid him farewell with his own instruction for Claude to rest, then stepped out of his tent. He'd barely gone three steps before he was intercepted. </p><p>"Lorenz."</p><p>He froze. "Lysithea." He turned to find her watching him, and his eyes darted briefly back in the direction of Claude's tent, wondering how long she'd been listening. "Good evening to you. Is everything alr—"</p><p>"We need to talk," she said, and turned to walk away from the camp. She didn't look behind her, clearly expecting Lorenz to follow, which he did with a mounting sense of dread. </p><p>Lorenz had deflected most of Lysithea's attempts to discuss matters relating to their crests over the past few months, leaving she and Linhardt to continue their research without his input. He'd taken pains not to learn too much about their progress, not wanting to get his hopes up for a cure that wouldn't come. </p><p>"You've been keeping something from us," she said, as they strode past the line of tents to the quiet clearing beyond. </p><p>They were behind their own lines, with little risk of being spotted by Adrestian scouts, but Lorenz felt jumpy and unsettled nonetheless. "What do you mean?" he asked, thinking uncomfortably of the heat of Claude's body beneath his own. </p><p>Lysithea turned and gave him a flat look. "You and Claude," she said. </p><p>Lorenz swallowed. "Lysithea, please—"</p><p>"I heard a curious rumour," she continued, watching him carefully. </p><p>"Is that so?"</p><p>"Mm. Some of the soldiers were talking, apparently one of them served Claude in Derdriu."</p><p>Lorenz frowned; this didn't sound exactly like a preamble to revealing his and Claude's illicit affair. Still, he didn't want to risk giving anything away. "And?" he asked, trying to sound impatient rather than anxious.</p><p>"A few years ago, you and Claude were ambushed. Supposedly you somehow healed him of a mortal blade wound." She raised an eyebrow. "I don't remember you having any particular talent for Faith when we were at the academy. Did you really heal him?"</p><p>"Oh." Lorenz's eyes widened as he realised what she was getting at. Guilt stirred in his gut. "Yes."</p><p>Lysithea stared at him. "Just 'yes'? You and Claude both possess a crest of Riegan, don't you?"</p><p>"Well...yes."</p><p>"And you healed him without any skill in Faith magic. Don't you think that's something you should have told Linhardt and me about?"</p><p>He shifted uncomfortably. "Actually, there's...rather more to it than that."</p><p>After looking around to ensure they wouldn't be overheard, Lorenz reluctantly explained about the strange connection between his and Claude's crests, though he left out the more scandalous elements. </p><p>Lysithea merely stared back at him, disbelieving. "How could you keep this from me?" she hissed once he was finished. "You and I share a crest, do we not? What if—"</p><p>"Believe me, Lysithea, I considered it," he said, shaking his head. "But there's never been any evidence that you and I have that kind of connection."</p><p>"You didn't even <em>try</em>," she spat, her eyes cold with hurt.</p><p>Grimacing, Lorenz reached out his hand to her. "Take my hand." Still scowling at him, she slowly reached out and placed her little hand in his. Nothing happened. No buzzing, no golden sparks, no sensation. Lorenz shook his head. "I'm sorry, Lysithea—"</p><p>"You don't know it doesn't work," she said, snatching her hand away. Reaching into her pocket, she pulled out a little pocketknife. Before he could utter a protest, she slashed it over the back of her hand, making a shallow cut, then thrust her hand at him again. "Heal it," she commanded.</p><p>Lorenz's mouth tightened. "I cannot," he said, gently taking her hand. "Not the way you want me to." He tried anyway, squeezing her hand between his fingers, closing his eyes and searching for the golden threads he felt when he touched an injured Claude. There was nothing. "I'm so sorry—"</p><p>"Then maybe it isn't your crests," she said, snatching her hand away with a sigh. "Maybe it's something else."</p><p>"What else <em>could</em>  it be?" Lorenz asked wearily. "Believe me, Lysithea, I've asked myself the same thing a thousand times. Nothing else makes sense."</p><p>She pondered this for a moment. "Some connection from the Goddess…?" she ventured, but Lorenz waved it away. </p><p>"I hardly think the Goddess has time to worry about two people who—who <em>vibrate</em>  when they touch each other. No, it's far more likely to be a side effect of the improved process they used."</p><p>The colour drained from Lysithea's face, though she attempted to hide it by turning away. "Hmph," she said after a moment. "Maybe. Linhardt and I are going to keep looking, though. Send for us the next time one of you is injured and you want to heal the other." </p><p>Lorenz frowned. "If it’s a grievous wound, Lysithea, I shall heal it before I send for you. Our respective health must always come before research of any kind." </p><p>She stuck out her chin, glowering. "Then pray you’re alive to see the results of it." </p><p>Lorenz reeled back, stung. His voice was thready when he answered, "That was not necessary, Lysithea." She looked down, scowling. "You are a passenger in the same sinking ship as I." </p><p>He watched her toe at the dirt with her shoe for a moment. The rattle and clang of a passing battalion seemed to shake her out of her reverie. </p><p>"Sorry," she said finally. "I didn't mean—" She trailed off with a sigh. "Maybe you and Claude can stop by for a few experiments one afternoon, instead of after a battle." </p><p><em>Goddess smite me if I willingly put Claude in danger once more</em>, Lorenz thought, biting his lip to still the protest that bubbled to his lips, and nodded reluctantly. "I will see to it that we do," he said diplomatically. Perhaps he could explore healing an existing bruise or strained muscle. </p><p>Lysithea nodded, looking wary. "Alright. We—we're going to figure this out, Lorenz."</p><p>He pressed his lips together tightly, swallowing down the emotion that rose in his throat. "For your sake, I hope so," he said softly. "I fear it will come too late for me."</p><p>"Lorenz—"</p><p>"It is alright, Lysithea," he said, forcing a smile. "I know you'll do what you can."</p><p> </p><p>—</p><p> </p><p>They marched on Enbarr two days later, battering through the city's defences and moving on to take the palace. It was with palpable relief that they returned to Garreg Mach with Archbishop Rhea safely in their care, although their party was subdued even after they had arrived. Nobody wanted to think about the old friends and classmates they'd been forced to cut through.</p><p>Claude came to his room, several nights after they'd returned to the monastery, so unsettled that he couldn't sit still for more than ten seconds. Lorenz passed him a cup of tea as he paced the room, but Claude only walked around with it for several minutes without taking a sip.</p><p>"She's still keeping things from us," he said, exasperated. "Rhea. I'm starting to feel sympathy for Edelgard."</p><p>There was no doubt in Lorenz's mind that Claude had already sympathised rather strongly with the erstwhile Emperor of Adrestia, but he kept that thought to himself and cleared his throat carefully. "She and Hubert didn't leave us with nothing. We already have some leads on...them."</p><p>Claude's mouth tightened. "<i>Them</i>."</p><p>"What am I supposed to call them, that ridiculous title—" Lorenz began, but Claude held up a hand for peace and Lorenz fell silent. He hardly wanted to put a name to them in any case; calling them <i>those who slither</i>  just made him think of their dark laboratory, the iron scent of blood. </p><p>"Rhea called them the Agarthans," Claude said, frowning. </p><p>"<i>Lady</i>  Rhea," Lorenz corrected, and immediately felt foolish. </p><p>Claude snorted. "Lady Rhea. Or Seiros. Or whatever we're calling her now."</p><p>"Seiros," Lorenz murmured, mostly to himself, shaking his head. "It's strange to think…" He paused, sighing, unsure of how to encapsulate the notion of having his lifelong faith so challenged in words. He cut his gaze across to Claude instead. "But then, you have never believed in the Goddess, have you?"</p><p>It was the first time he'd challenged Claude's beliefs so directly, and there was surprise on Claude's face for several moments before he collected himself, responding with a shake of his head. </p><p>"I didn't, no," he said easily, not seeming cowed by the prospect of admitting to blasphemy in Lorenz's presence. "Though from what we've seen and heard of late, it's clear she was a real person, whatever else she may have been."</p><p>"Whatever else," Lorenz said, expelling a huff of humourless laughter. "And what do you believe in then?"</p><p>Claude finally stopped pacing, offering him a strange smile before setting down his untouched cup of tea. "Do you really want to know?"</p><p>Lorenz nodded. </p><p>"We don't really have gods or goddesses, where I come from," Claude said softly, turning to look out of the window at the gathering dusk. "No saints either." </p><p>The way Claude spoke was so careful, so considered. It was that, more than his words, that made Lorenz realise he was being brought in on a very closely guarded secret. "...Where you're from?" he asked softly.</p><p>Claude hummed quietly. "Gods—as you'd understand them anyway—they're just...in <i>things</i>. In the river, the trees, they're like—spirits...?"</p><p>As Claude trailed off, he met Lorenz's gaze, and he smiled faintly. </p><p>"Where—" Lorenz began, his voice failing him. He cleared his throat, moving a step closer. His throat was tight, his hands trembling. "Claude, where are you—"</p><p>They were interrupted by a knock at the door. Lorenz broke off with a curse, tearing his gaze away from Claude's dark eyes.</p><p>"What is it?" he snarled.</p><p>The door opened, revealing Linhardt looking rumpled but wide awake. "Good," he said, looking between Lorenz and Claude, seemingly unaware of the tension between them. "I was hoping you'd both be awake."</p><p>"Linhardt," Claude said, with far more warmth than Lorenz was feeling in that moment. "What is it?"</p><p>For answer, Linhardt held up a piece of parchment. </p><p>Lorenz peered at it, but all he could make out were some runic symbols that he didn't recognise. From Claude's frown, he didn't either. </p><p>At their puzzled looks, Linhardt explained. "They were using a particular code, one from a dead language, so it wasn't easy to find."</p><p>Claude's gaze sharpened. "Our slithery friends?" he asked in a low voice. At Linhardt's nod of confirmation, he let out a whistle. "How did you manage to pin them down?"</p><p>Linhardt shrugged. "A bespelled mirror to catch any communication magics. If you use it at sunset, it's quite easy to identify the spell essences, and from there you just collect them and decode them."</p><p>Lorenz nodded, a lump in his throat. Claude settled his hand atop Lorenz's, ignoring the warning look Lorenz gave him. </p><p>"Once we came across several in this language, Lysithea and I dedicated our time to decoding them."</p><p>"So can you find them?" Claude prompted, his voice edged with impatience. "The Agarthans?"</p><p>Linhardt nodded. "I think so. If we can crack the code."</p><p>"I see," Lorenz said softly, his blood running cold. He and Claude exchanged a brief look. </p><p>"We'll find them," Claude said firmly. "And we'll stop them."</p><p> </p><p>—</p><p> </p><p>It took time to find the precise coordinates of the Agarthans' lair and ready their assault, but whatever Claude had been about to tell him before they were interrupted that night, he didn't make a second attempt. He seemed to embody a whirlwind, ricocheting back and forth between preparing tactics and strategy with his generals and shadowing Linhardt and Lysithea like a bothersome ghost, pestering them with endless questions as they concentrated fully on wringing each coded message clean of meaning.</p><p>Lorenz was present to witness the moment when Lysithea’s patience finally broke and she threw Claude out of their tent with the threat of a perilously placed spell. As Claude ducked out the tent flap with an exasperated huff, Lysithea turned towards Lorenz, smoothing down her dress. </p><p>"Honestly," she said, clearly exasperated herself.</p><p>"He's worried," Lorenz offered.</p><p>Lysithea scowled. "We're all <i>worried</i>," she snapped. After a moment she sighed, and passed a hand over her eyes. "I'm sorry, Lorenz."</p><p>He shook his head. "Don't be silly. You've more reason than anyone to feel...frustrated."</p><p>"I’ve been wracking my mind," she admitted, looking over her shoulder. Linhardt seemed to be absorbed in studying a dusty map, but she lowered her voice nonetheless. "I can’t remember anything they might have said. Or, um." She looked down, her hands curling into fists. "Or where they took me, when they…<i>took me</i>. Do you remember at all?"</p><p>Lorenz felt bleak, as if his tongue had turned to ash. His gaze darted to Claude’s shadow, highlighted against the side of the tent by the setting sun, and he wondered whether he should answer at all. "I don’t—" he began, but Lysithea shook her head. </p><p>"<em>Anything</em>," she begged. For the first time, Lorenz saw with clarity how wan she looked, her bloodshot eyes set deeply in her pale face. "Any scrap would help us."</p><p>With a sigh, Lorenz placed his palms over his face, covering his eyes. For the first time, he deliberately forced himself back into those memories. "They didn’t talk much," he said softly, shuffling quickly through fever dreams of pain, sweat, and blood. "I was—drugged, I think, and blindfolded when they took me. It could have been in Brigid, for all I know."</p><p>Lysithea drooped. "Well, it isn’t in Brigid, if Lin is to be believed," she muttered. </p><p>"Cold comfort," Lorenz murmured.</p><p>"Sorry, for making you…" She trailed off, shaking her head. "I had to try." </p><p>Lorenz nodded, briefly clasping her shoulder. He felt, for a moment, as though they were veterans of a hidden war. "I understand. If I recall anything, you will be the first one to know." </p><p>By the time Lorenz left the tent, Claude had disappeared, so Lorenz went alone to collect a meagre dinner and retired to his own tent. They had been travelling for days, searching along the border of the Alliance territories for the source of the coded messages. But despite Claude's optimism, they were no closer to decoding the messages, and powerful spellwork seemed to keep them from their goal as they searched, bringing them to sudden uncharted ravines, or causing flash floods and landslips. </p><p>Despite his anxieties, Lorenz was bone tired from travelling and searching fruitlessly, and he had no sooner eaten than he lay down on his bedroll and fell asleep. </p><p> </p><p>—</p><p> </p><p>Lorenz walked down an endless corridor. The walls and floor were dark stone, and impossibly smooth. His feet made no sound as he walked, and yet there was a sound in the distance, a low growl, so deep and soft he couldn't tell whether it was animal or machine, or whether it was simply a figment of his imagination. He kept walking, but the low, insistent growl began to grow, sending a shudder of trepidation up his spine. </p><p>The corridor ahead of him didn't seem to end; even when he increased his pace, he saw no end, no doorways, only darkness. The growl became louder still, until it was almost a roar, and Lorenz was running, desperately trying to escape it. </p><p>All of a sudden, the darkness swallowed him, and Lorenz cried out as he opened his eyes again to find himself lashed to a bed. Lorenz's eyes widened when he realised where he was: <em>the cold room.</em> </p><p>"Please," he tried to beg, but he was gagged. Tears pooled in his eyes and ran down his temples as he attempted in vain to yank his wrists free, but the manacles - circles of ice around his wrists - held him fast, cutting into the delicate skin. </p><p>The door opened, cutting a triangle of light through the inky darkness, and the tall shadow that was the height of the door stepped through. Lorenz struggled harder: this shadow always brought pain with it. </p><p>Several other shadows followed, and his ears briefly caught the tinkle of machinery as they wheeled in one of their many insect-like machines. Too soon, they surrounded Lorenz, looking down upon him as the tall shadow caught Lorenz’s chin in its hand. </p><p>"You will make history for us today," he said, his voice a sibilant whisper through the frigid air. Lorenz’s head swam; was he speaking Fódlanic, or something else altogether? "The first to be implanted with a major crest. You are strong, and easily endure the machines of Shambhala."</p><p>The words twisted their way through Lorenz’s mind, and as he caught their meaning, he shrieked, rattling his chains. He would not be able to survive another round with those machines, cutting through muscle and tissue and bone with their icy blades and molten needles to rearrange his very being to their liking. A low, desperate moan echoed through the room - Lorenz’s own. </p><p>"Your father seems to think that this will help further his political career," the shadow rasped, beckoning to a shadow with a crooked twist of his finger. Lorenz thrashed against his bonds as the shadow brought out the gag meant to stop him from biting off his tongue. It was adorned with bite marks, his and Goddess knew how many others. It went over his head easily as one of the shadows silently cast a spell for stillness upon him, and he lay quiet, quivering, jaw clenched. </p><p>"Those of us with vision know what your success will mean for our mission," the shadow continued, as chilled fingers worked their way into Lorenz’s mouth and replaced his gag. The shadows and machines formed a familiar shape around him as Lorenz sobbed around the cold strip of leather in his mouth, unable to move as the darkness at the edges of the room started bleeding in.</p><p><em>I was wrong</em>, he thought distantly, as the room began to tilt and swirl around him. <em>The Goddess is not present here.</em> </p><p> </p><p>—</p><p> </p><p>Lorenz woke with a strangled yell, blankets caught between his teeth and tear tracks drying on his cheeks. Spitting them out, he scrabbled frantically for the small book where he recorded his dreams. He did not often record his nightmares, but he stared down at the empty page without thinking and furiously scribbled, <em>Shambhala.</em></p><p>Looking at what he'd written, a frisson of terror shivered down his spine. </p><p>He raced out of his tent and sprinted toward Claude’s, his bare feet slipping in the mud while his nightshirt flapped in the lazy breeze of the cool spring night. There was a lantern burning low in Claude’s tent, despite the late hour, but the soldier standing watch looked vigilant. </p><p>"A message for the Archduke," he panted, smoothing his nightshirt down over his leggings. "It is urgent." </p><p>The guard frowned, opening his mouth to refuse, but with a rustle, Claude poked his head out of the tent flap. "Lorenz?" </p><p>"It’s Shambhala," Lorenz said unsteadily. "That’s where they are." </p><p>Claude’s eyes widened. "Fetch Lysithea von Ordelia and Linhardt von Hevring at once," he said to the guard, who hesitated, unwilling to leave his post. "Now!" Claude snapped, and the guard raced off. Turning back to Lorenz, his voice softened. "I hate to ask this," he said with a grimace, placing a hand on Lorenz’s shoulder. "But…you’re sure? We can’t waste time chasing rainbows."</p><p>"Positive," Lorenz whispered. Claude’s hand drove away some of the lingering chill that suffused his body, even though he was no longer dreaming. "I doubt they would have moved locations. Their machines are unwieldy and not easily cloaked." </p><p>Claude nodded, casting a brief glance around them as he stepped close and wiped a lingering tear from the corner of Lorenz’s eye. Unconcerned for once about keeping up appearances, Lorenz leaned into his touch, and closed his eyes. </p><p>"Come inside," Claude murmured, taking hold of his arm. "You're trembling."</p><p>"It's nothing," Lorenz said, though he didn't have the strength to resist. "A bad dream. We must see the others—"</p><p>Claude parted the tent flap and ushered him inside. "They know where to find us. Sit down before I knock you down, will you?"</p><p>With a sigh, Lorenz crumpled onto Claude's folded bedroll. "You were not asleep?"</p><p>"No," Claude said, shaking his head. "It's hard to find rest when we're so close to our goal." He picked up his folded blanket, shaking it out and kneeling down so that he could draw it around Lorenz's shoulders. </p><p>"This really isn't necessary," Lorenz protested weakly. </p><p>Claude frowned. "So quick to care for others," he said softly, and touched Lorenz's chin with a knuckle. "But when will you let someone care for you?"</p><p>Lorenz met his heavy gaze, his stomach seizing, breath catching in his throat. He suddenly felt that Claude meant far more than the simple offering of a blanket. "Claude—"</p><p>"I'm not proposing marriage, Lorenz," Claude said, his voice very gentle. </p><p>"Please," Lorenz whispered, turning his gaze down. "Please, don't."</p><p>"What are you holding back from me?"</p><p>Lorenz closed his eyes. "Please, Claude."</p><p>With a frustrated sound, Claude moved away from him, pacing across the tent. "Is there anything else?"</p><p>"Anything else?" Lorenz asked, raising his head. </p><p>"Did you remember anything, or just that one word?" Claude asked impatiently.</p><p>Lorenz winced "No, just that. And they have...machines. I know what they are, or how they work."</p><p>Claude ran his hands over his face, sighing. "Alright. You get some rest, I'll discuss it with the others."</p><p>"But—" Lorenz scrambled to his feet. "I couldn't possibly rest now. We have to find them!" </p><p>"And find them we will," Claude insisted, "but you need rest. You've barely slept since we left Garreg Mach."</p><p>Lorenz grimaced. "You could stand to take a little of your own advice," he grumbled.</p><p>"Noted, thank you," Claude said, and gestured to the tent's entrance. "Now go to bed."</p><p>"But I—"</p><p>"Go to bed, Lorenz," Claude said, and finally the hint of a smile returned to his face. "Before I drag you there."</p><p>Lorenz sighed. "Very well. But rouse me as soon as you know anything."</p><p>"Yes, yes," Claude said, already shepherding him to the entrance. "You have my word."</p><p> </p><p>—</p><p> </p><p>Lysithea and Linhardt, provided with a name, had no trouble finally discerning the whereabouts of the Agarthans’ lair. </p><p><em>Hrym</em>, Lorenz thought, looking over Linhardt’s shoulder at a hastily drawn map as Lysithea chattered away. It made strategic and political sense, given their history. </p><p>He met Claude’s eyes, and could tell that their thoughts were the same. </p><p>It did not take the army long to mobilise; in truth, their encampment was only two days' ride from the border of Hrym. As the territory grew more mountainous, the cavalry and infantry drew ahead of the struggling supply wagons, following a twisting, crumbling path through the rugged landscape. </p><p>They met no resistance as they followed the narrow, carved walkway through cliffs that were taller than five men laid end-to-end. Lorenz’s skin crawled with every hairpin turn and switchback their party made, and he broke into a sweat as the trail finally shrunk to a sliver that necessitated them to form a single line in order to move forward. </p><p>Their pilgrimage ended at a large stone arch cut into the side of a mountain, engraved with symbols and runes and lit from the inside with a mysterious blue light. Out of the archway crawled a damp, dark smell, one that had Lorenz dismounting Aplani on weak legs and retching into a small shrub. </p><p>"Alright?" Claude asked from the head of the processional. Lorenz wiped his mouth with a shaky hand and nodded, remounting Aplani and shifting the butt of his lance to rest in his stirrup. He would need the advantage of the reach if they were ambushed, though at the moment, he doubted his arms would cease their shaking for long enough to hold it. </p><p>The dank darkness of the tunnel closed around Lorenz as they paraded through it, enveloping him in a sea of bloody memories that could not be dispersed by the faint glow of the torches. He was not aware that he was visibly shivering until Caspar rode up beside him and grasped his arm, startling Lorenz so badly he almost ran Caspar through before coming to his senses.</p><p>"You alright, friend?" </p><p> </p><p>"Yes," Lorenz said, attempting a gracious tone. "Thank you, Caspar, I merely--ah. The aura from this place is very threatening." </p><p>"You got that right," Caspar whispered emphatically. "Lin says there’s a bunch of magical protections around this place too, and he and Lysithea are having a hard time fighting them off." </p><p>Lorenz craned his neck to look behind him: Lysithea and Linhardt sat upon two horses, led by the cavalrymen who had given up their mounts. Their eyes were closed, and in the glint from the torches, Lorenz could see a sheen of sweat upon Linhardt’s brow. </p><p>"Magical protections, but we’ve met no soldiers?" Lorenz murmured. "That’s odd. From what we know of this place, their inhabitants favour technology, not magic." Lorenz mulled it over as Caspar shrugged. </p><p>"I don’t know, I’m just supposed to go tell Claude about it." He patted Lorenz’s arm. "Try and breathe easy, huh? That armor is heavy, but you make it look like nothin’!" He winked outrageously and began to trot off, but Lorenz gasped, a moment of clarity striking him. </p><p>"Wait! Tell Claude he must also be aware of mechanical traps," he hissed. "They’ll want their creations to do the dirty work, not their soldiers." </p><p>Caspar saluted. "Whatever you say," he said, and vanished into the dark beyond the torchlight. </p><p>The party had no room to spread out beyond two men abreast until the tunnel ended in a cliff that overlooked a vast, sprawling underground city. Lorenz rode up beside Claude just in time to hear his reverent curse. </p><p>"Gods," he breathed. "This was under our feet the whole time." </p><p>Lorenz followed his gaze. The same eerie blue light flickered in the valley below, highlighting the graceful spires of monuments and the curved domes of buildings in a way that still managed to look unsettling. Along the wall, a set of runes illuminated a path down into the city.</p><p>With a sigh, Claude drew an arrow from his quiver. "This is it," he said quietly, just low enough for Lorenz to hear. "I’d make a grand speech and all, but I’m pretty sure we’d bring the whole place down on us if we did." </p><p>“Quite right,” Lorenz said with a faint smile. </p><p>Claude looked sharply at him, then nudged his horse close to Lorenz and wrapped his hand around the back of Lorenz's neck in a warm wash of light. “Stay with me,” he said, his gaze boring into Lorenz’s. Lorenz felt snared by the way his eyes crackled with energy. “We fight better when we’re together.” </p><p>“In more ways than one,” Lorenz said, a half-smile faltering upon his lips. </p><p>Claude squeezed his neck and rested their foreheads together. “You’ve got that right,” he said fiercely. “I know you can do this, Lorenz. Lead us to victory.” </p><p>There was a lump in Lorenz's throat from all the words he wished to say, but he swallowed it, sniffing hard. “Isn’t that your job, fearless leader?” he asked, but Claude was already moving away, hand-signalling his troops to proceed down the path. </p><p>Bracing himself, Lorenz followed. </p><p>Later, he would recall that they were ambushed. In truth, he only remembered flashes of the ensuing battle; streaks of light arcing through the air like lightning from Lysithea, Linhardt, and their battalions of spellcasters casting defensive and offensive spells alike; Caspar, felled by a lance in his side and Leonie heaving him over her shoulders to safety; Claude, shooting through the eye an assassin who approached Lorenz from behind, Lorenz retrieving the poisoned arrow and whirling Aplani in a tight circle in order to stab another who rushed him; Byleth, challenging the universe and its keepers with the brilliant glow of the Sword of the Creator. </p><p>It was only after they had won—they had won, hadn’t they?—that Lorenz staggered against a column, wrapping his hand around the gash that a towering automaton had left in his side. He slid down to the ground with a groan, watching Claude and Byleth through slitted eyes as they walked the battlefield to check for enemy survivors. </p><p>“Gloucester!” The call rang out against the stone walls of the city. </p><p>Lorenz groaned and pried his eyes open, a waspish “<em>What</em>?” flying to his lips. Ignatz stood before him; charred, but no worse for wear. </p><p>“We’re forming scout teams to rout the fleeing Agarthans,” he explained, holding out his hand. “Come on.” </p><p>Heaving a sigh, Lorenz staggered to his feet, mustering his battalion, handing off Aplani to be cared for, and setting off with Ignatz through the murky tunnels of Shambhala. He felt jumpy, as if the battle fever had yet to leave his body, and the glint of light on the hulking figures of the machinery did nothing to calm his nerves. </p><p>They had captured four pockets of Agarthans before their battalions were depleted, shepherding the prisoners back to their main forces and slaying those who fought, before Lorenz realized that the corridor he had just stepped into was a familiar one. </p><p>“No,” he gasped, ignoring Ignatz’s quizzical look. He flattened himself against the stone wall, cold even through his armor, as the door at the end of the dimly lit hallway seemed to grow larger. Somewhere behind him, he could have sworn he heard a growl.  “G-goddess, please, no.” </p><p>Ignatz’s voice sounded very far away when he asked, “Lorenz? Are you alright?” </p><p>“We mustn’t go in there,” Lorenz whispered, backing up. He tripped over one of their scouts and landed, sprawling, across the smooth floor, slimy with muck. The end of the hallway yawned as he fell, his head colliding with the stone floor, and the last thing he heard as he slipped into darkness was Ignatz calling for a healer.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>we really worked hard to get this chapter out on time this week and as ever we cherish your feedback!! </p><p>we are also very sorry for cockteasing those reveals but NEXT TIME WE SWEAR</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0011"><h2>11. Chapter 11</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thank you so much for sticking with us. We humbly apologise for falling off our regular update schedule for 7 months, thank you for being patient with us, and we hope you enjoy the conclusion at long last!!</p>
<p>PLEASE NOTE: this is a DOUBLE UPDATE, so please do not forget to click onto chapter 12 at the end!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The first thing Lorenz saw when he woke was Claude's face leaning over him.</p>
<p>"Claude?" he mumbled, his throat dry and his voice hoarse. "Where—"</p>
<p>"You're safe," Claude told him, smiling. "it's alright."</p>
<p>"Safe," Lorenz repeated softly. The dregs of a dream clung to him, darkness and growling and the cold scent of metal and blood. He sat up quickly, almost crashing into Claude, who luckily had the foresight to move out of the way. "No, it's them, they're here—"</p>
<p>Claude reached for his hands. "Lorenz, peace. Listen to me." </p>
<p>Lorenz turned a wild-eyed look on him, a thousand terrible possibilities briefly flashing behind his eyes before Claude's calmness washed over him. "What happened?"</p>
<p>Claude brought one hand up to touch Lorenz's jaw, turning his face firmly. "You're safe here. The Agarthans are gone."</p>
<p>Lorenz swallowed heavily, letting himself fall into Claude's fierce gaze. "Gone?" he whispered.</p>
<p>"Dead," Claude said, his mouth tight with displeasure. "Those we captured—took their own lives. They're gone."</p>
<p>"Gone," Lorenz said again, dropping his gaze to his hands. Claude still held one tightly, and Lorenz reached up to take hold of the other. "I remember now. I was—there, in that terrible place they kept me. I—I—"</p>
<p>"Shh," Claude shushed gently, bringing Lorenz's hands to his mouth and kissing his knuckles. "I promise, they cannot harm you any longer. I won't let anyone harm you ever again."</p>
<p>Hot, stinging tears spilled down Lorenz's cheeks, and he drew in a sharp breath as a sob wracked him. Claude pulled him closer, and Lorenz flung his arms around the other man's shoulders, burying his face in Claude's neck. </p>
<p>"I'm—so—sorry," Lorenz gasped, clinging to Claude's thin shirt. "P-please—f-forgive me—" </p>
<p>"Forgive you for what?" Claude asked, sounding bewildered. Before Lorenz could answer, Claude looked around, then cleared his throat softly. "Come, let's go and talk somewhere."</p>
<p>Lorenz nodded, reluctantly disentangling himself from Claude and wiping his eyes. </p>
<p>"I'll help Lorenz back to his tent," Claude said to the nearest healer, offering Lorenz his arm to help him stand. </p>
<p>The man gave a nod, dismissing them, and Lorenz went wordlessly as Claude took his arm to lead him away. </p>
<p>They walked down the natural lane that had formed between two rows of tents, sidestepping soldiers sprawled out on crates, hunting dogs gnawing at their dinner, and puddles of unmentionable liquids splattering the walkway into mud. It was noisy and smelly, but full of purpose and life. In that moment, as Claude hailed a battalion leader and listened intently to what she had to say, Lorenz caught the glint of the fading sunlight on Claude’s earring and thanked the Goddess that he had been allowed to live long enough to see it at all. </p>
<p>They walked in silence until they reached Claude's tent, where he paused and drew back the entrance flap. Lorenz stepped inside without protest, too weary to question why they'd ended up here in particular. </p>
<p>"Sleep first, or tea?" Claude prompted.</p>
<p>Lorenz swallowed. "Ah—tea, I think."</p>
<p>Claude gave him a slip of a grin as he turned away. "Good. There's something I want to talk to you about."</p>
<p>"Yes," Lorenz said, his breath leaving him in a rush as he sank into a chair. "I suppose it's time we were honest with each other."</p>
<p>He was too weary for his words to mean anything other than what they were, thinking only of his own secrets. If Claude minded him saying it, he didn't show it. Lorenz sat quietly as Claude prepared tea using his samovar, twisting his hands together in his lap, one knee bouncing as he tapped his heel against the ground.</p>
<p>"Here," Claude murmured at last, placing a hot cup in his anxious hands. "Hold that, and stop looking as if you think I'm about to have you banished."</p>
<p>Lorenz managed a weak smile. "You're much too softhearted for that." He looked down at the cup in his hands, and inhaled curiously, a frown touching his brow. "This is...a flowering brew," he murmured, wrinkling his nose curiously. "From Morfis?" He lifted the cup and inhaled again deeply. "No, Almyra?"</p>
<p>Claude settled into the other chair, their feet just shy of touching. "The breadth of your knowledge when it comes to tea never ceases to amaze me." </p>
<p>They sat for a few minutes in silence, listening to the routine sounds of the camp outside. Lorenz's hands trembled slightly, making his teacup shake; Claude had thoughtfully filled it only halfway however, so the contents didn't spill. When Lorenz had sipped his tea and ceased to tremble quite so violently, Claude refilled his cup without speaking. </p>
<p>Sitting once more, he took a sip of his own scalding tea, then set the cup aside. "So."</p>
<p>Lorenz closed his eyes briefly, knowing this was inevitable. "Which of us first?" he asked, his voice hoarse. </p>
<p>"I made the tea," Claude said lightly, almost teasing him, but for the sobriety of his expression. </p>
<p>Lorenz nodded, still staring into his tea. "What do you already know?"</p>
<p>Claude released a soft huff, but he didn't protest Lorenz batting the conversation back to him. "I rarely claim to know anything," he said, winking at Lorenz with a hint of his characteristic mischief. "But I suspect much."</p>
<p>Lorenz cleared his throat. "Such as?" he asked softly.</p>
<p>"Our crests," Claude said, narrowing his eyes slightly. "You have a crest of Riegan."</p>
<p>Gripping his teacup tightly, Lorenz nodded.</p>
<p>"This second crest—" Claude began, and paused, wincing. "It...makes you unwell?"</p>
<p>Lorenz swallowed heavily. "More than that. They told me it would...significantly shorten my lifespan." </p>
<p>Claude leaned closer. "How significantly?"</p>
<p>"I…" Lorenz bit his lip, his throat burning. <i>Damn</i>  Claude; Lorenz had made his peace with it, he <i>had</i>, before Claude. </p>
<p>"Lorenz," Claude murmured. He reached out, taking Lorenz's cup to put it aside and reaching for his hands. "How long do you have?"</p>
<p>Lorenz drew in a deep breath. The air felt like broken glass in his lungs. "They told me I would have perhaps...six or seven years." </p>
<p>Claude exhaled harshly. No doubt he could do the sum as easily as Lorenz could; seven years gave him until he was twenty-three, while his next birthday—only a few short months away, should he reach it—would see him turning twenty-four. </p>
<p>"Had they added a minor crest," Lorenz offered weakly, "I would perhaps have longer. But in my case, as in Lysithea's, they were...thorough."</p>
<p>"How thoughtful," Claude said, but he didn't sound amused. His voice was cold with fury. He was still holding Lorenz's hands, but now he loosened his grip, turning the hold into a caress, stroking the pad of his thumb over the base of Lorenz's palm. "I'm assuming...you and I, that wasn't part of the scheme?"</p>
<p>Lorenz smiled, bittersweet. "I tried to keep away from you. As it turns out, you're quite irresistible."</p>
<p>"I could have told you that," Claude said with a roguish smile, trying to cheer him.</p>
<p>"I believe you have," Lorenz said, returning his smile with as much fervour as he was able. "I—I should have told you, Claude, forgive me—" </p>
<p>Claude shook his head. "I of all people cannot fault you for keeping secrets."</p>
<p>"I wish…" Lorenz paused, swallowing thickly to ease the sudden tightness in his throat. "I wish that I could spare you the heartache that will arise from my passing, and for that, I apologise." He lowered his head, drawing Claude's hand to his forehead, pressing it there tightly. "I am so sorry, I've been terribly unfair to you."</p>
<p>"Lorenz," Claude protested, gripping Lorenz's hands more tightly. "You cannot think that matters now."</p>
<p>For just a moment, Lorenz let himself lean into Claude, gazing into the other man's eyes. For that one moment, he let himself think of all the things he could have, if the situation were different, and then he carefully, firmly, put it away again where it belonged, out of sight. Sitting up again, he cleared his throat. "Well, now you know all of my secrets," he said with a tight smile. "I believe it is your turn, wise leader."</p>
<p>Claude laughed a little, and gently extricated his hands from Lorenz's grasp. "It seems as though you've forgiven me for my sudden appearance in Fódlan all those years ago. The way I usurped your place."</p>
<p>"You have proven yourself time and again to be worthy of the position," Lorenz said with feeling.</p>
<p>"You must be curious though," Claude said, watching him with faint amusement in his eyes. "No doubt you thought me some illegitimate castoff." Lorenz opened his mouth to protest, but Claude held up his hand with a humourless laugh. "That or worse. Don't deny it, Lorenz, you'd every right to think it."</p>
<p>Lorenz huffed. "And you plan to enlighten me at last. Hurry on with it then, or need I remind you that I'm on borrowed time?"</p>
<p>Claude's expression twitched minutely, and Lorenz immediately regretted his impatient words. "My grandfather had two children," Claude said at last. "My mother, Tiana, wanted nothing to do with the duchy or the politics of Leicester. When she fell in love with a foreigner, the two of them eloped. I was born and raised in Almyra."</p>
<p>Lorenz's eyes widened. Of course, it made sense. There had been many hints over the years, but Lorenz had dismissed them, the thought of an Almyran invading the ranks of Fódlan's nobility too absurd to countenance. </p>
<p>"You're surprised," Claude observed, his voice carefully guarded.</p>
<p>Finding his throat thick, Lorenz swallowed before replying. "No," he said, ponderously. "I supposed you must have been from outside Fódlan, to stay hidden so long, and you told me as much just the other day. But...Almyra? Saints, we're still at <i>war</i>  with Almyra!"</p>
<p>The corner of Claude's mouth tilted. "My people aren't <i>all</i>  bloodthirsty monsters."</p>
<p>Lorenz hung his head, closing his eyes a moment. He didn't doubt that he must have said awful things to Claude without realising. "Please—forgive me, for anything I've ever said to hurt you. I have been very ignorant."</p>
<p>Claude shook his head. "We've both said our share of things we regret."</p>
<p>"You...think of yourself as Almyran then?" Lorenz ventured, lifting his head. "Your mother was Fódlanic, was she not?"</p>
<p>"Aye, but Almyra is what I know, where I grew up." He gave a bitter little laugh. "Not that it was a great deal more welcoming than Fódlan has been."</p>
<p>"I'm so sorry," Lorenz whispered. "I cannot blame you for hiding it."</p>
<p>Claude shook his head. "Forgive me for putting this off so long," He said, looking pained. "It wasn't that I didn't trust you."</p>
<p>"I gave you little enough reason to do so," Lorenz admitted, feeling sick and guilty.</p>
<p>Claude finally grinned at him, his cold exterior cracking slightly. "That wasn't the only reason I hid it from you. You see, my mother didn't run off with just any Almyran. My father, then prince, is now the king."</p>
<p>Lorenz stared at him. "I beg your pardon? Claude von Riegan, are you telling me that you—you're a <i>prince</i>?" </p>
<p>Laughing softly, Claude just shrugged, his eyes twinkling. </p>
<p>"I don't believe it." Lorenz laughed weakly. "I've been bedding a foreign prince. So much for diplomacy." He sighed, shaking his head at himself, then glanced at Claude, who was watching him patiently. "So, what are you—what does this mean?"</p>
<p>Claude snorted. "It means I've left a mess behind that needs cleaning up." He grinned without warmth. "However ill you think of me now, I promise you my people think far worse of the prospect of someone with Fódlanic ancestry inheriting the throne."</p>
<p>So he might inherit after all. Lorenz accepted that quietly, sadly, tucking it away with his other regrets. "I don't think ill of you, Claude."</p>
<p>"You think ill of my people," Claude said, half-shrugging. "Not that I blame you. Nobody in Almyra thinks very highly of Fódlan either." He smiled faintly. "Someday, perhaps, that will change."</p>
<p>"Someday soon, I hope," Lorenz offered. "And, for what it's worth, the way your people have come to our aid of late—consider my opinion quite changed when it comes to relations with Almyra."</p>
<p>The look Claude gave him was inexpressibly tender, his gaze grateful and longing. "Thank you Lorenz." He took one of Lorenz's hands, lifting it to his face to kiss his palm, and causing Lorenz's lips to part on a sigh. "I'm so sorry, Lorenz," he said, his voice soft. "If not for me—if your father hadn't felt the need to—" He broke off, shaking his head. "I'm sorry you felt you had to shoulder your burden alone."</p>
<p>Lorenz reached out to run his fingers through Claude's hair. He was, like most of them, in need of a bath, his hair dirty and tangled. "I couldn't put that weight on your shoulders," Lorenz whispered, stroking his thumb along one of Claude's eyebrows. "I didn't mean to hide it, I just—I didn't know how to tell you." He smiled faintly. "And besides, you've had enough to worry about."</p>
<p>Claude laughed weakly. "That's true." When he lifted his eyes to Lorenz's once more, they shone in the lamplight. "I cannot bear to lose you, Lorenz."</p>
<p>Tears stung Lorenz's own eyes. "Neither you or I has a choice about that. And you must surely have things to attend to back in Almyra."</p>
<p>"So instead you'd ask me to leave you here to die?" Claude asked, anger creeping into his tone. </p>
<p>"I—"</p>
<p>Claude's eyes were fierce. "<i>You</i>  may have given up, Lorenz, but I refuse to do so."</p>
<p>Lorenz's chest hitched, and he exhaled heavily. "What do you propose, then? If Lysithea and Linhardt don't find a solution soon…"</p>
<p>"Then I'll divide my time between here and Almyra," Claude said simply. "Or you can come to me, if you can bear to."</p>
<p>Tears burned Lorenz's eyes. "What are you saying?"</p>
<p>"I want peace between our two nations, Lorenz," Claude said, as though this was obvious. "One day, perhaps, we'll even have an alliance." He reached out for Lorenz's hands again. "Perhaps...for us too."</p>
<p>"An alliance?" Lorenz asked, puzzled. Then, meaning struck, and he gasped. "Is that—Claude, are you—?"</p>
<p>"Shh." Claude leaned in and silenced him gently with his lips. "Don't say it, not yet."</p>
<p>Lorenz stared at him, his thoughts ablaze and his heart trembling in his chest. "But—"</p>
<p>Claude shook his head. "Not tonight."</p>
<p>Sighing, Lorenz subsided. "Tomorrow then," he said reluctantly. He dabbed at the corners of his eyes with his sleeves and cleared his throat. "What now? Do you wish me to go?"</p>
<p>"Stay," Claude said without hesitation. "At least for tonight."</p>
<p>Perhaps he should have refused, but Lorenz realised then that whatever time he might have left, he wanted to spend as much of it as possible at Claude's side. "Alright," he said, nodding.</p>
<p>With a smile, Claude lifted Lorenz's hands to his face, kissing them one by one, then leaned in to press their lips together softly. "Lorenz," he whispered, his voice like a fingertip stroking down Lorenz's spine. "Come to bed with me." He brushed a strand of hair behind Lorenz's ear. "We needn't make love. Just lay with me."</p>
<p>Lorenz nodded, unable to speak. </p>
<p>Smiling, Claude drew him to his feet and kissed him slowly. Lorenz was dressed casually, having stripped out of most of his armour following the battle. Claude tugged at the edge of Lorenz's shirt before pulling it over his head, resuming their kiss clumsily. Meanwhile, Lorenz pawed at Claude's shirt and trousers, eager to fall into the familiar rhythm of Claude's breathing as they lay beside one another. </p>
<p>They managed a slow disrobing as the two of them stumbled over to the bed. It felt like the first time, months ago, that they had stumbled into bed together, but lacking the same sense of urgency. Now it felt inevitable, almost soporific, like falling into a dream. Claude shed the last of his clothing and clambered onto his bedroll, tugging Lorenz down to join him.</p>
<p>"Just—put your hands on me, please," he sighed as Lorenz lay down with him.</p>
<p>Lorenz obliged, burying his head in Claude's neck as he tossed a leg over his hip. He drew a hand over Claude's ribs, his thigh, and back up, reverently. Claude's warmth bled into his own body, relaxing him. </p>
<p>"Thank you for trusting me with your heritage, Claude," Lorenz whispered at length. "That cannot have been easy."</p>
<p>But Claude just smiled. "I'd trust you with my life."</p>
<p>Emotion roared in Lorenz's chest, threatening to choke him. "And I'd defend it to my dying breath."</p>
<p>They lay in silence a little while, then Claude pulled him closer, and Lorenz went happily into his embrace. </p>
<p>"So...Your Highness, is it?" Lorenz asked quietly.</p>
<p>Claude wrinkled his nose. "Not to you," he said, and lifted Lorenz's hand to his mouth to kiss it. "Never to you."</p>
<p>"I can't believe I never guessed," Lorenz said to cover his flush. "You hid your heritage well."</p>
<p>Claude's mouth tightened. "I had little choice. Your father wouldn't have been the only one to try and oust me if they knew."</p>
<p>"He probably would have stuck the blade in you himself," Lorenz said, grimacing as he trailed his fingers down to Claude's chest. "I'm grateful he never got the chance."</p>
<p>Claude laughed. "As am I." He brushed Lorenz's hair back from his face, the rough pad of his thumb brushing gently against Lorenz's temple. "I do feel as though I owe you an apology, though. Sleeping with an Almyran prince probably won't do much for your reputation."</p>
<p>"Oh?" Lorenz smiled. "You're planning to tell the whole country?"</p>
<p>Claude chuckled. "Not at this moment, no, but these things do have a habit of getting out."</p>
<p>"Especially if you keep making such a fuss over me in front of the healers."</p>
<p>"I told you," Claude said. "I need you around to run the Alliance for me. Who else am I supposed to leave in charge, Hilda? She'd never forgive me."</p>
<p>"Mm, that's true," Lorenz murmured, his eyelids growing heavy.</p>
<p>Claude pressed a kiss to his brow. "Rest, Lorenz. It's been a long day."</p>
<p>Lorenz hummed softly, and between that breath and the next, he was asleep.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>—</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Several months had passed since they officially brought the war to a close. Lorenz and Claude's lives had been exceptionally busy in the intervening weeks, even more than during the war. </p>
<p>They had stolen a golden afternoon together, after an impromptu address to the noble families of the realm and a meeting with the harbourmaster about the changing tariffs. It was the perfect moment, Lorenz thought, surrounded by the soft afternoon light that fairly glowed through their rooms. </p>
<p>Lorenz took his time pressing kisses into Claude’s skin, dragging teeth and tongue and lips over the hidden spots that made Claude cry out and grasp. Even though the war was over, there were still precious few occasions that allowed them the freedom to explore one another without haste, and Lorenz was heartened by the way Claude threw himself into their lovemaking without reservation. They tangled themselves together for what seemed like hours, taking their pleasure from each other until they collapsed together, sated and content.</p>
<p>Lorenz was roused some time later by a particularly heavy footfall from outside his door. He stretched with a yawn, then peered over at Claude, whose chest still rose and fell steadily. Lorenz cupped his cheek, feeling an ache in his chest. </p>
<p>As he slipped into his dressing gown, he spotted the pile of correspondence on his desk. Personal correspondence, as the servants were instructed to place any reports and other post-war nonsense in his study. On the top of the pile, Lorenz spotted an envelope addressed in Lysithea’s peculiarly crabbed script, and he picked it up to investigate further. </p>
<p>"What's that?" Claude murmured, stirring in the bed as Lorenz opened his letter.</p>
<p>"From Lysithea," Lorenz said, glancing over at him idly. "You've awoken at last, I see."</p>
<p>Claude chuckled softly and beckoned him closer. "Come back to bed."</p>
<p>Lorenz hesitated. "My letter—"</p>
<p>"Bring it with you," Claude said, giving him a heated look. </p>
<p>Lorenz huffed, a smile stealing over his face. "You are incorrigible," he said, turning back to his letter. "Or should I say indefatigable?"</p>
<p>"Who can blame me?" Claude asked, sitting up and shuffling closer to the end of the bed. "When you're here to tempt me?"</p>
<p>Daring another glance at him, Lorenz's mouth went dry at the sight. Claude was naked with the sheets caught around his hips, his hair tousled from sleep, dark curls hanging over his brow. He looked excessively tempting himself, and Lorenz wetted his lower lip with his tongue as he formulated a response. </p>
<p>"What does she write?" Claude asked, nodding to the letter in Lorenz's hand. Wry amusement played around his eyes and mouth, as though he knew precisely the response he engendered in Lorenz and relished it entirely. </p>
<p>Lorenz cleared his throat and glanced again at the letter. "They have not discovered anything new. But they have theories—"</p>
<p>"Ahh," Claude sighed, getting up from the bed. He moved behind Lorenz, draping his arms over Lorenz's shoulders and pressing a kiss to the top of his head. "I'm sorry. They'll find something, I know they will."</p>
<p>"Claude," Lorenz said with a sigh of his own. He reached up to cover one of Claude's hands with his own. "We have to—you must accept that there may not be a way."  </p>
<p>Claude shook his head. "Don't speak of such things when I've just wrung you dry," he said into Lorenz's hair. "Does she need another blood sample from you?" </p>
<p>"It seems she doesn't require one," Lorenz said, quickly skimming the letter. "But I must insist that you confront this... desire not to confront the fact that I may soon be no longer of this world." </p>
<p>Claude hooked his chin over Lorenz's shoulder, and his voice was deceptively mild when he asked, "What good will that do? You'll think yourself into an early grave." </p>
<p>"My grave is already early," Lorenz murmured. "I've had a plot set aside at Hartley since before I started at Garreg Mach." </p>
<p>Claude was silent for a moment. "Why are you acting as if this illness has already defeated you?" </p>
<p>"Why do you act as if you're not leaving for Almyra in a week's time?" Lorenz shot back, pulling away from him. He turned to glare at him, but after a moment he subsided with a wince. "I—I apologize. That was beneath me."</p>
<p>"No," Claude said, reaching out to brush Lorenz's cheek with his knuckles. "It's alright."</p>
<p>"I know you must go," Lorenz said, glancing down at his lap. "I'm just—I'm so afraid that—it may be the last time we see one another."</p>
<p>Grimacing, Claude took hold of Lorenz's hands and drew him out of his chair, leading him to sit on the bed. "Lorenz," he began, pausing briefly to search for the words before continuing. "What if you came with me?"</p>
<p>Lorenz stared at him. "Are you mad?"</p>
<p>"Why not?" Claude asked, a familiar, dogged look coming in his eyes. "Don't misunderstand me, I think you're a great asset to the new Alliance here in Fódlan, but there are others who could continue that work. Why not come away with me? If your time really is so limited, let's spend it together."</p>
<p>"But—" Lorenz shook his head. "You can't mean—" He sighed. "Claude, you're a prince."</p>
<p>"Oh, am I?" Claude grinned at him. "I suppose that means I can do whatever I want." He reached out and cupped Lorenz's cheek. "Love whoever I want."</p>
<p>"Love?" Lorenz echoed, his throat tightening. </p>
<p>Claude just smiled. </p>
<p>"Even if—" Lorenz broke off, unable to voice such a wonderful, terrible truth. "I cannot just up sticks and leave tomorrow."</p>
<p>"Then come in two weeks," Claude said. "A month. Two. I don't care. Just say you'll come."</p>
<p>Tears stung Lorenz's eyes. "Claude."</p>
<p>"I love you," Claude said, brushing his thumb against Lorenz's cheek. His eyes were wet. "Lorenz, I—I can't make this decision."</p>
<p>Lorenz's face crumpled. He buried his face in Claude's shoulder, drawing in a shuddering gasp as Claude put his arms around him. "I—don't know what to do," Lorenz admitted, a sob tearing from him. "It's—not—f-fair. It's not fair."</p>
<p>"I know," Claude soothed, stroking his hair. "Shh, I know."</p>
<p>They held one another for several minutes, until Claude gently urged him onto the bed properly, and the two of them lay down side by side. </p>
<p>"I wish I knew how long is left," Lorenz murmured, as they lay together, fingers entwined. "I—thought I would be dead by now. Yet I've scarcely had so much as a head cold since that strange illness at Hartley."</p>
<p>Claude hummed, stroking Lorenz's knuckles gently. Then, all of a sudden, he froze, eyes widening. </p>
<p>Lorenz made an inquisitive sound.  "Claude?"</p>
<p>"Wait," Claude murmured. He released Lorenz's fingers and scrambled to his feet, beginning to pace back and forth. </p>
<p>Lorenz sat up and stared at him. "Claude? What is it?"</p>
<p>"Your illness," Claude said, one hand at his mouth as he paced, clearly deep in thought. "You were—you almost died. The healer said they couldn't find anything wrong. But as soon as I arrived..."</p>
<p>Lorenz stared. "...I started to recover."</p>
<p>"How could I miss it?" Claude hissed. "I feel so stupid. It was there all along."</p>
<p>"It's no matter, I missed it as well," Lorenz said mindlessly, his thoughts scattered. "Do you—Claude, you don't think that it's a cure for...all of it? Everything?" </p>
<p>Claude rubbed his forehead. "I have no idea," he said honestly. "Gods, the only way I can think to know for sure would be to try it again." </p>
<p>Lorenz's heart sunk. "Yes. Yes, that's what I thought you'd say." He didn't relish overmuch experiencing again the fatigue that had plagued him, or the return of walking with a cane, and the thinness of his hair. Still less did he like the thought of being parted from Claude again for so long.</p>
<p>"How long were we apart before?" Claude asked. "It was months, wasn't it? Half a year or so?" </p>
<p>"Almost six months exactly," Lorenz said. He bit his lip. This was more of a breakthrough than Lysithea and Linhardt had had in their years of searching. "I had—do you think that I could cure Lysithea with this, Claude? Why hasn't she ever felt ill, being away from me?" </p>
<p>Claude scratched his beard. "I wouldn't imagine so," he said slowly. "You didn't have the same connection with her that you had with me, right? Maybe it doesn't work if the other person also has two crests." </p>
<p>"Oh." Lorenz said, wilting a bit. "Well. I should write to her, at least, and inform her of this development."</p>
<p>"Later," Claude said, pressing him down gently as Lorenz made to get up. He climbed back onto the bed, sitting down opposite Lorenz. "Lorenz, this could be—this might be a solution." He was starting to smile, seemingly unable to stop. "Maybe I can save you."</p>
<p>Reluctantly, a matching smile spread over Lorenz's face. "You should know better than to get your hopes up."</p>
<p>"I don't care." Claude cupped his face and kissed him softly, still smiling. "Will you come? Even just for a little while?"</p>
<p>Lorenz nodded. "I will."</p>
<p>"You will? Really?" </p>
<p>"I said it, did I not?"</p>
<p>Claude beamed at him. "I'm just happy to hear it. Tell me again, tell me you'll come to me."</p>
<p>"Claude," Lorenz said, laughing. "I will. Of course I will."</p>
<p>"Do I have your full permission to buy you a new wardrobe? You won't survive a day in Almyra in all your fussy Fódlan clothing." </p>
<p>Lorenz's cheeks coloured. "That's thinking much too far ahead, Claude, please. We have five months." </p>
<p>"Five months?" </p>
<p>"I'm afraid that at six months, you would have to tie me to a wyvern," Lorenz admitted. "The illness progresses quickly."</p>
<p>Claude shook his head. "I won't accept more than three. If you're not at my side by the end of Wyvern Moon, I'll come back here and fetch you myself."</p>
<p>Lorenz rolled his eyes, giving a huff of laughter. "Wouldn't that negate my need to travel at all?"</p>
<p>"I mean it," Claude said, his voice soft but firm. "I won't lose you."</p>
<p>Lorenz glanced down at his hands. "And—what if it works? What then?"</p>
<p>Claude frowned at him. "What do you mean?"</p>
<p>"If, by some miracle, I survive another six months," Lorenz said, and licked his lips nervously. "A year? Two? What then?"</p>
<p>"Then we'll have a party?" Claude suggested, clearly bemused.</p>
<p>Lorenz sighed. "You don't understand. What happens when I don't die?"</p>
<p>Claude tilted his head. "Are you asking me what you'll do in Almyra?" He lifted Lorenz's hand and kissed it, then began to trail his lips along Lorenz's wrist. "You could learn to speak Almyran," he murmured, lips teasing the soft skin of Lorenz's forearm. "Or grow roses."</p>
<p>"That's not what I—"</p>
<p>"Become an emissary? Take up painting? Eat sweets every day and get fat?"</p>
<p>Lorenz sighed. "Claude."</p>
<p>Claude's laughter skimmed over the inside of his elbow. "Anything you like, Lorenz! What's the matter? Why do you look so miserable at the prospect?"</p>
<p>"Because it isn't <i>fair</i>," Lorenz protested. "I don't want you to feel compelled to stay with me, simply because I might die if you do not."</p>
<p>"What are you talking about?" Claude asked, sitting up straight, pretty brows drawing in. "I want you to come."</p>
<p>"And when you tire of my company?" Lorenz prompted.</p>
<p>Claude tilted his head again. "Do you <i>want</i>  me to get tired of you?"</p>
<p>"No!"</p>
<p>"Lorenz," Claude said, with an exasperated huff of laughter. "You <i>do</i>  realise what I'm proposing, don't you?"</p>
<p>Lorenz blinked at him. "What do you mean?"</p>
<p>Glancing down, Claude smiled. He snagged a loose thread from the embroidered coverlet, then lifted Lorenz's hand and looped the length of thread around his ring finger. There was a long, pregnant silence of several seconds, in which Lorenz scarcely dared to breathe, until Claude finally cleared his throat. "Just a thought," he murmured. </p>
<p>Lorenz stared at his hand, his heart beating fast, then lifted his eyes to Claude's. "I—I—"</p>
<p>"Let's talk about it when you come to Almyra," Claude said, a faint smile tugging at the corner of his mouth. </p>
<p>Tears stung Lorenz's eyes again. He flung his arms around Claude, shivering a little when Claude returned his embrace just as eagerly. "By the end of Wyvern Moon," Lorenz promised.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>If you are reading this after we updated chapter 11, please do not forget to go ahead and read chapter 12 also, as this is a double update!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0012"><h2>12. Epilogue</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>If you're about to read this: STOP, please make sure you've read chapter 11 first, as this is a DOUBLE UPDATE!! :3c</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>They had only been back at Garreg Mach for a day, and yet already Lorenz felt as if he'd never left, so quickly had he fallen into the familiar rhythm of the place. Their old friends and comrades had been arriving in ones and twos for the reunion, while Lorenz aided the Professor with logistics such as ensuring that everyone had somewhere to sleep, and that enough food and drink had been supplied. </p><p>The brisk autumn air was a refreshing surprise. Lorenz had grown familiar with the dry heat of the Almyran sun, and he found himself donning his old Academy cloak more often than not in the cooler Fódlanic climate. Claude seemed not to notice the change in temperature, though it was hardly surprising given his industry. He rushed about the monastery each day, greeting new arrivals with such enthusiasm that one could be forgiven for thinking it was his sole purpose in life. Lorenz might have relieved him of the task, but couldn’t deny him the easy social pleasures he was so frequently denied as an Almyran royal.</p><p>Claude had neglected to share the names of <em>all</em>  the visitors with him, however, and Lorenz found himself pleasantly surprised to see Holst, Alois—now a general in the new Fódlanic martial force—and even Judith mingling with the crowd on the night of the penultimate celebration.</p><p>Freeing himself at last from a string of polite encounters with guests, Lorenz made his way toward the latter. "Judith!" he called, raising his arm in greeting. "There you are!" </p><p>Spotting him, Judith strode across the great hall to greet him, reaching out to grasp his forearms as she approached. "Lorenz, it's good to see you again."</p><p>Smiling, Lorenz kissed her on both cheeks, then drew back to look at her. "I could swear that you haven't aged a day since we last saw one another." </p><p>Judith laughed heartily. "And you're looking well," she said, her gaze straying to the purple streak of hair at his temple. "My, I remember that colour on you," she continued, her voice light but her eyes full of feeling. "It suits you."</p><p>"Thank you," Lorenz said, warmth suffusing his chest. "I must have been very young then." Collecting himself, he shook off the memories and offered her his arm. "Forgive my manners, I would have come to greet you sooner had I known you were here. Have you had some food yet? A drink, perhaps?"</p><p>"Aye, I've had a warm welcome from your friends," she said, grinning. "It's wonderful to see everyone together again."</p><p>They began to walk together, moving away from the crowds, talking easily. Lorenz had only seen Judith a handful of times since the close of the war, but she had welcomed him like family once he and Claude made their relationship public, and Lorenz thought of her much as the older sibling he had never had. </p><p>"Have you seen your family yet since your arrival in Fódlan?" Judith asked as they retired to a quiet corner. "You have a lot of them, as I recall." </p><p>"Oh, yes!" Lorenz exclaimed. "Maya—my stepmother, you recall—and my younger siblings, they're all still at Hartley Park. Lysithea and Linhardt have been staying there too, on and off, for the use of the library. My great-grandfather was a great collector of magical tomes and history."</p><p>"So I've heard," Judith said with a mysterious smile. "And you've been to see that clever sister of yours, I hope."</p><p>Lorenz released a wistful sigh. "Adelina is so grown up now, I scarcely recognise the little girl I remember."</p><p>Judith nodded. "I've been impressed with Adelina. She'll be a great addition to the council, when she's a little older."</p><p>Lorenz smiled, unable to hide his pleasure at the praise. "I know how much she values your guidance. I cannot thank you enough for taking care of her for me, especially while she's been in Derdriu."</p><p>"There's little I can teach her that she hasn't already found out by her own means," Judith said, laughing fondly. "She reminds me a little of my cousin in that sense. Always thinking, always planning."</p><p>"Yes, she is like Claude," Lorenz said, smiling again at the thought.</p><p>Judith smiled and gently touched her fist to his chest, over his heart. "She reminds me a great deal of you, too, Lorenz. She has your idealism, your nobility."</p><p>"Ah…" A faint flush touched Lorenz's cheeks. "Thank you, Judith. I have done my best to instill in her the values that I—that my mother passed on to me."</p><p>"She's a credit to your family," Judith said, nodding. "As are you."</p><p>Lorenz beamed at her. "Thank you, Judith."</p><p>"Mm. And what of my cousin?" Judith asked, glancing around as though afraid Claude might be about to sneak up on her. "Is he causing mischief as usual?"</p><p>"More than I can possibly recount in one conversation," Lorenz said with a laugh. "He's set his sights on a treaty with Morfis, now. I think he wants to unite the world."</p><p>Judith chuckled. "That sounds like him. A worthy goal. I must say—"</p><p>"Hey, Judith!"</p><p>Judith broke off as Claude came up to them, reaching out for Judith's hand. "And here's the young miscreant himself," she said fondly, offering her cheek for Claude to kiss. </p><p>"Ooh, have you been talking about me?" Claude asked, his eyes lighting up as he drew back from Judith and slid his arm around Lorenz's waist. "How exciting. Am I in trouble again, or were you just talking about how wonderful I am?"</p><p>"Why waste our breath when you've arrived to do the job for us?" Judith asked.</p><p>Claude laughed loudly. "Touché. How are you, Judith? I heard a rumour you brought a companion with you tonight."</p><p>"I wasn't aware my partnerships were such a fascinating source of gossip to have caught the attention of a foreign royal," Judith replied archly.</p><p>"Why didn't I hear of this?" Lorenz asked, glancing between them. "Judith, are you dallying with someone?"</p><p>Judith just replied with a roguish wink, which was startlingly reminiscent of Claude. "I'm sure it will reach you eventually," she replied, and reached out to pat him on the arm. "It was lovely to catch up with you, Lorenz. I can see that my cousin has something on his mind, so I'll leave you to one another for now."</p><p>Lorenz offered a token protest, but it was clear that Claude really did have something he wanted to say, and they said their farewells before ducking outside. The night air was cool, but it was a relief after the warmth of the hall, and Lorenz drew in a deep breath only to sigh it out happily. </p><p>"Long day?" Claude asked, beginning to walk slowly in the direction of the cathedral. </p><p>Lorenz followed, and when their fingers brushed, he slipped his hand into Claude's. "Several long days," Lorenz sighed. "But it's wonderful to see so many familiar faces."</p><p>"Aye," Claude murmured, clearly lost in thought, though he squeezed Lorenz's fingers to show that he was listening. "It's strange, coming back here, don't you think?"</p><p>"Mm. So many things happened in these walls."</p><p>Claude nodded, but he was quiet as they continued walking. The sun had set hours before, and the moon was now high above, the night cold and clear. Their shadows preceded them as they slowly ambled along the bridge. </p><p>"Sometimes I think," Claude began, his voice soft and ponderous, "of what might have become of us if we hadn't met here. If I'd never come to Fódlan, or you'd attended the academy a year sooner."</p><p>Lorenz swallowed thickly. "If I hadn't met you, I would likely be dead by now."</p><p>Claude huffed. "And perhaps one of those assassins would've finally caught me out." He paused, turning so that they faced one another, and lifted Lorenz's hand to his face. "Imagine if you'd never lost your temper with me that afternoon."</p><p>"...What afternoon?" Lorenz asked, cheeks warming as Claude held his cold fingers to his lips.</p><p>"Don't you recall?" Claude smiled. "The afternoon you got us banished to the stables."</p><p>Lorenz smiled, the memory of that golden, hazy afternoon rushing back to him. "You can hardly blame that on <i>me</i>."</p><p>"You mean you don't want to take the credit?" Claude asked, grinning at him. "That's not like you."</p><p>Lorenz rolled his eyes fondly. "Do you regret it?" he asked, reaching for Claude's other hand and interlacing their fingers. "Because I hope you know that I don't, and never will."</p><p>"No," Claude said, his smile subtle, and all the more precious for it. He moved closer, releasing one of Lorenz's hands to slip an arm around his waist. "Not for a moment. Never."</p><p>"Good," Lorenz said, laughing a little. "That would be terribly awkward."</p><p>Claude grinned. "Come on," he said, moving away, though he kept hold of Lorenz's hand. "There's somewhere I want to take you."</p><p>Lorenz followed, barely even pausing to question where Claude could possibly wish to take him at such an hour. Given Claude's usual proclivities, he half expected to find himself in an empty wyvern stall with his trousers around his ankles, but instead they skirted around the edge of the cathedral to where the Goddess Tower hulked in the darkness.</p><p>"And why have you brought us here, I wonder?" Lorenz asked, glancing over at Claude just as they stepped out of the shadow of the cathedral and a beam of moonlight fell over his lovely face. </p><p>For several moments, Claude didn't answer. When he did at last, it wasn't what Lorenz was expecting to hear.  "Have you talked to Lysithea yet?" </p><p>"I haven't," Lorenz answered, thrown. Lysithea had only arrived that afternoon, and there hadn't yet been time for them to talk. "I noticed she's looking well though." </p><p>Claude hummed. "I hear congratulations are in order for her and Linhardt." </p><p>"They're to be married?" Lorenz gasped. "I had no idea they were even courting!"</p><p>Claude burst into laughter at that, leaving Lorenz bemused. "No, not that I'm aware. But they think they've found a way to counteract the effects of her second crest."</p><p>"Oh. Oh, my goodness." Lorenz’s next breath was tremulous, and he placed his hand over his mouth for a moment, overwhelmed with relief. "After all these years, I admit I had given up hope."</p><p>"It's been a long wait for you both," Claude said softly.</p><p>Lorenz nodded, letting his hand fall, and reached for Claude instead. "If I hadn't had you," he began, voice breaking slightly. "I don't just mean because of our crests, but—if you hadn't given me something to live for—" He broke off, biting his lip. These were things they'd talked of many times before, but being back at Garreg Mach after so long was a painful reminder of all the ways that they had almost missed one another. </p><p>Claude lifted his hands to cup Lorenz's face. "Thank you," he murmured, "for not giving up."</p><p>Closing his eyes briefly, Lorenz leaned into his touch. "You would never have let me live it down."</p><p>Claude laughed under his breath. "That's true." He slid his hands down to rest against Lorenz's chest. "Are you happy, sweetheart?"</p><p>A flood of affection filled him, and Lorenz laughed as he opened his eyes again to take in Claude before him: the oh so familiar shape of his face, the delicate moth's wing of his eyelashes. "Desperately," he said, leaning in to press his lips to the corner of Claude's mouth. "Incandescently so."</p><p>Claude turned his head to capture Lorenz's lips with his own, and the two melted against one another with twin sighs. They had scarcely had a moment to themselves since arriving the previous day, and Lorenz found all his little cares and fears dissolving as he poured himself into Claude, wrapping him tight in his arms.</p><p>"You're shivering," Claude murmured as the heat between them cooled to a smoulder. "Is that a compliment to me, or should I get you back to our rooms to warm up?"</p><p>Lorenz smiled. "Perhaps both."</p><p>Claude laughed softly against Lorenz's cheek. "I love you," he said, arms folding tight around Lorenz's waist. </p><p>"And I you," Lorenz murmured, smiling. "More than there are stars in the Almyran sky."</p><p>"Don't they have the same amount of stars here in Fódlan?" Claude said, laughing.</p><p>Lorenz huffed. "Must you ruin all my romantic declarations?"</p><p>Claude shook his head. "It's a choice."</p><p>"You're a horror," Lorenz said affectionately. He kissed Claude again softly. "I think you had better take me upstairs after all so you can begin making it up to me."</p><p>"It's the least I can do for my poor, long-suffering husband," Claude agreed, taking his hand.</p><p>Lorenz tossed his hair, with its brand new purple streak against the stark white. "I couldn't agree more."</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>We hope you enjoyed this story. This was an incredible journey for us, learning to write together and bringing this relationship to life for you all. We had an absolute blast writing this, and will be writing more together in the near future!! Thanks for supporting us ♥</p>
        </blockquote><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p><a href="https://twitter.com/janebuzjane">find jane on twitter</a>  |  <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/JaneBuzJane/works?fandom_id=23985107">jane's three houses fic</a><br/><a href="https://twitter.com/notallbees">find bees on twitter</a>  |  <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/notallbees/works?fandom_id=23985107">bees' three houses fic</a></p></blockquote></div></div>
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